# What gift would you get your male child for his first big performance? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 9, 2014, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767 "2014-12-09T16:02:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/1 "2014-12-09T16:02:02Z")
A friend of mine on Facebook asks what people think she should get her kid as a gift commemorating his first big performance (I think it’s with an orchestra?). She mentions there’s a tradition of buying women flowers on such an occasion, but she doesn’t think he’d appreciate that. Is there a standard thing to get? Or if not, what do you think might work? ---
**Author:** ![WordMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e8c25b/32.png) [@WordMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WordMan)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/2 "2014-12-09T16:10:34Z")
How old is the kid? How invested are they in the performance? When it was a fairly straightforward performance - not a lot riding on it except nerves; no big solos - we would just go get ice cream. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/3 "2014-12-09T16:14:56Z")
Age seems to be the big question. My son’s been in various middle school and high school performances (choir, drama) and we always just did the “Pick out a place for dinner” thing. If we’re talking a professional orchestra, the answer might change. ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/4 "2014-12-09T16:15:57Z")
The manchild is 12.5 years old. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/5 "2014-12-09T16:18:30Z")
Letting him pick out the restaurant and winding up at Steak & Shake seems appropriate for that age. ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/6 "2014-12-09T16:22:18Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > Letting him pick out the restaurant and winding up at Steak & Shake seems appropriate for that age. I have relayed that suggestion. I think it may be the winner in my book. I also suggested, though, a card for a game he plays that takes cash infusions, with a bow on. I also suggested a pair of socks, like a _really nice_ pair of socks. Also I suggested a kitten. Thrown at him right after he takes his bow at the end. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/7 "2014-12-09T16:54:39Z")
A cool pair of sunglasses. ---
**Author:** ![peedin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peedin/32/14095_2.png) [@peedin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peedin)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/8 "2014-12-09T16:56:14Z")
Nothing. Why does every occasion have to be marked with a present? Tell him “you did a good job” and that’s it. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/9 "2014-12-09T16:57:29Z")
I gave my nephew flowers for his first big play role. He seemed kinda tickled. (I mean, all the girls were getting flowers, why not?) ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/10 "2014-12-09T17:01:01Z")
Cigars obviously, or a good scotch. ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/11 "2014-12-09T17:21:21Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > Cigars obviously, or a good scotch. And a hooker. ---
**Author:** ![Hello\_Again](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/85e7bf/32.png) [@Hello\_Again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hello_Again)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/12 "2014-12-09T17:22:09Z")
? Flowers are what you give for a performance. They aren’t a gift in the usual sense. It’s more like a commemoration of an achievement. Despite possessing a vagina, I don’t like cut flowers. I don’t remember my preferences ever entering into it. It’s more like a ritual. So I’d say, flowers are fine and nothing is also fine. Picking the restaurant is not a gift, but then perhaps it’s the perfect nongift for a nongifting occasion. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/13 "2014-12-09T17:26:44Z")
> [@Frylock](#): > > Also I suggested a kitten. Thrown at him right after he takes his bow at the end. I really want to see this. So instead of flowers people throw dozens of kittens at the prima ballerina. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/14 "2014-12-09T17:28:35Z")
If he is going to be in any groups that require a tie for performance wear, a tie wouldn’t be a bad idea. Even if he already has a tie, a special tie would be good. Or ice cream. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/15 "2014-12-09T17:29:50Z")
Give him the bill for all the music lessons. ---
**Author:** ![C3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/c3/32/3108_2.png) [@C3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C3)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/16 "2014-12-09T17:43:54Z")
My (8 yr old) son dances and I usually try to give him something related to the show he’s in on opening night. For instance, when he was a mouse in the Nutcracker, I gave him a little mouse stuffed animal; when his show had a theme of stars, I gave him a necklace with a pendant showing a constellation. Something very little, just so that he has something while all the girls are receiving their flowers. Adult men, in my experience, usually get flowers on opening night. I also like the kitten throwing idea. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/17 "2014-12-09T18:50:19Z")
Oh, _that_ kind of a performance. :o ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/18 "2014-12-09T18:52:03Z")
The kitten would like to raise an objection. ---
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2014, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-gift-would-you-get-your-male-child-for-his-first-big-performance/706767/19 "2014-12-09T18:55:09Z")
A trophy. One of those plastic jobbies with the columns and a little gold plastic music something on top. Boys like trophies.