# What do you think of my new pick up line? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 9, 2012, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278 "2012-02-09T05:18:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2012, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/41 "2012-02-10T03:48:05Z")
> [@BrotherCadfael](#): > > The famous line employed by Ezekiel Bradbury Marston, III: “Me lay, you lay?” > (anyone recognize the reference?) Yes. Still popular in Korea and the Penobscot region. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2012, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/42 "2012-02-10T03:57:32Z")
Humm. Both lines seem much more sophisticated than mine. “Are you as desperate as me?” ---
**Author:** ![Arrendajo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Arrendajo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arrendajo)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2012, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/43 "2012-02-10T06:49:57Z")
> [@jjimm](#): > > It looks like a more minimalist version of my ‘caveman’ line: > > Man. Woman. Jiggy-jig. Make baby. Now that is pure genius. If it’s not copyrighted, I’d like to try it out. > [@Slithy\_Tove](#): > > Yes, even this thread can be [Godwinized.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNrN2Dkgpgc) OMG stop before I spit more coffee on my monitor. > [@SmellMyWort](#): > > I’m not sure I’d want a lady thinking about a maggot and my wang at the same time. You might be on to something there… > [@Barrett\_Bonden](#): > > Am I the only one who liked the old pick up line better? I still think the old line had a lot of potential; great imagery and sophisication. I’m going to keep it in reserve in case the new one doesn’t work out so well. > [@don\_t\_ask](#): > > I wait until I notice a woman checking me out and then yell at her, “What the fuck are you looking at?” > > No real success yet. Keep trying. Practice in front of the mirror. Delivery is really important in these first impression situations. > [@Onomatopoeia](#): > > Is this a joke thread that everyone’s in on except me? How does denigrating and treating someone you just met like a castaway human sperm receptacle ever work? castaway human sperm receptacle… I like the sound of that. I’ll bet I could build a good pick up line around that. > [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > I never found pickup lines necessary. Indeed, they’re all rather crude. Me, I just used to look longingly at the lady and lick my eyebrows. Damn! I am going to quit trimming my eyebrows. ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2012, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/44 "2012-02-10T08:04:19Z")
> [@don\_t\_ask](#): > > I wait until I notice a woman checking me out and then yell at her, “What the fuck are you looking at?” > > No real success yet. You could try changing that up to “want to fuck what you’re looking at?” I had a guy who was all proud of himself about a job he had just gotten, and how much money he was making, and popped off with, “Just try to point out who could be making more money than me in here.” I pointed at the bartender (who was a co-owner of the crazy successful bar I had patronized for years at that point) and said, “Well, him, for starters. He’s a millionaire.” Douche moved on. One of my favorites, “Well, hellooo sweet cheeks!” ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2012, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/45 "2012-02-10T17:26:55Z")
> [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](#): > > I guess sexual assault is _kind of_ a pickup line. A mate of mine met his wife that way, but perhaps folks were less uptight in the late 1970s. ---
**Author:** ![YoDoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/e68b1a/32.png) [@YoDoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YoDoc)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2012, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/46 "2012-02-11T14:36:13Z")
I met my wife when I beat the shit out of her boyfriend at a party. Now, to be fair, that wasn’t the first, or last time that guy and I got in a fight. ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2012, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/47 "2012-02-12T16:57:05Z")
> [@Onomatopoeia](#): > > Is this a joke thread that everyone’s in on except me? How does denigrating and treating someone you just met like a castaway human sperm receptacle ever work? Those are both really horrible pickup lines. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2012, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/48 "2012-02-13T16:27:53Z")
> [@Onomatopoeia](#): > > Is this a joke thread that everyone’s in on except me? How does denigrating and treating someone you just met like a castaway human sperm receptacle ever work? > [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > Those are both really horrible pickup lines. I dunno. Made me feel kind of frisky. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2012, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/49 "2012-02-13T16:48:35Z")
“I may not be much to look at, but I don’t see any other guys looking to talk to you.” ---
**Author:** ![Trom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@Trom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trom)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2012, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/50 "2012-02-13T16:54:38Z")
Don’t be so quick to abandon your insect angle: “Baby, you look so sweet, I bet you’re covered in ants…” ---
**Author:** ![Onomatopoeia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/onomatopoeia/32/4145_2.png) [@Onomatopoeia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Onomatopoeia)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2012, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/51 "2012-02-13T17:13:32Z")
> [@Onomatopoeia](#): > > Is this a joke thread that everyone’s in on except me? How does denigrating and treating someone you just met like a castaway human sperm receptacle ever work? > [@Covered\_In\_Bees](#): > > Your sense of humor is broken. You’re probably right, although I’ve never used a pick-up line and can’t imagine ever doing so, if I weren’t already married that is, without erupting in a fit of laughter. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2012, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/52 "2012-02-13T18:15:59Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > I dunno. Made me feel kind of frisky. There’s a joke in there about Thai lady boys, but I got nothin’. ---
**Author:** ![Gagundathar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gagundathar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gagundathar)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2012, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/53 "2012-02-13T18:20:45Z")
So, it is Monday. How well did your new pickup line work this weekend? Experimentation and documentation are the workhorses of the scientific method. We need to know. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/54 "2012-02-14T03:27:38Z")
I’ve heard it said in all seriousness that if you just walk up to women and ask “Wanna fuck?”, you’ll get at least one or two takers out of every hundred, assuming you’ve not been arrested long before. Has anyone ever researched this in the field? ---
**Author:** ![MEBuckner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mebuckner/32/2896_2.png) [@MEBuckner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MEBuckner)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 10:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/55 "2012-02-14T10:30:43Z")
> [@Onomatopoeia](#): > > Is this a joke thread that everyone’s in on except me? How does denigrating and treating someone you just met like a castaway human sperm receptacle ever work? > [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > Those are both really horrible pickup lines. I could see the second one working if you’re trying to pick up the sort of women who insist on spelling it “womyn”. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 10:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/56 "2012-02-14T10:50:06Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > I’ve heard it said in all seriousness that if you just walk up to women and ask “Wanna fuck?”, you’ll get at least one or two takers out of every hundred, assuming you’ve not been arrested long before. Has anyone ever researched this in the field? Michael Green, _The Art of Coarse Sex_, paraphrased: “…and yes, I know the stories about the men who try this and get slapped a lot but also get laid a lot, but the only man I ever knew who actually tried this was suffering from a personality disorder and the few times a woman actually said yes he ran away in a panic. Eventually he was arrested after exposing himself to a woman at a dance…”. I once sidled up to a girl in a crowded pub and kibitzed on the cribbage game she was playing with one of the regulars. When I stroked her bum (it was standing room only) she responded in kind, and while no actual proposition was made we went for a curry afterwards, then back to her student bedsit where ugly-bumping occurred a little later. But that was just a one-off and I wouldn’t say I recommended it on general principle. ---
**Author:** ![Trom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@Trom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trom)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/57 "2012-02-14T15:59:15Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > I’ve heard it said in all seriousness that if you just walk up to women and ask “Wanna fuck?”, you’ll get at least one or two takers out of every hundred, assuming you’ve not been arrested long before. Has anyone ever researched this in the field? In [Surely You’re Joking, Mr. Feynman!](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surely_You%27re_Joking,_Mr._Feynman!), Richard Feynman mentions he tried a very similar tactic. It wasn’t quite as blunt as, “Hey, wanna fuck?” But, it was pretty close. And he had decent success. ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/58 "2012-02-14T16:03:56Z")
> [@Trom](#): > > In [Surely You’re Joking, Mr. Feynman!](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surely_You%27re_Joking,_Mr._Feynman!), Richard Feynman mentions he tried a very similar tactic. It wasn’t quite as blunt as, “Hey, wanna fuck?” But, it was pretty close. And he had decent success. Nah, he just turned around the “Can I buy you a drink?” pick-up line to the “Buy me a drink” pick up line. PUAs have been creaming over it ever since. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/59 "2012-02-14T17:15:33Z")
“You don’t sweat much, for fat girl.” ---
**Author:** ![Trom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@Trom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trom)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278/60 "2012-02-14T18:08:36Z")
> [@Isamu](#): > > Nah, he just turned around the “Can I buy you a drink?” pick-up line to the “Buy me a drink” pick up line. PUAs have been creaming over it ever since. Wasn’t it a little more aggressive than that? I guess I don’t remember it clearly. I thought he did something more along the lines of Professor Nash in A Beautiful Mind: > [@](#): > > Nash: I find you attractive. Your aggressive moves toward me… indicate that you feel the same way. But still, ritual requires that we continue with a number of platonic activities… before we have sex. I am proceeding with these activities, but in point of actual fact, all I really want to do is have intercourse with you as soon as possible. > > [pause] > > Nash: Are you gonna slap me now? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-of-my-new-pick-up-line/612278.md?page=4)