# What I hate about Porno **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 16, 2000, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796 "2000-03-16T14:45:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2000, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/21 "2000-03-18T05:35:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Does the Playboy channel show hard-core porn or only soft-core. > > What is the difference anyway? I think I know, but I might be wrong. Playboy, Spice, etc, show “cable versions” of XXX flicks. These are full nudity, most sexual action/contact. Cable versions do _not_ show any penetration at all. The difference between soft- and hardcore is less easily quantified, however. But generally speaking soft-core=no penetration. -andros- ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2000, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/22 "2000-03-18T05:37:00Z")
Sorry, softcore also does not include oral-genital contact, although it can and does include some manual-gbital contact, provided there’s no digital penetration. -andros- ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2000, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/23 "2000-03-18T14:48:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by JohnLarrigan: > \*\*Dude, my reply was in jest, for I fear the wrath of a man on a battleship coming after me for the use of a smilie in the pit. > \*\* He’s on a carrier. Anyway…re: the OP. I gotta agree. Well-acted porn would be a much greater turn on. What’s bad is when the porn stars actually try to act. I wonder…which big time movie stars would be able to make a really good porn movie? ---
**Author:** ![Road\_Rash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a8b319/32.png) [@Road\_Rash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Road_Rash)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2000, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/24 "2000-03-18T14:54:00Z")
You missed one rant about newer porn flicks. Humor. THe plots of the earlier ones were so outrageous that they made great party flicks. John Holmes using his weener as a weapon slapping Marilyn Chambers is hilarious. Evan as late as the late 80’s there was one called “Let me tell you about Black Chicks,” by the Dark Brothers. A bunch of black girls talking about experiences with white guys. One scene a girl was a babysitter for a very well endowed baby. Another had a couple of klansmen on her. All the guys had shades or maskes in all the scenes, that way the same guys could be different people (the schlongs gave that away. Have you noticed they never kiss in porno. I find a good sloppy tongue kiss to be quite erotic. Maybe because a kiss is a very intimate and emotionally charged act. I will likely post this seperately, but was Gregory Dark, the porn director turned to music video/feature film director one of the Dark Brothers? ---
**Author:** ![Nickrz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbce88/32.png) [@Nickrz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nickrz)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2000, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/25 "2000-03-19T19:21:00Z")
The thing I find most painfully unrealistic is their habit of withdrawing at the crucial moment and deposting their load in an innappropriate (?) place. Like you wife or girlfriend wouldn’t kill you if you blew spooge all over her nice new $90.00/$600.00 Victoria’s Secret teddy/garterbelt/stockings/leather jumpsuit/chaps/French maid costume/nurse’s get-up/ what-have-you ? ---
**Author:** ![Atrael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Atrael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atrael)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2000, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/26 "2000-03-20T16:05:00Z")
I’ll second Zette and highly recomend the Playboy Channel. Lots of great porn, not hard-core (i.e. full penitration shots) but pleanty of things to catch your eye. I like the Amature Home video show, and Night Calls personally. And of course since I live in a bible thumping area, we can’t get it on cable…so DirectTV got my business. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Zambezi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7cd45c/32.png) [@Mr.Zambezi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Zambezi)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2000, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/27 "2000-03-20T16:47:00Z")
IF you can find it, I thought that “Diary of a Flea” was a great flick. Kind of funny and lot’s of taboo breaking. John Holmes was the main star. ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2000, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/28 "2000-09-19T00:35:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by divemaster \* > 6) **Removal of most if not all pubic hair.** > I _like_ the buzz-cut look, and general pubic trimming, including the labial area if desired. To me, that means you take what you have and do some slight grooming. But most porno women go for the bald or “landing strip” look. Does nothing for me. It may not do anything for you, but it does something for them. As someone who likes to shave all pubic hair off, I can tell you… it feels a LOT better. It feels a lot MORE. Sex and masturbation with pubic hair…um… well compared to being bald it’s like having sex through a sock or something. ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2000, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/29 "2000-09-19T00:42:23Z")
is Peter North. ICK!!! Make him go away. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2000, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/30 "2000-09-19T00:47:32Z")
Wow. 6 months old. Is there something you would like to share with us, Opal? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![hypergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/49beb7/32.png) [@hypergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hypergirl)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2000, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/31 "2000-09-19T02:15:44Z")
Easy solution. If you and your girlfriend don’t like the porn that already exists, make some of your own. That way you can make it however you like it. ---
**Author:** ![Eo\_Echo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ebca7d/32.png) [@Eo\_Echo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eo_Echo)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2000, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/32 "2000-09-19T04:44:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by hypergirl \* > \*\*Easy solution. If you and your girlfriend don’t like the porn that already exists, make some of your own. That way you can make it however you like it. \*\* Yeah, just make sure you keep an eye on the tape. The video I made with Pamela Anderson has vanished and I shudder to think what’ll happen when it hits the net. ---
**Author:** ![MysteryFellow63427](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2000, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/33 "2000-09-19T05:37:00Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Rysdad \* > I wonder…which big time movie stars would be able to make a really good porn movie?_\* Nicole Kidman. (Did you see Eyes Wide Shut?) ::drool:: ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2000, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/34 "2000-09-19T12:46:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Coldfire \* > \*\*Wow. 6 months old. Is there something you would like to share with us, Opal? > > 😉 \*\* Wow, why the hell was this at the top of my Pit list? It was like #5 on the list. ::cue Twilight Zone music:: (I never leave the first page of any of the forums anymore) ---
**Author:** ![echidnasarf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e99b99/32.png) [@echidnasarf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/echidnasarf)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2000, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/35 "2000-09-19T16:55:26Z")
1. Cumshots…BORING! 2. Condoms. Sure, they are trying to put out the ‘safe-sex’ message, but you ever notice that they take off the condom for the cumshot, and quite often the ‘star’ then has sperm shot INTO HER/HIS MOUTH. Doesn’t this kind of defeat the purpose? 3. Boobjobs. The main thing I don’t like about this, is that you can tell how long someone’s been in porn. Newbie=natural… One year=reasonable boob job… two + years=REALLY BAD, oversized bood job. All to get ‘just one more role.’ 4.Men. Too few ‘actors’. A little variety, PLEASE. 1. Ron Jeremy. 'nuff said. ---
**Author:** ![divemaster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/divemaster/32/78_2.png) [@divemaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/divemaster)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2000, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/36 "2000-09-19T17:27:09Z")
> [@](#): > > Wow, why the hell was this at the top of my Pit list? It was like #5 on the list. ::cue Twilight Zone music:: Very strange indeed. I referenced this thread in another, so that I didn’t have to re-type a point I was trying to make similar to my OP here. However, I didn’t post to this thread, so I have no idea how it got bumped. Views alone shouldn’t bump, right? The only thing I can think of is a glitch in the software. Maybe someone posted, but was timed out by the system. System records a ‘post’ but nothing shows up. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Gomez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d78d45/32.png) [@Gomez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gomez)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2000, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/37 "2000-09-19T19:23:32Z")
is that fat little mexican guy with a thick moustache who seems to be in every porno movie I’ve ever seen. ---
**Author:** ![plnnr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@plnnr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/plnnr)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2000, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/38 "2000-09-19T19:40:34Z")
Andrew Blake’s work is probably the best out there in a lot of areas. The scenes are actually believable (not much dialogue but they aren’t just complilations from other movies), the people are very attractive without being freakish, the locations are always very nice (lots of exterior work), and they’re shot on film, not video. “Night Trips” is a good introduction- its got a real story line, Randy Spears is actually a pretty good actor, and the sex is torrid. ---
**Author:** ![Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bottle_of_Smoke)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2000, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/39 "2000-09-19T20:48:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by plnnr \* > \*\*“Night Trips” is a good introduction- its got a real story line, Randy Spears is actually a pretty good actor, and the sex is torrid. \*\* Great choice, **plnnr**. If only they made more like this one. It’s explicit, but also very erotic and sensual (and let’s face it, “erotic” can hardly ever be used to describe most pornos). Warning to **OpalCat** , though – Peter North is in this one, too. I didn’t really notice him much, though, since my attention was focused on Tori Welles.😃 ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2000, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796/40 "2000-09-19T21:27:44Z")
You should watch “The Show” (IIRC), starring Chasey Lain (the target of hilarious worship by the Bloodhound Gang) because that’s some funny stuff. There’s a scene where a fake talk show hosts talks about how the feds seized hundreds of high-profile porno flicks because they featured beastiality…but then realized that it was only Ron Jeremy. Man, I watch way too much porn… 😛 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-i-hate-about-porno/4796.md?page=3)