# What does the bisexual community want us to know? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 30, 2014, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-the-bisexual-community-want-us-to-know/684918 "2014-03-30T17:46:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-the-bisexual-community-want-us-to-know/684918/61 "2014-04-01T19:49:13Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > You’re asking me to fight your ignorance about what bisexuals want and need? Start your own thread. That’s absurd. I didn’t ask you to fight my ignorance about what bisexuals want and need. I asked you to cite your own highly dubious claims about bisexuals. Your failure to do so speaks pretty clearly as to the veracity of your claims, though, so I figure you’ve satisfied whatever curiosity I had on the subject. edit: “the subject” being of course the veracity of your claims. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-the-bisexual-community-want-us-to-know/684918/62 "2014-04-01T21:16:32Z")
I still don’t get why you’d be upset about science trying to prove you exist if there are people out there that don’t believe you exist. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-the-bisexual-community-want-us-to-know/684918/63 "2014-04-01T21:35:44Z")
> [@pbbth](#): > > At least he thinks he stays away from us. I dated lots of guys for short periods of time who I never discussed my sexuality with in that much depth. If he dated much at all before getting married he has probably dated at least one bisexual woman and not known it. Especially women, who seem to be less binary generally speaking. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-the-bisexual-community-want-us-to-know/684918/64 "2014-04-01T21:52:23Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > Especially women, who seem to be less binary generally speaking. Seems that there are a lot of bi guys that don’t want to admit it to themselves or anyone else. There are tons of guys that have sex with other guys but still describe themselves as ‘completely straight’. I had one tell me that he’s straight but wants to get fucked by other guys and described liking penises as his fetish. ---
**Author:** ![typoink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecb155/32.png) [@typoink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/typoink)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-the-bisexual-community-want-us-to-know/684918/65 "2014-04-02T00:44:04Z")
Personally, the hardest thing I’ve experienced is a real lack of community, identity, and support. While bisexuals aren’t specifically ostracized by mainstream gay culture, there’s distance. It’s seemed to me like people that come out as gay tend to get brought in to a supportive culture, that’s much less true for bisexuals. It’s not a conspiracy, but bisexuality being a sort of “neutral” stance seems to make it tougher to really build community. I’ve found a little more support and kinship from the broader queer community, but as a sorta-clean-cut young white male, it’s…well, it’s hard to feel more invisible or boring around many/most self-identified queer folks. ---
**Author:** ![Crawlspace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Crawlspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crawlspace)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-the-bisexual-community-want-us-to-know/684918/66 "2014-04-02T05:23:57Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > It’s getting better, and it’s better than for bisexuals. I’m eager to see the data you have to back this up. I’ve searched PubMed an UpToDate and couldn’t find any studies on the matter that separate out bisexuals from the gay/lesbian population. > [@levdrakon](#): > > It’s just a WAG. Why are bisexuals lagging behind the progress gays have made? I’m not aware of any provisions exempting bisexuals from the progress made by the Gay Lesbian and Bisexual community. > [@levdrakon](#): > > I hear complaints they want acceptance. I’m not seeing a special lack of acceptance Ironically, the only area where bisexuals are clearly trailing homosexuals (aside from Kinsey rating) is in [acceptance](http://www.cbsnews.com/news/15-percent-of-people-dont-think-bisexuality-is-real-sexual-orientation-study/). > [@levdrakon](#): > > Maybe they’re just unhappy that non-bi’s don’t want to have sex with them or fall in love and marry them. I see that as their problem. I’ll be sure to let the others know you’ve identified the cause. The search for the problems shall commence after considerable equivocating. ---
**Author:** ![shy\_kat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/59ef9b/32.png) [@shy\_kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shy_kat)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-the-bisexual-community-want-us-to-know/684918/67 "2014-04-02T17:12:07Z")
The real problem is that we are invisible. I am bi, with a moderate preference for women. When (as At the moment), I have a female partner, everyone (gay and straight) reads me as gay. This included my friends, who I have repeatedly told otherwise. They just kinda forget. If I have a male partner, I read as straight to everyone (or possibly as “fake pseudo bi”). This is both somewhat annoying personally and creates problems for the community (such as the phenomenon that someone mentioned of people saying that they don’t know any bisexuals). Also, > [@](#): > > And this makes me wonder about bisexuals: are they attracted to both the femaleness in women and to the maleness in men? Or are they attracted to neither, deaf to that sort of appeal, and only respond to the nonsexual characteristics of people? Or something else? I am attracted to femaleness in women and to maleness in men and to maleness in women and femaleness in men. It’s probably different for every bi person. 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-does-the-bisexual-community-want-us-to-know/684918.md?page=3)