# What do you think about recording sex sessions? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [January 14, 2011, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602 "2011-01-14T15:13:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![Acid\_Lamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Acid\_Lamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acid_Lamp)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2011, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/161 "2011-01-16T23:52:16Z")
> [@Enola\_Gay](#): > > Yes it does matter to me, though I’m not sure my reasons are rational. It seems to me that the longer something exists, the greater the potential for its misuse. But theoretically if my gyn videotaped all his patients’ exams (including mine) and the tapes were kept for a long time…let’s say until the statute of limitations passed, I think I would be ok with that as long as I felt assured that there was no way they could be misused. > > As far as the ‘ultimate limit of permissable storage’ … they could be stored indefinitely, as long as I had some reasonable assurance that they would only be used/viewed in the event that I made allegations and the dr needed to defend himself. Interesting, thanks. Would you agree that the rationale is primarily an emotional reaction over any logical objection? ---
**Author:** ![Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jimmy_Chitwood)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/162 "2011-01-17T00:09:27Z")
**Acid Lamp** , is it irrational to object to the FBI assigning a team to track you everywhere you go for the rest of your life, recording all the while? If you don’t commit any crimes, they won’t get in your way at all, and nobody will notice. Totally OK? ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/163 "2011-01-17T00:13:46Z")
> [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](#): > > **Acid Lamp** , is it irrational to object to the FBI assigning a team to track you everywhere you go for the rest of your life, recording all the while? If you don’t commit any crimes, they won’t get in your way at all, and nobody will notice. Totally OK? Myself, theorectically speaking, if there are reasonable assurances that said info will not be used for any other purposes than to thwart my criminal activity, I don’t have too much heartburn with the idea. And surprisingly, I am one of the “keep your hands off my gun in case I need em for the revolution against the gubment” types. ---
**Author:** ![Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jimmy_Chitwood)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/164 "2011-01-17T00:16:20Z")
What if there aren’t reasonable assurances? ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/165 "2011-01-17T00:23:20Z")
> [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](#): > > What if there aren’t reasonable assurances? Well, gee I don’t know… ---
**Author:** ![Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jimmy_Chitwood)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/166 "2011-01-17T00:30:55Z")
My point there being that, in the case of a person bringing a sex partner home to his/her place, the partner obviously has no such assurances. In fact, the whole process of providing that kind of assurance is subverted by the secrecy to begin with. Whether or not you have reason to accept the capture of information based on the circumstances, you’re never going to get to make that decision if you aren’t told it’s happening. Which is why, in my opinion, one needs to be told. ---
**Author:** ![Acid\_Lamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Acid\_Lamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acid_Lamp)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/167 "2011-01-17T00:33:50Z")
> [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](#): > > **Acid Lamp** , is it irrational to object to the FBI assigning a team to track you everywhere you go for the rest of your life, recording all the while? If you don’t commit any crimes, they won’t get in your way at all, and nobody will notice. Totally OK? That would depend. If I am totally unaware of them then it causes me no harm. However, If I am made aware of their activities then I can make an argument that _from that point forward_ they are causing me harm. I’m not certain that the comparison washes well though since they are actively monitoring me for criminal activity. They are fishing. In the Case of the OP he is passively recording in case someone accuses _HIM_ of criminal activity. ---
**Author:** ![Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jimmy_Chitwood)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/169 "2011-01-17T00:38:39Z")
Just to be clear, then, in actual, literal terms, you’re saying you’d have no problem with this if it turned out it was happening to you? ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/170 "2011-01-17T00:40:33Z")
Spam reported. ---
**Author:** ![Acid\_Lamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Acid\_Lamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acid_Lamp)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/171 "2011-01-17T00:56:03Z")
If you are asking me **Jimmy** , it isn’t a simple yes or no answer. In your hypothetical the FBI is actively watching me and fishing. They won’t interfere unless I do something wrong. They are quite literally waiting for me to do something wrong so they can punish me. In the case of the OP, the cameras capture everything, not just sexual encounters. Further, they are not actively monitoring. They are used as a system of proof should their owner become subjected to a false accusation. They are acting as evidence of his innocence, not guilt. Nobody is watching, nobody is judging or waiting. The camera simply provides an impartial record of reality should a situation arise in which it is a case of his word against hers. Of course I would be bothered if I found out that I was the subject of constant surveilance by the FBI, In America I have both the right to privacy, and supposition of my innocence. Without reason, they cannot engage in such behaviour. However, my gripe would be legal, not ethical in nature as they did nothing to interfere in my life. It is my awareness of their actions that make them problematic _to me_. The OP is different. He is a private citizen protecting himself from an accusation that is both societally damning, and expensive to litigate. It is a claim that often does not require a high level of proof for conviction; and one that is often used to leverage large monetary settlements out of the accused. Protecting oneself from legalized blackmail is not ethically wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jimmy_Chitwood)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/172 "2011-01-17T01:13:58Z")
Those are distinctions without differences as far as I can see. When you say “of course I would be bothered” when you found out that you’d been recorded, it seems to me that you’re saying that you’d think a wrong had been done, whether you acknowledge it as such or not. Why be bothered by it if there’s no harm? And if there’s harm, clearly it existed the whole time. The only change is that you found out about it. If you hadn’t found out, the same wrong would exist from an objective point of view. It’s the same thing in both cases - a person has an expectation that certain things are private. When that expectation is violated, the person feels wronged. If the person _doesn’t_ find out, they don’t feel wronged. But that doesn’t mean the wrong disappears, or, at least, if it doesn’t mean that in the one case, it can’t mean that in the other. ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/173 "2011-01-17T01:28:32Z")
> [@Acid\_Lamp](#): > > To be violated you have to be _wronged_. To be so, you must be aware of it. Right there is the fallacy in your reasoning. ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/174 "2011-01-17T01:30:37Z")
> [@Acid\_Lamp](#): > > That would depend. > > If I am totally unaware of them then it causes me no harm. However, If I am made aware of their activities then I can make an argument that _from that point forward_ they are causing me harm. In other words, it’s only wrong if the perpetrator gets caught. O-kay. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/175 "2011-01-17T01:34:33Z")
> [@JThunder](#): > > In other words, it’s only wrong if the perpetrator gets caught. > > O-kay. Yeah, thats EXACTLY it :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![fuzzypickles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9d8465/32.png) [@fuzzypickles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fuzzypickles)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/176 "2011-01-17T01:52:48Z")
> [@Acid\_Lamp](#): > > Of course I would be bothered if I found out that I was the subject of constant surveilance by the FBI, In America I have both the right to privacy, and supposition of my innocence. Without reason, they cannot engage in such behaviour. Damned straight – unless _very_ extraordinary circumstances apply, I wouldn’t want the FBI or any other agency violating my privacy w/o good cause…and even in that highly unlikely scenario, I’d still be a little pissed off. :rolleyes: > [@Acid\_Lamp](#): > > I fail to see how that causes harm to anyone. While I don’t like the idea of being filmed unknowingly in a private act, I cannot help but feel that stems from the reality that such footage is nearly always gathered for a clandestine purpose. Without that usage though, there is no harm to myself. The likelihood of such material being used solely for private purposes is EXTREMELY implausible, esp. since the recording’s made without the 2nd party’s consent. C’mon, think about it – the entire “Protect Against False Accusations of Rape” theory is utterly facile on its face, no reasonable individual would buy that particular claim. Heck, even a mutual agreement to record mutually consentual sex runs a high risk of unexpected results – just ask Tommy Lee & Pamela Anderson! ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Gay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3ab097/32.png) [@Enola\_Gay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Gay)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/177 "2011-01-17T01:58:17Z")
> [@Acid\_Lamp](#): > > Interesting, thanks. Would you agree that the rationale is primarily an emotional reaction over any logical objection? Entirely emotional. Consider the following scenarios: 1. Gyn videotapes my exam without my knowledge (and those of all patients), as a cya measure so he’ll have a defense (aside from he said/she said) in the event that he is accused of wrong doing in the future. 2. Gyn videotapes my exam without my knowledge, so that in the future he can jerk off to the tapes over and over again to satisfy some demented fetish. 3. I hook up with Brad Pitt and we go back to his place which is wired with a sophisticated motion detector activated security cam that happens to film us having sex. 4. I hook up with Brad Pitt and we go back to his place which is wired with a security camera that he has set up to film sex acts (without his partners’ knowledge), for use only if he is accused of date rape in the future…either via the legal system or privately in an attempt to extort money. 5. I hook up with Brad Pitt and we go back to his place which is wired with a camera that he has set up to film sex acts -without the knowledge or consent of his partner- so he can beat off to them later. I have the same level of damages (zero) in all the above scenarios, in that I have no idea that a tape even exists…therefore no mental anguish, feelings of being wronged etc. But scenarios 2 & 5 are creepy, gross, and hopefully illegal. But in scenarios 1 & 3 above, I wouldn’t feel violated in the least. So yes, I presume my reaction is emotional rather than logical. ---
**Author:** ![Acid\_Lamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Acid\_Lamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acid_Lamp)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/178 "2011-01-17T02:19:54Z")
> [@JThunder](#): > > Right there is the fallacy in your reasoning. How so? Demonstrate that you can be wronged while being totally unaware of the “wrong” done you. Perception is everything. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/179 "2011-01-17T02:33:45Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > Yet more sexual insults. And of course the classic accusation that as a man I’m out to sexually humiliate women. > > And - again - I said a solution besides celibacy, lying or foolhardiness on the part of the man. You’re just repeating your non-solution with more sexual insults. Why are you ruling out celibacy? It’s not like women owe you sex–it’s hardly a fundamental right. And if women choose to withhold sex from a disgusting voyeuristic perv (the hypothetical bachelor proposed by the OP), hey–their choice…except you want to take their choice away because you seem to feel your right to sex outweighs their right to give informed consent. Let’s try a thought experiment. Forget the videotaping. Instead, our disgusting perv bachelor has some sort of horrible venereal disease. It’s rarely transmitted from men to women, but it _can_ potentially happen and has been transmitted from men to women. Hypothetical bachelor has two choices: 1. Don’t tell the woman and hope she doesn’t get it. 2. Tell the woman and take the chance that she refuses to have sex with him. And if she does chose not to, live with the consequences and jack off alone. Which is the decent thing to do? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/180 "2011-01-17T04:22:53Z")
What the hell kind of women are you sleeping with if you’re THAT paranoid of being accused of rape, to the point that you’re setting up _hidden security cameras_? Maybe you need to reconsider the type of person you’re seeing? If you truly, SERIOUSLY think this is a big issue, then perhaps you should see a therapist – because you have some major trust issues. (I’m talking “you” in the general sense) (And question – are you only going to have sex at your own place? Never at her house, a hotel, etc?) Christ. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602/181 "2011-01-17T05:11:18Z")
> [@Fenris](#): > > Why are you ruling out celibacy? It’s not like women owe you sex–it’s hardly a fundamental right. No, but they want sex just like men do. So celibacy isn’t a solution for the larger problem, it just ensures everyone is unhappy. And just as important it isn’t a “solution” most people will accept so it’s useless. It’s the gender-relations equivalent of abstinence-only sex education. > [@Fenris](#): > > Let’s try a thought experiment. Forget the videotaping. Instead, our disgusting perv bachelor has some sort of horrible venereal disease. It’s rarely transmitted from men to women, but it _can_ potentially happen and has been transmitted from men to women. False comparison, that’s an assault. > [@Guinastasia](#): > > What the hell kind of women are you sleeping with if you’re THAT paranoid of being accused of rape, to the point that you’re setting up _hidden security cameras_? Maybe you need to reconsider the type of person you’re seeing? As has been repeatedly been pointed out, the answer to that question is “a woman”. One more time; the problem is the lopsided favoring of women when it comes to such accusations, not any particular woman. There’s no identifiable group of women that can be avoided to stay safe. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-about-recording-sex-sessions/567602.md?page=10)