# What Do Your Pets Call You? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 10, 2003, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837 "2003-09-10T20:36:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/1 "2003-09-10T20:36:48Z")
We all have names for our pets, including some very [strange things](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=72264) we sometimes say to them. Have you ever speculated as to what your pet calls you in its own mind? I thought about this the other day and arrived at the conclusion that Piewacket the cat most definitely has a name for me. He uses it all of the time. I believe is goes something like this: _ **HEY, YOU WITH THE FOOD!** _ With Zen, my wolf hybrid, it is entirely a different matter. He worships the ground I walk on and I am of the opinion that no finer animal has been born to the face of this earth (with the minor possible exception of his deceased predecessor, Bear Dog). With Zen, there can be no doubt that I am referred to as the: _ **STROKEMEISTER** _ He has been so well behaved over last few years that our typical interaction consists of me giving him massive amounts of strokes and petting for doing his job so well. He guards the house, harasses the cat on command and generally keeps himself out of trouble. It’s hard to ask more of any animal that voluntarily gives the cat grief upon request. Even more hilarious is watching Piewacket come right up to Zen and rub his face against Zen’s snout. The two are very attached to each other, but I’m still glad that Zen is willing to let Piewacket know that his are not the keys to the kingdom. So, what do your pets call you? ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/2 "2003-09-10T20:44:29Z")
Kibblegiver She must also just wonder at humans always changing their fur, and the strange hobby of collecting catshit in small bags. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/3 "2003-09-10T20:45:10Z")
My kitties all call me Mom or Mommy. But two of them call Mr. Kalhoun “Dad” and one calls him by his last name. I’m certain. ---
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/4 "2003-09-10T20:48:25Z")
Boss ---
**Author:** ![troub](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troub/32/14802_2.png) [@troub](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/troub)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/5 "2003-09-10T20:50:06Z")
Weimaraners, known (at least amongst Weim owners) for their strange half-howly/grumbly vocalizations, actually do talk. Mine calls me rwoo-ROO-roo-roo. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/6 "2003-09-10T20:57:16Z")
I’m sure that Annie, one of our cats, calls me “Hey You With The Food,” too. She’s pretty insistent at times, which is why I think that’s what she’s calling me, although I prefer to think she’s really calling me “Wonderful and Great Provider of All that is Tasty and Good.” Hey, I can dream, can’t I? I think that Denver, our oldest cat, prefers to call me something like, “Master Masseur.” The only times he says anything to me, he wants a full-body massage. And he usually gets one. Shiloh is our youngest cat. The only time she ever speaks is when somebody picks her up, which she hates. At that point, she lets loose with a stream of meeping–she has yet to produce a full-throated “meow,” and “meeps” are the most she seems to be willing to do. But the meeping tells me that to Shiloh, I’m probably known as “That @#$% Who Keeps Picking Me Up.” ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/7 "2003-09-10T21:22:29Z")
Woof and meow… ---
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/8 "2003-09-10T21:22:29Z")
**Spoons** , while preparing this thread, I needed to check the link and couldn’t help but start reading some of the wonderful replies concerning the wacky things people here call their pets. I recently saw your thread about Frisco’s passing and was brought up short when I stumbled across your post in the earlier thread (two years ago, almost to the day). I’m going to place it here in loving memory of your little buddy. I hope you do not mind my doing so. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Spoons \* > We have three cats, **San Francisco** who is most often called **Frisco** , **Denver** , and **Annie**. Frisco has white paws so his pads are pink, Denver is all black including his pads, and Annie is all gray, so her pads are a gray-purpley colour. They all know their names, so if we want to talk about them without them knowing, my wife and I fall back on the names “Pink Pads” for Frisco, “Ink Pads” for Denver, and “Purple Pads” for Annie. > > Of course, we use other names for them too. If Frisco has misbehaved somehow, we find that we act like parents and sternly use his full name: “San Francisco!” He understands the message pretty well. Denver is much better behaved, and sometimes gets called simply, “Denny.” Annie can be a handful, but since we can’t do much with her name, my wife came up with the idea of making her sound like some 1950s-era TV show. I’ll hear some accident in another room, and my wife exclaiming in a June-Cleaver voice, “Oh That Annie!” I keep expecting to hear a laugh track following. ---
**Author:** ![fizzygoodmakefeelnice](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8491ac/32.png) [@fizzygoodmakefeelnice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fizzygoodmakefeelnice)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/9 "2003-09-10T21:32:17Z")
My birds call me **ACK ACK ACK ACK ACK ACK ACK!** ---
**Author:** ![Q.N.Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/3da27b/32.png) [@Q.N.Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.N.Jones)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/10 "2003-09-10T21:45:19Z")
“That Crazy Lady.” What else would you call a woman who is always singing strange, made-up, rambling songs about you and who picks you up and blows raspberries on your tummy for no apparent reason? ---
**Author:** ![JavaMaven1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/cab0a1/32.png) [@JavaMaven1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JavaMaven1)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/11 "2003-09-10T21:57:13Z")
The Cookie Human (since I’m the one who keeps the treats). ---
**Author:** ![look\_hergo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85e7bf/32.png) [@look\_hergo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/look_hergo)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/12 "2003-09-10T22:04:47Z")
Our cats call us “Food Lady” and “Yelling Man”. (Get off the desk! Why’s my shirt covered in hair! Stop scratching the screen door!) ---
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/13 "2003-09-10T22:26:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Q.N. Jones \* > What else would you call a woman who is always singing strange, made-up, rambling songs about you and who picks you up and blows raspberries on your tummy for no apparent reason? I’d call her “sweetheart,” but only after the first date. ---
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/14 "2003-09-10T22:34:13Z")
Welcome aboard(s), **look@hergo!** Say hello to those Artesians for me. ---
**Author:** ![Peg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b38774/32.png) [@Peg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peg)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/15 "2003-09-10T22:41:58Z")
“Mao” Not the deceased Chinese leader, but that’s the noise she makes. Not “meow” but “mao.” ---
**Author:** ![Q.N.Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/3da27b/32.png) [@Q.N.Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.N.Jones)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/16 "2003-09-10T22:46:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Zenster \* > \*\*I’d call her “sweetheart,” but only after the first date. \*\* 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Boods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5e9695/32.png) [@Ms\_Boods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Boods)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/17 "2003-09-11T00:06:49Z")
One of my dogs, called Praxiteles, will let out this happy howl when she’s glad to see me or is just being silly and wants attention away from the other dogs, and I’ve trained her to say, rather clearly, ‘Haarrooolllld,’ which is my partner’s second name. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/18 "2003-09-11T00:11:56Z")
**Zenster** , thank you. No, I don’t mind at all. I’d forgotten about that thread, and rereading that post made me laugh. Something I needed to do. Problem was, the smoke from my cigar got in my eyes while I read it, and it became hard to see. (Yes, that’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it.) But I made it through. Seriously, thanks for reposting that. And thank you for the nice thoughts in my other recent thread. They meant a great deal to Spoonette and myself. ---
**Author:** ![Blonde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Blonde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blonde)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/19 "2003-09-11T00:38:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dinsdale \* > \*\*Boss \*\* Oh, that’s good! They’re rolling their eyes as they say it, right? 😛 I guess I’m “mommy” - and our littlest, a 4-month Siamese mutt, has to call my 8-year old son “best friend,” as they are inseparable. I’ve never seen a cat so in love with a human, and am quite jealous. ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837/20 "2003-09-11T01:19:57Z")
He must think I’m a ball player, because he calls me “Ruth! Ruth!” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-your-pets-call-you/200837.md?page=2)