# What emotion don't you "get"? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 25, 2008, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-emotion-dont-you-get/434892 "2008-01-25T00:13:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2008, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-emotion-dont-you-get/434892/61 "2008-01-27T00:14:56Z")
Having a crush on someone based on looks alone. I can understand being attracted to someone’s personality and character traits (intelligence, sense of humor, etc.). And I can understand how being packaged in a favorable body can make the “inside” stuff all the more attractive. But I can’t “get” seeing someone for the first time and feeling, “I MUST HAVE THEM NOW!” I don’t really get nosiness either. Like, I can understand the urge to gossip, but I don’t really get some people’s needs to find out all the details of other people’s lives. I know someone who’s always asking me what I’m doing over the weekend or what did I do over the weekend. Why does she care? And why should I tell her? ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2008, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-emotion-dont-you-get/434892/62 "2008-01-27T02:01:40Z")
I used to ask people all kinds of questions about themselves. People thought I was nosy. So I stopped asking people about themselves, and I heard things (circular friend grapevine kind of thing) like “she only talks about herself, she never asks questions about you.” Arg! You can’t win. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2008, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-emotion-dont-you-get/434892/63 "2008-01-27T02:37:34Z")
I agree with those who have said that they don’t get jealousy about a partner’s behavior. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2008, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-emotion-dont-you-get/434892/64 "2008-01-27T03:06:47Z")
[QUOTE=OpalCat] I used to ask people all kinds of questions about themselves. People thought I was nosy. So I stopped asking people about themselves, and I heard things (circular friend grapevine kind of thing) like “she only talks about herself, she never asks questions about you.” Arg! You can’t win. [/QUOTE] I admit it’s a balancing act, but it’s not that hard if you know the right kinds of questions to ask. I usually don’t ask personal questions until someone starts talking to me about personal stuff. If someone mentions they had a hot date last night, then I feel it’s allowable to ask what they did. But I wouldn’t just blurt out that kind of question without the appropriate set-up. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2008, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-emotion-dont-you-get/434892/65 "2008-01-27T04:19:19Z")
[QUOTE=monstro] I know someone who’s always asking me what I’m doing over the weekend or what did I do over the weekend. Why does she care? And why should I tell her? [/QUOTE] That tends to be a safe topic of conversation at work, though. At my workplace, Friday afternoons are usually really slow, so we aren’t doing much but killing time. “Exciting weekend plans?” is just one of those time-killing questions that doesn’t have any pressure involved. “Nah. You?” or “Gonna do boring-thing-X” or “Woohoo! Getting MARRIED!” ---
**Author:** ![NajaNivea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/22d042/32.png) [@NajaNivea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NajaNivea)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2008, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-emotion-dont-you-get/434892/66 "2008-01-27T05:19:48Z")
[QUOTE=elelle] I have CDD, Competitive Deficit Disorder. [/QUOTE] Is this for real? [Google doesn’t exactly overwhelm me with responses.](http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=%22Competitive+Deficit+Disorder&btnG=Search) ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2008, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-emotion-dont-you-get/434892/67 "2008-01-27T20:54:03Z")
I don’t understand the kind of ruthless ambition that drives people to claw their way up the corporate ladder. I can understand having personal and professional goals, and to work your ass off to achieve them \*on you own, \*but I don’t understand the maniacal drive to climb up at the expense of everyone and everything else. And then there’s the equally-maniacal frenzy called spectator sports (yawn). ---
**Author:** ![Mister\_Rik](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mister_rik/32/491_2.png) [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2008, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-emotion-dont-you-get/434892/68 "2008-01-27T23:35:51Z")
[QUOTE=Priceguy] Still, the accusers must know that they would abuse the hell out of that power if they ever got there, so they assume that everyone else is the same. Well, not me. Don’t get it. [/QUOTE] My all-time favorite proverb comes France: “A man doesn’t look under the bed unless he’s hidden there himself.” The applications of this statement are almost limitless. > [@ChiefScott](#): > > I don’t get worry. > So much time and energy is wasted by folks worrying. I can’t be bothered with worrying and this sticks in the craw of most people I am aquainted with. If something bad may happen, I feel better learning about it and preparing for it. I believe that something will happen, or it won’t. Same with me. Which reminds me of another “proverb”: “If I worry, will the future change?” – Kwai Chang Kane > [@Beware of Doug](#): > > Sadism. > > (Anybody want to try and give a reasoned defense of either of the last two? What use are they to humanity? How would this be a lesser world without them? Or are they really what I think they are, pathologies?) Well, without sadism there would be an awful lot of frustrated masochists 😛 ---
**Author:** ![CaerieD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@CaerieD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CaerieD)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2008, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-emotion-dont-you-get/434892/69 "2008-01-28T00:13:11Z")
Attachment. If something or someone is out of sight, they are entirely out of mind as well. Friends, family, lovers, it doesn’t matter. I enjoy people’s company based on shared activities, but as soon as those activities are over, I feel no need to continue said attachment. It’s not that I don’t care about people–I do, and love my family deeply–but I just don’t feel the need to seek people out when there isn’t some reason to do so. It just entirely slips my mind. ---
**Author:** ![Ice\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/dfb087/32.png) [@Ice\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ice_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2008, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-emotion-dont-you-get/434892/70 "2008-01-28T00:26:23Z")
I think I’m with the OP as to envy. When folks around me have cool stuff I don’t have, I may say, “Wow, I’m envious!” but I’m not really. If it’s cool enough and useful enough that I should get one, either I will eventually get one – or enough time lapses that I forget all about it, and something else comes along. I certainly don’t sit up at night brooding about someone else’s cool stuff. There’s lots more for me to brood over! 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-emotion-dont-you-get/434892.md?page=3)