# What economic options are there for people who will not have spouses **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 6, 2005, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114 "2005-04-06T23:05:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2005, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/1 "2005-04-06T23:05:39Z")
I was talking to a guy today and he mentioned how he and his spouse make around 6500/month combined income and it made me think about how spouses are the only real way to pool economic resources that this society values (other societies value family pooling of resources from birth to death, but its really frowned upon here and not likely to happen as a result). So what about those who do not want or have spouses, what can they do to pool resources? Join communes, get really, really good friends, or what? If someone gets laid off or wants to go back to school if they have a spouse with an income they can do that more easily, but if you don’t have a spouse there really aren’t any support mechanisms I can think of other than maybe intermediate family (and many people would only take this as a last resort) ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2005, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/2 "2005-04-06T23:08:49Z")
We live longer, too! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2005, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/3 "2005-04-06T23:22:30Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > We live longer, too! 😃 Thats only because you have a wife that nags you to not eat beer and ice cream frosting for dinner. [Error | Swedish Medical Center Seattle and Issaquah](http://www.swedish.org/16856.cfm) ---
**Author:** ![Duckster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duckster/32/1244_2.png) [@Duckster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duckster)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2005, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/4 "2005-04-06T23:36:46Z")
> [@Wesley Clark](#): > > Thats only because you have a wife that nags you to not eat beer and ice cream frosting for dinner. I would hope my wife would nag me not to eat beer, nor ice cream frosting for dinner. Ice cream frosting? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2005, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/5 "2005-04-06T23:45:26Z")
I meant cake frosing, and said ice cream frosting for some reason (I probably meant ice cream and cake frosting). Either way I get to eat candy for dinner if I want (which I do not) and married people do not. So weigh that against your longer lifespans and make a decision about who is really alive. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/6 "2005-04-07T00:31:43Z")
I’m married and can still eat whatever I want. So there! ---
**Author:** ![MaddyStrut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dbc845/32.png) [@MaddyStrut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MaddyStrut)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/7 "2005-04-07T01:00:32Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > We live longer, too! 😃 Well then, that extra money is going to have to go towards your extra long retirement! You can get a roommate. You don’t pool expenses, but can save on expenses. The cable bill and other fixed expenses are effectively cut in half. Some variable expenses (like electricity) do go up, but they don’t double (unless you get a power hog as a roommate). I hate having a roommate, so I pretty much am stuck with my own income. There are some advantages. You don’t have to worry about whether you’re wasting anyone else’s money since it’s all yours. If you want to blow it all on a new couch, no one will make you feel guilty. If you want to save it all and continue using your old dorm furniture, no one is going to pressure you to start making it look like a real adult home. And if you don’t have kids, you don’t have to worry about that pesky college funding thing. Of course, you don’t get wedding gifts, but neither do you have to pay for some expensive ceremony. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/8 "2005-04-07T01:03:18Z")
> [@MaddyStrut](#): > > Of course, you don’t get wedding gifts, but neither do you have to pay for some expensive ceremony. Vegas drive-up wedding - $400. Sometimes it’s a win/win. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Bruin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Queen\_Bruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Bruin)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/9 "2005-04-07T01:23:13Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Vegas drive-up wedding - $400. > > Sometimes it’s a win/win. 😃 Man, you got ripped off! Cost of marriage in Mesa County, Colorado: 10 smackers. And you can even do it yourself, no need for clergy! And my husband eats whatever he wants (he just has to disinfect himself if he was eating something nasty) 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Laughing\_Lagomorph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Laughing\_Lagomorph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laughing_Lagomorph)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/10 "2005-04-07T01:33:13Z")
> [@Wesley Clark](#): > > … I get to eat candy for dinner if I want (which I do not) and married people do not. … I’ve never eaten candy for dinner and never would but I can’t imagine my wife caring if I did. Unless maybe if I did it night after night for weeks on end she might start to be concerned. Actually **MaddyStrut** hit on an important point: money is the most common source of disagreements in marriages. Given peoples’ different personalities there is almost always one person who is more of a saver and one who is more of a spender, with the friction such differences inevitably bring. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/11 "2005-04-07T01:37:51Z")
> [@MaddyStrut](#): > > Well then, that extra money is going to have to go towards your extra long retirement! > > You can get a roommate. You don’t pool expenses, but can save on expenses. The cable bill and other fixed expenses are effectively cut in half. Some variable expenses (like electricity) do go up, but they don’t double (unless you get a power hog as a roommate). > > I hate having a roommate, so I pretty much am stuck with my own income. There are some advantages. You don’t have to worry about whether you’re wasting anyone else’s money since it’s all yours. If you want to blow it all on a new couch, no one will make you feel guilty. If you want to save it all and continue using your old dorm furniture, no one is going to pressure you to start making it look like a real adult home. And if you don’t have kids, you don’t have to worry about that pesky college funding thing. > > Of course, you don’t get wedding gifts, but neither do you have to pay for some expensive ceremony. I guess some sort of communal arrangement (multiple people in one area who buy products in bulk, including real estate and food) or a roommate who is a friend would give the same financial benefits. But at the same time if you lose a job or want to switch fields you do not really have a financial network unless you have intermediate family who will take you in. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/12 "2005-04-07T03:55:28Z")
Well, you know, there _are_ government programs specifically designed to help out people who have been laid off or want to go back to school. You also have to take into account that couples are more likely than singles to have non-earning dependents, and those little buggers will put one hell of a dent in your disposable income. In that case, there’s more money overall, but far less money per person. And, of course, many couples live at the edge of their means, which makes the loss of one income fairly devastating. ---
**Author:** ![Sarah\_Woodruff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df788c/32.png) [@Sarah\_Woodruff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarah_Woodruff)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/13 "2005-04-07T04:13:07Z")
**Wesley** , how do you know that you will _never_ have a spouse? 😉 Anyways, I second the roommate idea, but if you loathe and detest roommates, then perhaps, if you have any siblings, close friends or cousins (or whoever) you could pool your resources jointly in one account, in a sort of “commune-y” arrangement. I’d suggest, if you were to go down that route, that you get a contract drawn up to cover any adverse consequences that could occur. ---
**Author:** ![Imasquare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Imasquare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imasquare)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 7:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/14 "2005-04-07T07:28:45Z")
> [@CrazyCatLady](#): > > Well, you know, there _are_ government programs specifically designed to help out people who have been laid off or want to go back to school. I don’t know about the US but here in Squaresville\* the unemplyment benefits (or the government allowance you would get if you were to give up your job and return to full time study) would not even pay a quarter of the rent on a really seedy 1 bedroom apartment. - Sydney, Aust. ---
**Author:** ![Harriet\_the\_Spry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e56c9b/32.png) [@Harriet\_the\_Spry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harriet_the_Spry)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 9:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/15 "2005-04-07T09:30:08Z")
As a single person you may have more freedom to pursue earnings opportunities. For example, many careers have a traveling version that generally pays a premium, and often subsidizes living expenses. Mr. Spry, with a B.S. in Mech. Eng. at the time, did that and was able to save tons of money. Also, you will be free to relocate to better paying jobs without worrying about how it affects a spouse. ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/16 "2005-04-07T13:17:38Z")
I can’t believe that no one has mentioned: [Boston Marriages](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boston_marriage) Well ok, so **MaddyStrut** has, but not by name. ---
**Author:** ![Duckster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duckster/32/1244_2.png) [@Duckster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duckster)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/17 "2005-04-07T16:48:06Z")
> [@Wesley Clark](#): > > So weigh that against your longer lifespans and make a decision about who is really alive. So being married means not being alive? Or the other way around? Being “alive” has nothing to do with one’s marital status. Being “alive” has everything to do with your personal take on life, regardless of who may be around you. I see many “dead” people all the time. Married, single, whatever. “Dead” people blame others for their sorry lot in life. “Alive” people accept life as it is and make the best of things they cannot control. Glass half full or half empty. Your choice. No one else’s choice. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/18 "2005-04-07T17:48:09Z")
> [@Duckster](#): > > So being married means not being alive? Or the other way around? Being “alive” has nothing to do with one’s marital status. Being “alive” has everything to do with your personal take on life, regardless of who may be around you. I see many “dead” people all the time. Married, single, whatever. “Dead” people blame others for their sorry lot in life. “Alive” people accept life as it is and make the best of things they cannot control. Glass half full or half empty. Your choice. No one else’s choice. T’was a joke about which is better, living longer or eating whatever you want and doing what you want with your life. One of the main reasons that men supposedly live longer when they are married is because their spouse cajooles them into adopting healthier lifestyles. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/19 "2005-04-07T18:00:56Z")
> [@Imasquare](#): > > I don’t know about the US but here in Squaresville\* the unemplyment benefits (or the government allowance you would get if you were to give up your job and return to full time study) would not even pay a quarter of the rent on a really seedy 1 bedroom apartment. > > - Sydney, Aust. Here in the US, there are government-funded grants and loans specifically designed to help you support yourself while getting an education. You won’t exactly be living high on the hog, but you can get by, especially if you get a part-time job. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2005, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114/20 "2005-04-07T18:14:49Z")
I’m a 38 year old singleton and a wage slave. You need to learn to live with it. Here in the U.K. the tax regime is not designed for my benefit. Tax regimes promote families because the children will become wage-earners and thus tax payers. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-economic-options-are-there-for-people-who-will-not-have-spouses/298114.md?page=2)