# What exactly happens when you "friend" someone here? **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [November 29, 2011, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421 "2011-11-29T04:45:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/1 "2011-11-29T04:45:31Z")
You’d think after 6 or 7 years I’d know, but I don’t. Is there some secret sharing of posts or something? For the life of me I can’t work out why this would be advantageous. Quick look-up to PM or something? ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/2 "2011-11-29T04:53:09Z")
As far as I know, all you get is a list to see if they’re online or not (at any current time). Sort of like Instant Messenger, only without the instant messaging…so all you’re left with is a list of who is currently online. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/3 "2011-11-29T05:48:22Z")
They get to sleep on your couch anytime they want and you have to say yes. Choose your friends wisely. ---
**Author:** ![Lancia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lancia/32/17174_2.png) [@Lancia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lancia)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 6:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/4 "2011-11-29T06:36:48Z")
But they have to bring the beer, right? ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/5 "2011-11-29T06:43:00Z")
Every time you accept a friend request, we kill an orphan. ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/6 "2011-11-29T06:47:45Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Every time you accept a friend request, we kill an orphan. Do you kill them often? ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 8:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/7 "2011-11-29T08:44:24Z")
> [@Idle\_Thoughts](#): > > As far as I know, all you get is a list to see if they’re online or not (at any current time). > Sort of like Instant Messenger, only without the instant messaging…so all you’re left with is a list of who is currently online. Well, you can still contact them through a PM. That’s why I use them–to let people know I have them on my short list of people I message. (Oddly enough, you can still put people on that list without informing them of such.) ---
**Author:** ![Lare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/53a042/32.png) [@Lare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lare)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/8 "2011-11-29T14:30:34Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Every time you accept a friend request, we kill an orphan. > [@Giles](#): > > Do you kill them often? No. Any given orphan can only be killed once. As **Idle Thoughts** said, it just gives you a list where you can quickly see who’s on line. It’s best use is to quickly see which moderators are not here for whatever nefarious purposes you might wish to engage. ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/9 "2011-11-29T14:45:12Z")
> [@Lare](#): > > As **Idle Thoughts** said, it just gives you a list where you can quickly see who’s on line. It’s best use is to quickly see which moderators are not here for whatever nefarious purposes you might wish to engage. This made me laugh hard enough to spill my tea. That will be one keyboard and cleaning services for one robe please. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/10 "2011-11-29T14:51:22Z")
> [@Lare](#): > > As **Idle Thoughts** said, it just gives you a list where you can quickly see who’s on line. It’s best use is to quickly see which moderators are not here for whatever nefarious purposes you might wish to engage. The downside to that is you have to be “friends” with a mod. I’m not sure it’s worth it. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/11 "2011-11-29T14:55:51Z")
> [@Lare](#): > > No. Any given orphan can only be killed once. I dunno, we have pretty good medicine these days. Some orphans can indeed be resucitated and then killed a second time. There was that one kid. Damn, but they must’ve killed him nearly a dozen times. Even **Skald the Rhymer** was pleading for them to stop. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/12 "2011-11-29T15:10:23Z")
You’ve heard of “friends with benefits,” right? Well, it’s nothing like that. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/13 "2011-11-29T15:13:47Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > The downside to that is you have to be “friends” with a mod. > I’m not sure it’s worth it. 😛 ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Lare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/53a042/32.png) [@Lare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lare)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/14 "2011-11-29T15:23:44Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > I dunno, we have pretty good medicine these days. Some orphans can indeed be resucitated and then killed a second time. > > There was that one kid. Damn, but they must’ve killed him nearly a dozen times. Even **Skald the Rhymer** was pleading for them to stop. Is this the origin of zombie threads? ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/15 "2011-11-29T15:58:34Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Even **Skald the Rhymer** was pleading for them to stop. You had me going till that last bit. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/16 "2011-11-29T17:00:50Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > ☹ Aw, **twicks**. You know I love you. ---
**Author:** ![JSexton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/96bed5/32.png) [@JSexton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JSexton)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/17 "2011-11-29T17:16:09Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Aw, **twicks**. You know I love you. I checked this post for invisitext. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/18 "2011-11-29T17:51:51Z")
I have actually never run afoul of any of the mods on this board, and have even co-authored (to a very small degree) a Staff Report with one. I attribute this state to the fact that I am a charming, witty, entertaining cretin who keeps his rampant jerkism mostly in check when online. That and the monthly tithe in brownies I pay. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/19 "2011-11-29T19:44:10Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > You had me going till that last bit. > :rolleyes: Yeah, ok. That was over the top. Skald would hunt down the same kid in every alternate dimension just to get all of them. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2011, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421/20 "2011-11-29T20:09:22Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Yeah, ok. That was over the top. > > Skald would hunt down the same kid in every alternate dimension just to get all of them. That’s more like it 😃 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-exactly-happens-when-you-friend-someone-here/604421.md?page=2)