# What does Microsoft think your user name should be? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 20, 2000, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809 "2000-09-20T01:40:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![KimKatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ac91a4/32.png) [@KimKatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KimKatt)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/1 "2000-09-20T01:40:34Z")
I just composed and sent an email to Hamadryad. I have my email set to automatically spell check all messages prior to sending, as I am a lousy typist. When the spellchecker got to my username, it suggested that I change it too… **Kumquat**. I’m mortified. _Kumquat???_ :o ---
**Author:** ![brachyrhynchos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brachyrhynchos/32/376_2.png) [@brachyrhynchos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brachyrhynchos)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/2 "2000-09-20T01:55:42Z")
My computer froze up. Not really. It just had no suggestion for “brachyrhynchos.” I thought it might suggest brachycentrum, brachycardia, or even brachy therapy, but no go. ---
**Author:** ![MadPoet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8c91f0/32.png) [@MadPoet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MadPoet)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/3 "2000-09-20T02:17:35Z")
Just doesn’t like my spacing is all… ---
**Author:** ![Demo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demo/32/8472_2.png) [@Demo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Demo)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/4 "2000-09-20T03:44:04Z")
I lost MS Office when I reformatted my HD yesterday. I have to bootleg a new copy… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Emperor\_Penguin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c2a13f/32.png) [@Emperor\_Penguin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emperor_Penguin)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/5 "2000-09-20T03:55:25Z")
Mine suggest corpus. Here’s a pleasant little diversion. In all my years of hearing the word kumquat, Ihave no freakin’ clue as to what it actually is, save for the fact that it may be a type of fruit. ---
**Author:** ![Broken\_Doll](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbce88/32.png) [@Broken\_Doll](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broken_Doll)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/6 "2000-09-20T03:57:32Z")
It is a type of fruit. ---
**Author:** ![DVous\_Means](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9fc29f/32.png) [@DVous\_Means](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DVous_Means)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/7 "2000-09-20T04:00:45Z")
Given that I have “borrowed” Uncle Bill’s software on occasion (just to check it out, honest 😉 ), Microsoft will probably want to call me “Thief”… ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/8 "2000-09-20T04:07:51Z")
Well, my MS Word has either figured out that Kyla is my name, or I added it to the dictionary, or something, because it was first on a list of words that came up when I spellchecked it. Some other selections from the list: chili, Chile, kola, Kailua, killer, and Ky. (As in the abbreviation for Kentucky.) ---
**Author:** ![dpr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8797f3/32.png) [@dpr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dpr)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/9 "2000-09-20T04:14:48Z")
Mine came up with dur, dry (no Bard mentions), dory, dip or - would you believe it - \*\* doper. \*\* ---
**Author:** ![kiffa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/d78d45/32.png) [@kiffa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kiffa)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/10 "2000-09-20T05:03:35Z")
knife or kA [what element is that?] ---
**Author:** ![kiffa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/d78d45/32.png) [@kiffa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kiffa)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/11 "2000-09-20T05:07:19Z")
Couldn’t find kA on the chemical elements list… is there another place to look? Now why didn’t spellcheck say “ka” the spiritual part of an individual believed by ancient Egyptians to survive the body after death?? ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/12 "2000-09-20T05:12:41Z")
kiloAmpere? –sublight. ---
**Author:** ![tatertot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c37758/32.png) [@tatertot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tatertot)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 7:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/13 "2000-09-20T07:32:53Z")
It got my real name right, but it didn’t want to accept tatertot. Very odd, I thought that was a real word. It suggested: Tate tot (which is how I got my UN in the first place) tatter watertight state room tatters attested and: waterdog. WTF? ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/14 "2000-09-20T07:36:11Z")
Every spellcheck I’ve run across says I should replace “SPOOFE” with “Horse-hung sex-master”. And, you know what, I’m often tempted to take that suggestion, but “SPOOFE” says it all in less syllables. ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 9:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/15 "2000-09-20T09:46:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Kyla \* > \*\*Kailua, \*\* Really? Kailua, Hawaii? Neat. Must be a programmer on staff at MS from there or something. I don’t use Word, but my spellchecker renders: Derek, Adored :D, Adroit, Hydrate, Augured, Agreed, Darkly, Turkey, Dread, and Adhered. Very weird. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 11:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/16 "2000-09-20T11:18:14Z")
It suggests **SPOKE** , fer chrissakes! ---
**Author:** ![CnoteChris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/278dde/32.png) [@CnoteChris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CnoteChris)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/17 "2000-09-20T11:45:35Z")
:: Sniff :: Mine simply said… ‘Chris’. ---
**Author:** ![mblackwell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5fc32e/32.png) [@mblackwell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mblackwell)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/18 "2000-09-20T12:00:32Z")
Don’t feel bad, Chris. Mine just suggests Blackwell. ---
**Author:** ![Zumba\_The\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/779978/32.png) [@Zumba\_The\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zumba_The_Cat)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/19 "2000-09-20T12:29:43Z")
Mine suggested Rumba, Zambia and Zombie as possible replacements for Zumba. I think that I am going to stick with Zumba, although Zombie The Cat does sound interesting. ---
**Author:** ![tubagirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b77776/32.png) [@tubagirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tubagirl)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2000, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809/20 "2000-09-20T13:35:45Z")
At least you guys get suggestions!!! Mine says (no suggestions) :(:(☹ [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-microsoft-think-your-user-name-should-be/33809.md?page=2)