# What if God... HEY! Where are you going?? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 12, 2001, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957 "2001-10-12T01:49:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Darqangelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecccb3/32.png) [@Darqangelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darqangelle)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/1 "2001-10-12T01:49:53Z")
First, a few disclaimers: 1)This is for personal research, not for a school project (I graduated M-A-N-Y years ago). 2)I’m in the process of writing a story, but in order to do this right, I need some input. 3)I’ve asked friends as well who can give me their input, and now I turn to you, complete strangers with a nice little cross-section of various demographics. Here we go: **Let’s say God/Allah/Buddha/your-deity-of-choice shows up in your neighbourhood. How would you know it’s him/her? What powers or traits would (s)he have?** I realize this might come across as a marijuana-induced brilliant philosophical idea™ after listening to “What If God Was One Of Us?” on the ol’ soft-rock station one particular p.m., but I assure you that’s not the case. I was also hesitant to put this into GD because, in all honesty, I think that the answers will refect on people’s beliefs which vary as much as opinions. So, there you go: The “Big Guy” shows up. How’d you know? What would make him/her different and make you say, “Oh yeah. THAT’S the Almighty themselves right there, boy! Hal-ee-freakin-loo-yeah! Time for me balance the ol’ moral checkbook 'cause it’s last call!” Well? ---
**Author:** ![Ripple](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b2d939/32.png) [@Ripple](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ripple)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/2 "2001-10-12T01:56:35Z")
Homer Simpson / Perfect teeth. Nice smell. A class act, all the way. / Homer Simpson ---
**Author:** ![Darqangelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecccb3/32.png) [@Darqangelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darqangelle)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/3 "2001-10-12T01:58:42Z")
…soooooooo, you’re telling me that anyone looking like Wayne Newton qualifies, then? ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/4 "2001-10-12T02:03:29Z")
I’m thinking he’d have a solution to the Minnesota Vikings’ woes. If someone figures out how to get us to the Super Bowl and win it, then hell, I’ll worship him as king and god. ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/5 "2001-10-12T02:03:52Z")
On even-numbered days, when I actually believe in them, my God and Goddess _are_ in my neighborhood. Earth, trees, clouds, sun, Goddess, and God–from my Wiccan perspective, they’re all aspects of the same thing…and so are we. Immanence is a beautiful thing. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/6 "2001-10-12T02:15:40Z")
I would have to say it would be obvious from all the wars and killing in His/Her name. ---
**Author:** ![Darqangelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecccb3/32.png) [@Darqangelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darqangelle)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/7 "2001-10-12T02:28:15Z")
**Shibb** I don’t understand. Can you elaborate? ---
**Author:** ![Dark\_Lord\_Davidson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bc8723/32.png) [@Dark\_Lord\_Davidson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dark_Lord_Davidson)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/8 "2001-10-12T02:57:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Darqangelle \* > \*\ ***Shibb** I don’t understand. Can you elaborate? \*\* I think Shibb is saying that if god appeared, it would obviously either be someone middle-eastern looking (as in Allah, and Islamic faith) or someone in nice white robes with a crown of thorns (aka Christianity) or any other deity. Or at least that’s how I interpreted the post. ---
**Author:** ![Dale\_The\_Bold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/41988e/32.png) [@Dale\_The\_Bold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dale_The_Bold)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/9 "2001-10-12T03:07:36Z")
God would never make the claim to be God, just be a very ordinary, humble, and extremely kind individual. However, somehow, _you would just know_. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/10 "2001-10-12T03:19:42Z")
A slob like one of us Just a stranger on the bus. ---
**Author:** ![Essured](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Essured](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Essured)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/11 "2001-10-12T04:06:05Z")
I think she would radiate peace. Whenever you came near her, I think you’d just feel comforted, safe and worthy. And before some idiot doper says that they feel the same way about seat belts / security alarms / guns, I’m talking about a real peace… 😛 That’s my WAG, anyway. Actually, you’d also feel super connected to all things (though perhaps not to things as prosaic as your favourite jogging shoes, etc…) ---
**Author:** ![Trucido](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@Trucido](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trucido)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/12 "2001-10-12T04:20:22Z")
Nothing. Even if it were a bearded fellow in white robes smiting folk left and healing the sick right, with a team of flying chaps waving flaming swords behind him. I’d likely put it down to an overly spicy breakfast burrito. ---
**Author:** ![grendel72](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/91b2a8/32.png) [@grendel72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grendel72)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/13 "2001-10-12T04:48:09Z")
He wasn’t white and fluffy he just had sideburns. [sub]From the song _Deus_ by the Sugarcubes.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![leroy\_the\_mule](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6a8cbe/32.png) [@leroy\_the\_mule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leroy_the_mule)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/14 "2001-10-12T04:51:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Darqangelle \* > > * * * > > I realize this might come across as a marijuana-induced brilliant philosophical idea™ after listening to “What If God Was One Of Us?” on the ol’ soft-rock station one particular p.m., but I assure you that’s not the case. > > \*\* …oh, so you’re saying the great Immanence I encountered wasn’t God because I had just burned a bowl?😃 ---
**Author:** ![TN\_hippie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/858c86/32.png) [@TN\_hippie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TN_hippie)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/15 "2001-10-12T06:02:57Z")
Maw Nature. An earthy, vibrant, wild-haired, lusty yet grandmotherly type with rainbow eyes. She talks to flowers and trees and enjoys sunshine, rain, and snow equally. She laughs a lot. I suspect that children and animals would be comfortably drawn to her. Most adults would regard her with suspicion and/or fear. ---
**Author:** ![Gaspode](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/aeb1de/32.png) [@Gaspode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gaspode)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/16 "2001-10-12T06:21:02Z")
The answer depends an awful lot on why he/she is there. Is this thes second coming, beginning of Amageddon thing? Or is it the 'I didn’t get it right with Jesus, Mohommed, Buddha, Zroaster etc. and I’ll try to get these fools to listen one more time"? The personality and displayed powers are going to vary depending on what he/she wants to achieve. ---
**Author:** ![DarrenS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/977dab/32.png) [@DarrenS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarrenS)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/17 "2001-10-12T06:27:04Z")
He’d be the one that denies it - “Only the true messiah denies his divinity.” -Monty Python’s “The Life Of Brian”. ---
**Author:** ![the\_iconoclast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b38774/32.png) [@the\_iconoclast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_iconoclast)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/18 "2001-10-12T06:31:19Z")
The iconoclast will have no gods before him. ---
**Author:** ![NiceGuyJack](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/niceguyjack/32/3069_2.png) [@NiceGuyJack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NiceGuyJack)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/19 "2001-10-12T06:32:07Z")
If anything, this thread proves what a fantasy religion is. Each poster uses his/her own imagination to paint a picture of what God would be/look like. This confirms my thoughts on religion. Good one **Darqangelle**. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_Wright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 9:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957/20 "2001-10-12T09:30:57Z")
God, being omnipotent, could appear as anything. So, if He needs to show Himself to you, He will appear as whatever you need to see Him as. (Which could, of course, be a She, or even an It.) Of course, God is also omnipresent (it’s in the job description), so He’s _already_ somewhere in your neighbourhood. If you can’t see Him, either He doesn’t want you to, or you’re not looking properly. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-god-hey-where-are-you-going/86957.md?page=2)