# What do you think the "H" stands for in Jesus H. Christ? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 6, 2003, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766 "2003-11-06T20:33:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Omnipresent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8c91f0/32.png) [@Omnipresent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omnipresent)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/1 "2003-11-06T20:33:03Z")
Seriously. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/2 "2003-11-06T20:34:51Z")
Haploid. Seriously. ---
**Author:** ![London\_Calling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@London\_Calling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/London_Calling)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/3 "2003-11-06T20:36:13Z")
Humphrey ? Hannibal ? Halitosis? ---
**Author:** ![Omnipresent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8c91f0/32.png) [@Omnipresent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omnipresent)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/4 "2003-11-06T20:46:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by silenus \* > \*\*Haploid. > Seriously. \*\* Really? ---
**Author:** ![dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dorkusmalorkusmafia/32/7266_2.png) [@dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dorkusmalorkusmafia)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/5 "2003-11-06T21:04:16Z")
Haploid! Great answer! It means that he only had one set of chromosomes which is in direct opposition for sexual life. If I remember my college biology only asexual creatures can be haploid. I don’t have anything further to add. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/6 "2003-11-06T21:17:49Z")
Halosporting ---
**Author:** ![Moo\_the\_Magic\_Cow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ebca7d/32.png) [@Moo\_the\_Magic\_Cow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moo_the_Magic_Cow)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/7 "2003-11-06T21:25:38Z")
Horatio ---
**Author:** ![LifeOnWry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/96bed5/32.png) [@LifeOnWry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LifeOnWry)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/8 "2003-11-06T21:30:31Z")
Howard, after his Dad. You know, Our Father Howard in heaven… ---
**Author:** ![liirogue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dbc845/32.png) [@liirogue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/liirogue)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/9 "2003-11-06T21:34:00Z")
I had a black friend tell me once that it stook for “honkey” (or however you spell it) 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/10 "2003-11-06T21:34:34Z")
According to [this](http://www.geocities.com/church_of_hank/) parody website and group, it stands for Hank. ---
**Author:** ![Omnipresent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8c91f0/32.png) [@Omnipresent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omnipresent)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/11 "2003-11-06T21:48:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by LifeOnWry \* > \*\*Howard, after his Dad. > > You know, Our Father Howard in heaven… \*\* THAT is fucking priceless. Top notch!!! ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/12 "2003-11-06T21:56:45Z")
Nah, it stands for Hallmark, 'cuz God cared enough to send the very best. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/13 "2003-11-06T22:32:11Z")
I was going to post something smartass, but after Howard and Hallmark, anything I was going to post just sounds lame now … Good ones, guys! ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/14 "2003-11-06T22:40:15Z")
Hashimoto ---
**Author:** ![Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helen_s_Eidolon)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2003, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/15 "2003-11-07T01:00:50Z")
The master did a [column](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a1_033.html) on this. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2003, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/16 "2003-11-07T04:56:14Z")
Harold As in “Harold be thy name.” ---
**Author:** ![j666](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de0a6/32.png) [@j666](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/j666)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2003, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/17 "2003-11-07T05:17:31Z")
holy ---
**Author:** ![SanguineSpider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@SanguineSpider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanguineSpider)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2003, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/18 "2003-11-07T06:20:01Z")
“Happy” “Hound Dog” as in Jesus “Hound Dog” Christ for the blues band he jams with Friday nights. I wonder who really knows the answer. ---
**Author:** ![3trew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/3/13edae/32.png) [@3trew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/3trew)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2003, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/19 "2003-11-07T06:23:33Z")
This is less of a puzzle to me than the identity of “Round John Virgin” from the well known Christmas carol. ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2003, 10:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766/20 "2003-11-07T10:51:24Z")
Hweertdydasbbfmfisuudhjqwvxxtyhfiusoplgflvmkndhu. Pronounced as “Bob”. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-think-the-h-stands-for-in-jesus-h-christ/211766.md?page=2)