# What does "high maintenance woman" mean to you? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 14, 2003, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-high-maintenance-woman-mean-to-you/213333 "2003-11-14T22:55:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2003, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-high-maintenance-woman-mean-to-you/213333/21 "2003-11-15T15:59:43Z")
Actually, there is a species that’s worse: Self Maintaining. I was previously engaged to a trust fund baby who had the nerver to say: “You know, I’m only sticking around with you for companionship.” Which means: “You know, when your companionship isn’t enough, I see no reason to keep you around.” The funny thing is, the NEXT girl I dated (and subsequently married) didn’t need ANY of the work in the areas that made the previous relationship so hard to keep up. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2003, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-high-maintenance-woman-mean-to-you/213333/22 "2003-11-15T17:18:25Z")
**Blank** , I’m not sure I see what’s so horrible about that. Companionship ought to be a pretty major part of the relationship. It certainly sounds better than being kept around for your wallet or because the sex is good. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2003, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-high-maintenance-woman-mean-to-you/213333/23 "2003-11-15T18:10:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by IUHomer \* > \*\* > Monica on Friends, she is high maintenance. She isn’t necessarily very materialisitc, though. \*\* Yes, but Chandler doesn’t mind, because he’s the one maintaining her. I read a line in a book about a woman secure in herself, who did not need to burden her mate with herself. In other words, a high maintence woman is someone who cannot maintain herself, and seeks help from outside. ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2003, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-high-maintenance-woman-mean-to-you/213333/24 "2003-11-15T18:18:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CrazyCatLady \* > \*\ ***Blank** , I’m not sure I see what’s so horrible about that. Companionship ought to be a pretty major part of the relationship. It certainly sounds better than being kept around for your wallet or because the sex is good. \*\* You fail to realize the thrust of the comment. It was directed as a veiled threat. I agree that companionship is key, but the other aspects of a relationship (financial need, ties to children, the fact you two can do better than one in life) really help a relationship through hard times. The statement was that I was pretty much the whipping boy. If I didn’t measure up, there was nothing keeping her in the relationship. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2003, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-high-maintenance-woman-mean-to-you/213333/25 "2003-11-15T18:30:22Z")
So…you’re saying that it’s better for someone to know you’re only staying with them because you can’t afford to live on your own, or because of the kids, than to tell them you’re only staying with them because you enjoy their company? If I’m understanding what you’re getting at, that’s really fucked up. If I’m misunderstanding, please explain it to me. ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2003, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-high-maintenance-woman-mean-to-you/213333/26 "2003-11-15T18:37:41Z")
Ummm no. Picture it as the difference between getting married and living together. In one situation you’ve got a much bigger incentive to work things out, in the other, you pull the ripcord the minute your relationship doesn’t measure up to whatever fantasy you’ve got in mind. What you’re NOT seeing is: the Woman was a bi-polar individual with some SERIOUS issues. Misunderstand all you want, I was VERY offended when she said it. ---
**Author:** ![Tusculan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecd19e/32.png) [@Tusculan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tusculan)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2003, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-high-maintenance-woman-mean-to-you/213333/27 "2003-11-15T21:54:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by whistlepig \* > \*\*That’s the worst kind. A high maintenance woman who thinks she’s low maintenance. \*\* Isn’t this a 'When Harry met Sally" quote? ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2003, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-high-maintenance-woman-mean-to-you/213333/28 "2003-11-15T22:33:56Z")
It’s like a high maintenance yard, lots of watering, pruning, fertilizing & attention needed 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Susanann](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7ab992/32.png) [@Susanann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Susanann)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2003, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-high-maintenance-woman-mean-to-you/213333/29 "2003-11-16T12:23:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Casey1505 \* > \*\*It means there’s no way in hell she’ll ever sleep with me. \*\* So you only date/pick up women who dont wear any makeup, are out of shape, who dont shave, dont wear perfume, dont have/wear a variety of nice clothes, who have unkept short nails, and who dont do anything with hair? ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2003, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-high-maintenance-woman-mean-to-you/213333/30 "2003-11-16T21:52:10Z")
I’ll never forget this. This happened many years ago. One of my brothers girlfriends asked to be carried to the car because there was a bit of snow on the ground. ………She didn’t want to get her new boots wet. Bullet, dodged. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-high-maintenance-woman-mean-to-you/213333.md?page=1)