# What have they done with Vampires?!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 16, 2011, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519 "2011-09-16T14:31:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2011, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/61 "2011-09-22T18:48:26Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > MUch of it by me. Yes, **Cal**. Props. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Bird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Little\_Bird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Bird)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2011, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/62 "2011-09-22T19:23:17Z")
I highly recommend the OP watch the recent remake of Fright Night. Colin Firth is a 100% dead sexy emotionless monster killing machine who drinks the blood instead of spattering it about like a spaz. Also David Tennant is awesome. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Bosstrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstrain)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2011, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/63 "2011-09-22T22:19:25Z")
> [@Little\_Bird](#): > > I highly recommend the OP watch the recent remake of Fright Night. Colin Firth is a 100% dead sexy emotionless monster killing machine who drinks the blood instead of spattering it about like a spaz. Also David Tennant is awesome. Thanks, I’ll check that out! David Tennant is always awesome, BTW, or at least in everything I’ve seen him in so far anyway :D. This tip is also very cool 'cause if anyone asks me how I found out about the movie…I can alway say a **Little Bird** told me :D…priceless. Thanks again. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![FlyingDragonFan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c89c15/32.png) [@FlyingDragonFan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FlyingDragonFan)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2011, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/64 "2011-09-22T22:38:50Z")
> [@Little\_Bird](#): > > I highly recommend the OP watch the recent remake of Fright Night. Colin Firth is a 100% dead sexy emotionless monster killing machine who drinks the blood instead of spattering it about like a spaz. Also David Tennant is awesome. I’m pretty sure you meant Colin Farrell. Colin Firth as a vampire would probably have been a very different movie. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![psiekier](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/psiekier/32/116_2.png) [@psiekier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psiekier)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2011, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/65 "2011-09-23T14:27:16Z")
Wow, this far down, and nobody’s linked to [Cecil’s article on the best way to kill Vampires](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/37/whats-the-best-way-to-kill-a-vampire) yet? > [@GreedySmurf](#): > > D&D, which originated back in the late 70’s, had Vampires, where a stake through the heart wouldn’t kill the vamp outright, but would render it immobile. You had to cut off the head and burn it to truly kill the vampire. > > It’s an interesting data point I think that the fact it needed to be wooden was still important, but wasn’t tied to staking it in it’s coffin. But also that it still didn’t kill it outright. After we moved into the new house, I got rid of a giant chunk of my _Dragon_ magazine collection - keeping all the issues with _Star Frontiers_ and _Gamma World_ articles, of course. I’m pretty sure I sold it, but one year, _Dragon_ had a Halloween article that included First Edition AD&D rules for several of the _other_ types of Vampires from different folklore around the world. I guess if you were a mean DM you could surprise your players with a Vampire that _didn’t_ die when staked through the heart. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_M](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@Captain\_M](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_M)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2011, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/66 "2011-09-23T20:21:20Z")
I always thought that the “Vampire Vs. Zombie” argument was pretty invalid. Why? Zombies are the bodies of dead people re-animated by evil magic or the occult. Therefore they fall into the “Minions of Darkness/Creatures of the Night” category that Dracula always brags he can control with but a thought. Put a vampire in a room full of zombies and the only thing they’re gonna do is stare blankly at it, waiting for orders. Of course that argument only works for the magic Zombies, the George Romero chemical accident/atomic energy vampires are another story…But even then, those Zombies have an insatiable appetite for the flesh of the LIVING. They’d have no interest in a vampire since they’re also, technically, not alive. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Bosstrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstrain)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2011, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/67 "2011-09-23T21:50:12Z")
> [@Captain\_M](#): > > …those Zombies have an insatiable appetite for the flesh of the LIVING. They’d have no interest in a vampire since they’re also, technically, not alive. An excellent point, my dear Watson :). Why didn’t I think of that :smack:, even a chemical zombie would just stroll on past a vamp anyway. Actually, why didn’t DW think of that! Besides them just wanting the matchup for fun, there is no bases for even having this fight to begin with, further proves how ludacris it actually was to pit the two together. Oh, and BTW, I firmly believe that zombies should have remained magical, the only point of a virus zombie is merely to have a terrifying threat that will undoubtedly take over the world…hate those kinds of movies with a vengeance. I want there to be a solution to the problem, as have all humans throughout time. People strive on solutions, they’re what makes the world go round and all that. To have a problem with no solution is mere insanity…Oh, that’s right, there _are_ insane people in the world, I almost forgot that… ---
**Author:** ![psiekier](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/psiekier/32/116_2.png) [@psiekier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psiekier)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/68 "2011-09-24T14:12:33Z")
> [@Bosstrain](#): > > Oh, and BTW, I firmly believe that zombies should have remained magical, the only point of a virus zombie is merely to have a terrifying threat that will undoubtedly take over the world…hate those kinds of movies with a vengeance. I want there to be a solution to the problem, as have all humans throughout time. People strive on solutions, they’re what makes the world go round and all that. To have a problem with no solution is mere insanity…Oh, that’s right, there _are_ insane people in the world, I almost forgot that… [Dude!](http://www.amazon.com/World-War-Oral-History-Zombie/dp/0307888681/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1316873490&sr=8-1) ---
**Author:** ![Bosstrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Bosstrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstrain)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/69 "2011-09-26T13:12:31Z")
> [@psiekier](#): > > [Dude!](http://www.amazon.com/World-War-Oral-History-Zombie/dp/0307888681/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1316873490&sr=8-1) Yes, but is there a solution :D? ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/70 "2011-09-26T13:39:09Z")
After seeing the musicals Lestat, Dracula, and Dance of the Vampire, I was tempted to write a book “Broadway Vampires Suck” ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Bird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Little\_Bird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Bird)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2011, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/71 "2011-09-27T00:42:23Z")
> [@FlyingDragonFan](#): > > I’m pretty sure you meant Colin Farrell. Colin Firth as a vampire would probably have been a very different movie. 🙂 Shit, I always do that with those two. I even thought I double checked this time. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Bosstrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Bosstrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstrain)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2011, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/72 "2011-09-27T14:08:25Z")
> [@Little\_Bird](#): > > Shit, I always do that with those two. I even thought I double checked this time. :mad: You could always just say Colin Firthell, then at least you’d be half right ;). (awkward) 😃 ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2011, 10:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/73 "2011-10-01T10:20:15Z")
> [@Captain\_M](#): > > I always thought that the “Vampire Vs. Zombie” argument was pretty invalid. Why? Zombies are the bodies of dead people re-animated by evil magic or the occult. Therefore they fall into the “Minions of Darkness/Creatures of the Night” category that Dracula always brags he can control with but a thought. Put a vampire in a room full of zombies and the only thing they’re gonna do is stare blankly at it, waiting for orders. > > Of course that argument only works for the magic Zombies, the George Romero chemical accident/atomic energy vampires are another story…But even then, those Zombies have an insatiable appetite for the flesh of the LIVING. They’d have no interest in a vampire since they’re also, technically, not alive. It also only works for Dracula, who, in modern lore, is usually much more powerful than the average vampire. I do agree with your claim that zombies wouldn’t attack vampires because they aren’t alive (unless they are just too stupid to know the difference). What would be interesting would be Vampires who have a symbiotic relationship with humans, having to fight against zombies who are killing off their only food source. The vampires are smart enough to know that they can’t go around killing people and have to ration their food. The zombies consider no such restriction. In fact, I think there’s a webcomic that is somewhat like that, but the enemies aren’t flat out said to be zombies. But they do seem to be dead people who are controlled by someone else. Can anyone remember the name of it? EDIT: > [@psiekier](#): > > Wow, this far down, and nobody’s linked to [Cecil’s article on the best way to kill Vampires](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/37/whats-the-best-way-to-kill-a-vampire) yet? This would make an awesome series, with all the different types of vampires.Cecil mentions. If someone sees this and tries to make a webcomic about this, see if you can get Cecil a cameo. Remember, he is the Perfect Master and all… ---
**Author:** ![Bosstrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Bosstrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstrain)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2011, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/74 "2011-10-02T20:48:48Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > …What would be interesting would be Vampires who have a symbiotic relationship with humans, having to fight against zombies who are killing off their only food source. The vampires are smart enough to know that they can’t go around killing people and have to ration their food. The zombies consider no such restriction… Okay, at least it would be better than Being Human, and vamps aren’t just simply friendly with people, they’d have a reason to keep people alive and not kill them…but that doesn’t mean they have to like it! ---
**Author:** ![tamtrible](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e36b37/32.png) [@tamtrible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tamtrible)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2011, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/75 "2011-10-02T21:16:44Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > What would be interesting would be Vampires who have a symbiotic relationship with humans, having to fight against zombies who are killing off their only food source. The vampires are smart enough to know that they can’t go around killing people and have to ration their food. The zombies consider no such restriction. > > In fact, I think there’s a webcomic that is somewhat like that, but the enemies aren’t flat out said to be zombies. But they do seem to be dead people who are controlled by someone else. Can anyone remember the name of it? 's Last Blood. [http://lastblood.keenspot.com/](http://lastblood.keenspot.com/) And I just wanted to say, re: an earlier post: I don’t think vampires necessarily need to be _evil_. There are some very excellent stories out there where the vampires aren’t evil (for example, Tanya Huff’s series with a vampire as one of the protagonists). What is important, and which rather annoys me about sparklepires, is that vampires should be creatures of darkness, even if they aren’t actually evil. In some stories, vampires can tolerate sun/daytime, but generally _not_ entirely without damage, or at least temporary weakness. The sun should at least make them wince and squint, not light up like a freaking Christmas tree… ---
**Author:** ![cinsavant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@cinsavant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cinsavant)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2011, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/76 "2011-11-09T13:47:11Z")
If you are looking for a good “Vampires are evil, seductive monsters” might I suggest Brian Lumley’s Necroscope series ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2011, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519/77 "2011-11-09T14:57:14Z")
> [@tamtrible](#): > > 's Last Blood. [http://lastblood.keenspot.com/](http://lastblood.keenspot.com/) Yip, that’s it. Although I didn’t remember such an analog and dirty art style, so at first I thought I’d stumbled on a different comic. I also like that the Vampires, while they aren’t really evil, aren’t good either. They’re just another species (essentially), doing what they need to survive. Of course, I haven’t made it to the end yet. And apparently it is getting [made into a movie](http://www.lastblood.net/main/)! unfortunately, it sounds like it might be based on prequels, and thus not be nearly as much fun. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-have-they-done-with-vampires/596519.md?page=3)