# What do you think of interracial couples? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 28, 2012, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331 "2012-11-28T01:55:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![Krouget](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b38774/32.png) [@Krouget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krouget)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2012, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/161 "2012-11-30T21:15:45Z")
> [@brazil84](#): > > The value is that I like it. That sounds more like a preference than an actual value, within the context of your previous statement. Your original idea inferred that there was some type of explainable or demonstrable broader importance to keeping various races distinct; not just the segregation of races of people in a world that’s getting smaller. > [@](#): > > Do you see value in having Polar Bears as a distinct species from Brown Bears? Or is it all the same to you if Polar Bears are assimilated and disappear as a distinct group? You’re hinting at the intent behind two entirely different ideas, here. The answer to your first question, without going into too much detail, is no. The only relevant reason any distinction exists between the two in the first place, is clearly linked to the difference in environments they inhabit-- they have greater geological challenges than humans, for a host of different reasons. The second question lends to a strawman, and misaligns the natural tendency for any group to adapt and evolve-- no disrespect intended, but its a non-starter. > [@](#): > > Well it depends on how you define and measure “actual diversity.” From the genetic level right on up to an individuals phenotype. The further you mix, the more genetic diversity there is. What you seem to be aiming for, is a quantitative separation of races, as related to their more distinctive physical traits (and possibly culture). This gets back to the original question, which asked why you saw value in this. > [@](#): > > I’m not sure that it’s a conscious process. And even if it were, the other person has to find you attractive as well. Some aspects of it are conscious, while other portions are a matter of social-conditioning and a host of other factors. However, it’s pretty understandable, that in areas of the US, for example, where people are more likely to come into contact with those of another race, that those races will then mix-- NY and many parts of the Washington DC/VA/MD tri-state area serve as personal examples. To contrast this, areas where little interaction exists between people of different races, tend to harbor more objection towards the idea. So I’d have to strongly argue that yes, if people were to more regularly interact with those of other races, and didn’t tie their relationships to what a person physically looked like, that your chances of finding a “suitable mate” would largely increase-- because biologically speaking, nothing renders a person of another race “_unsuitable_”, meaning the only other barrier exist as a mental construct, be it in the form of indoctrination, culture, or otherwise. > [@](#): > > I wouldn’t be so sure. Interracial dating has been around for a good number of years and there is still a wide disparity, for example, between black/white couples and white/black couples. Why do you assume that the disparity would go away? Do you have any evidence besides your own wishes? See the above. Disparities have and always will exist, in some form. I didn’t say they would go away, but that it would lessen your concerns. My evidence? The amount of interracial couples in this country have only increased, not declined, and its not met with as much social opposition, as it has in previous years (where at one point, blacks/whites couldn’t marry by law). However, it’s a change which will only progress with each generation. > [@](#): > > If those children are also taught (and identify with) the culture and tradition of the dominant majority culture, it seems pretty likely that the minority culture will get assimilated out of existence pretty fast. If the culture gets assimilated, it will only exist in another form, as part of that majority culture. Culture changes, grows, and yes, some of it will inevitably be lost-- that’s an intrinsic link to our existence, which is just part of life. > [@](#): > > I don’t assume that at all. There is a difference between traditions which change and evolve over time and traditions which get assimilated out of existence. What’s the difference? Or better yet, what’s the \*significance \*of the difference? ---
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2012, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/162 "2012-11-30T22:32:19Z")
[This isn’t even the tumblr I was looking for.](http://heckyeaweloveinterracialcouples.tumblr.com/) ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2012, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/163 "2012-11-30T22:40:05Z")
> [@foolsguinea](#): > > [This isn’t even the tumblr I was looking for.](http://heckyeaweloveinterracialcouples.tumblr.com/) Well, now I’m starting to kind of not like interracial couples myself. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2012, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/164 "2012-11-30T23:02:39Z")
> [@Blackberry](#): > > Well, now I’m starting to kind of not like interracial couples myself. Yeah. And struggling a bit to identify the “inter” part of [this racial relationship](http://heckyeaweloveinterracialcouples.tumblr.com/post/36846427741/earthbeauties-miranda-and-andrew). ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2012, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/165 "2012-11-30T23:25:10Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > Yeah. And struggling a bit to identify the “inter” part of [this racial relationship](http://heckyeaweloveinterracialcouples.tumblr.com/post/36846427741/earthbeauties-miranda-and-andrew). White and super white. Imagine the stares they must get ☹ Kids these days take way too many fucking pictures of themselves, little self-absorbed bastards. ---
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/166 "2012-12-01T00:22:56Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > Yeah. And struggling a bit to identify the “inter” part of [this racial relationship](http://heckyeaweloveinterracialcouples.tumblr.com/post/36846427741/earthbeauties-miranda-and-andrew). He is pink and she is sallow, they are totally different colors! No, that one threw me too. I don’t know what the story is there. ---
**Author:** ![HazelNutCoffee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ac91a4/32.png) [@HazelNutCoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HazelNutCoffee)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/167 "2012-12-01T01:12:41Z")
I don’t see how interracial marriages lead to some kind of monolithic culture. I think many parents of such children want to make sure that their children grow up knowing both cultures - it’s not an either/or situation. I’ve met quite a few half-Korean people in Seoul who are living here for a few years because they are sincerely interested in connecting with that part of their background. And even if all the Koreans abroad were to marry people who weren’t Korean, Korea would still exist. Most Koreans in Korea marry other Koreans. I don’t see interracial marriage as a threat to Korean culture. I find this attitude of “we have to preserve our uniqueness” reprehensible. This is exactly the kind of attitude that makes life so difficult for biracial kids living in Korea, particularly those with Southeast Asian mothers. Nowadays many Korean men in rural areas marry mail-order brides because there aren’t enough Korean women (a result of a generation that preferred sons) and what Korean women there are do not want to live outside of the big cities. The children that these couples have are often shunned and bullied in Korean schools because the idea of “pure blood” is still so dominant. These biracial kids grow up in Korea and speak Korean just as well as any Korean child their age, but because they have a Southeast Asian mother they are looked down upon. It’s ignorant and sad. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/168 "2012-12-01T01:32:52Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > I don’t know about “SOO many people,” but I can believe it does happen. I can believe anything happens. It’s the “SOO many” aspect that has me all dubious! ---
**Author:** ![Love\_Rhombus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/love_rhombus/32/10694_2.png) [@Love\_Rhombus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Love_Rhombus)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/169 "2012-12-01T02:21:36Z")
I’m always happy to see 'em, I figure it breaks down the bigot blocks a little bit. Me, I’d be a little :dubious: just because I’d be unsure what kind of conflict I might be walking into, but my love life is so empty anyway it doesn’t matter. ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/170 "2012-12-01T03:31:29Z")
> [@Love\_Rhombus](#): > > I’m always happy to see 'em, I figure it breaks down the bigot blocks a little bit. Me, I’d be a little :dubious: just because I’d be unsure what kind of conflict I might be walking into, but my love life is so empty anyway it doesn’t matter. Your user name makes it sound like you have all kinds of things going on in your love life. I’ve never felt like race caused much conflict in any relationship I’ve been in, with the very notable exception of my current lunatic. He really does believe what he’s saying about me acting like a spoiled evil cracker blah blah blah, but I’m sure he didn’t get along much better with his past black girlfriends. I’d say the real problem here isn’t even really race, but that, not unlike all things I say, would definitely be some more white people shit. And to an extent it probably is. That’s what makes it hard, because there’s a degree of truth to what he says, but I can never figure out what it is. ---
**Author:** ![Glazer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a88e57/32.png) [@Glazer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Glazer)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/171 "2012-12-01T03:51:57Z")
> [@HazelNutCoffee](#): > > I find this attitude of “we have to preserve our uniqueness” reprehensible. This is exactly the kind of attitude that makes life so difficult for biracial kids living in Korea, particularly those with Southeast Asian mothers. Nowadays many Korean men in rural areas marry mail-order brides because there aren’t enough Korean women (a result of a generation that preferred sons) and what Korean women there are do not want to live outside of the big cities. The children that these couples have are often shunned and bullied in Korean schools because the idea of “pure blood” is still so dominant. These biracial kids grow up in Korea and speak Korean just as well as any Korean child their age, but because they have a Southeast Asian mother they are looked down upon. It’s ignorant and sad. I saw a lot of that when I was stationed there with half American kids, especially half black ones. My platoon supported an orphanage for unwanted half American kids. Often the Fathers would go back to the States and the Mother would have to give up their child in order to be accepted back home with their family. This was almost 30 years ago I had hoped things had gotten better. ---
**Author:** ![IceQube](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/dfb087/32.png) [@IceQube](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IceQube)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/172 "2012-12-01T04:11:20Z")
> [@foolsguinea](#): > > [This isn’t even the tumblr I was looking for.](http://heckyeaweloveinterracialcouples.tumblr.com/) _Sniff_ - I think I cried. In a good way :). Maybe in a 1000 years mankind will learn to accept each other despite phenotypic differences. ---
**Author:** ![IceQube](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/dfb087/32.png) [@IceQube](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IceQube)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/173 "2012-12-01T04:14:14Z")
Does anyone else see something odd in this picture? ![he makes me smile](https://64.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_me5x4tYt2C1r6emi8o1_1280.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/174 "2012-12-01T04:25:45Z")
When I see interacial couples, I think “Ebony…ivory…living in perfect harmony!” Lately I have been seeing more and more black women with white guys. This was something I used to never see. ---
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/175 "2012-12-01T05:24:01Z")
> [@IceQube](#): > > Does anyone else see something odd in this picture? > > [Interracial Lovers](http://heckyeaweloveinterracialcouples.tumblr.com/post/36810557355/blackguyswhitegirls-he-makes-me-smile) His untanned leg? Took me a bit to notice it. ---
**Author:** ![brazil84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8491ac/32.png) [@brazil84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brazil84)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/176 "2012-12-01T11:20:36Z")
> [@Krouget](#): > > That sounds more like a preference than an actual value, I’m not sure what the distinction is. Just like I would prefer that Polar Bears not be assimilated and disappear into the Brown Bear population, I prefer that distinctive minority groups not be assimilated and disappear into the dominant majority population. Especially my own (minority) group. Do you agree that it’s a common value (or preference if you will) among people who belong to distinctive minority groups that the group not me assimilated and disappear into the larger majority group? I’m not asking if you agree with it or not, I’m just asking if you understand that a lot of people hold this value (or preference if you will). > [@](#): > > You’re hinting at the intent behind two entirely different ideas, here. The answer to your first question, without going into too much detail, is no. The only relevant reason any distinction exists between the two in the first place, is clearly linked to the difference in environments they inhabit-- they have greater geological challenges than humans, for a host of different reasons. The second question lends to a strawman, and misaligns the natural tendency for any group to adapt and evolve-- no disrespect intended, but its a non-starter. I’m not sure what your point is here; it’s a simple question: Is it all the same to you if Polar Bears are assimilated and disappear as a distinct group? > [@](#): > > From the genetic level right on up to an individuals phenotype. The further you mix, the more genetic diversity there is. What you seem to be aiming for, is a quantitative separation of races, as related to their more distinctive physical traits (and possibly culture). This gets back to the original question, which asked why you saw value in this. Ok, so you agree that by your standard, the situation a few generations before Polar Bears are completely assimilated and disappear entails more “actual diversity” then the starting situation where Polar Bears and Brown Bears are distinct groups. Right? > [@](#): > > nothing renders a person of another race “unsuitable”, meaning the only other barrier exist as a mental construct, be it in the form of indoctrination, culture, or otherwise So you are confident that there are no in-born sexual preferences? For example, with the right form of social conditioning, girls would prefer short men to tall men; poor men to rich men; and fat slobs to athletes? > [@](#): > > The amount of interracial couples in this country have only increased, Ok, so you have no evidence whatsoever concerning a change in the disparity between black/white and white/black couples? And no evidence whatsoever concerning a change in the disparity between white/Asian and Asian/white couples? i.e. you have no evidence besides your own wishes and desires? > [@](#): > > If the culture gets assimilated, it will only exist in another form, as part of that majority culture. Whereas if the minority culture does NOT get assimilated, it will continue to exist as a distinct minority culture. As a member of a minority group, I prefer the latter situation. Which is undermined by inter-marriage. > [@](#): > > What’s the difference? Or better yet, what’s the \*significance \*of the difference? I prefer the latter situation. Let me ask you this: Do you do anything in life to promote the preservation of anything? If so, why do you do it? You do realize, don’t you, that whatever thing it is you are trying to preserve will eventually disappear or change beyond recognition. ---
**Author:** ![brazil84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8491ac/32.png) [@brazil84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brazil84)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 11:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/177 "2012-12-01T11:28:26Z")
> [@HazelNutCoffee](#): > > I don’t see how interracial marriages lead to some kind of monolithic culture. I think many parents of such children want to make sure that their children grow up knowing both cultures - it’s not an either/or situation. I disagree. Let’s suppose a child grows up with knowledge of and identification with 2 cultures, or religions, or whatever, and one is the dominant majority culture and one is the minority culture, how important will it be to that child that his own children learn and identify with the minority group? Probably less important than it was to his own parent who was a member of that group. So it’s easy to see how knowledge of and identification with the minority group can be diluted and disappear after a few generations. > [@](#): > > I find this attitude of “we have to preserve our uniqueness” reprehensible. You are of course, entitled to your opinion. I do agree that opposition to inter-marriage causes a lot of unpleasantness. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/178 "2012-12-01T13:51:03Z")
Hell, now that I think of it, I’m in a mixed-racial relationship myself. After all, I’m an Ashkenzic Jew, with roots in Poland, Lithuania and the Ukraine; my wife is Sephardic, with her family hailing from Bulgaria and Greece. Sure, we may not look very different (my wife is a bit darker than me, but if we were American we’d both be thought of as “white”), but genetically, our ancestors did’t have much contact over the past 1,000 years. And it’s not just me: my sister is married to an Algerian Jew, one who actually _looks_ North African. Our kids, incidentally, are beautiful. We define them as “Israeli Jews”. ---
**Author:** ![smokey78](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@smokey78](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smokey78)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/179 "2012-12-01T13:58:01Z")
We are all going to be blended. I recall reading a bio of Queen Victoria and how she was concerned about her family marrying lookalikes and ending up with the same color hair,eyes, etc. with no diversity. And the fact that they were marrying familial relations. Wait a sec did her hemophiliac gene eventually die out with passing generations? anyways recently I saw two interracial couples on the covers of Money Magazine. I thought it was of note as I had never seen that before. I cannot speak for the entire Hispanic population, but did they used to be strict about being with other races? I watched the chunky soup ads with Victor Cruz and his Latina mother and grandmother and I thought oh I thought he was black, but he is half black. Also Arian Foster I had no idea his mom is Latina. And mark Paul Gosselear I had no idea he had a Filipino mom! ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2012, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331/180 "2012-12-01T13:58:30Z")
> [@brazil84](#): > > I disagree. Let’s suppose a child grows up with knowledge of and identification with 2 cultures, or religions, or whatever, and one is the dominant majority culture and one is the minority culture, how important will it be to that child that his own children learn and identify with the minority group? Probably less important than it was to his own parent who was a member of that group. So it’s easy to see how knowledge of and identification with the minority group can be diluted and disappear after a few generations. I actually identify with my “minority culture” half a bit more than my “majority culture” half. I think this is true with a lot of “mixed culture” people. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-interracial-couples/642331.md?page=10)