# What if I ate this toy? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 19, 2006, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334 "2006-06-19T18:36:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Lama\_Pacos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Lama\_Pacos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lama_Pacos)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/21 "2006-06-19T23:39:35Z")
> [@](#): > > Now I’m curious. If it’s “about 3 or 4 inches across” and actually did grow its advertised 600%, how big would it be? I’m terrible at math, but I’m gonna say it should, as claimed, grow to 18 or 24 inches across. Unless this is one of those obvious-seeming problems that exists to trip up the numerically challenged among us. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/22 "2006-06-19T23:43:21Z")
[QUOTE=Inigo Montoya] - Expandables may take five to ten days to grow to their maximum size. - While expanding they may feel “Slimy”. Don’t worry, it is part of the expaning process and it is completely harmless. Slimy is fun! - Have fun watching the expandables grow! [/QUOTE] Yeah, yeah, if I had a dollar for every time I’ve been told _that_ . . . ---
**Author:** ![Lama\_Pacos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Lama\_Pacos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lama_Pacos)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/23 "2006-06-19T23:45:22Z")
Don’t worry, babe, that’s supposed to happen. Slimy is fun. ---
**Author:** ![Linty\_Fresh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Linty\_Fresh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Linty_Fresh)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/24 "2006-06-19T23:51:04Z")
[QUOTE=Inigo Montoya] - **COLLECT THEM ALL!** [/QUOTE] Are you sure your colon can fit them all? > [@monica](#): > > I’d imagine that you’d be one of those cases that the ER docs would snicker about behind your back. “So this guy came in with a really bad stomache ache and some intestinal blockage, and you’d never believe what we pulled out! The things some people put in their mouths! What on earth was he thinking?” That’s assuming they give him the benefit of the doubt. “_Surrrrre_ you swallowed it.” **Inigo** , my man, you’re gonna make the ass hall of fame. They’ll be talking about you for years. " . . . Yeah, we had to import that proctologist from _Geneva!!_" ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/25 "2006-06-19T23:55:06Z")
You have a choice to make here, Inigo. A child’s toy, or hard science. **YOU** be the decider. Er, did I mention the flashlight? ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/26 "2006-06-20T00:19:50Z")
Indeed, a _live_ octopus. ---
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/27 "2006-06-20T00:58:39Z")
Just imagine checking into the ER: My name is Inigo Montoya. I swallowed an expanding sponge octopus. Prepare to call the producers of the Discovery Channel’s _99 Strangest Things Removed From Human Bodies._ ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/28 "2006-06-20T01:02:26Z")
Doesn’t look like [600%](http://cgi.ebay.com/EXPANDABLES-SEA-CREATURES-STINGRAY-FROM-WALMART-NEW_W0QQitemZ6065904234QQihZ009QQcategoryZ31744QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem#ebayphotohosting) to me. Four times tops. ---
**Author:** ![Lama\_Pacos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Lama\_Pacos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lama_Pacos)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/29 "2006-06-20T03:05:31Z")
No, no, the brown one is the original, and it grows to a size with the same ratio as that of the little yellow one to the big yellow one. I think you’re seeing the big yellow one as the original and the brown one as the final. It is not so. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/30 "2006-06-20T03:13:34Z")
I think I’ve heard of kids swallowing these, and they expanded in some way (like in the throat) which caused them to suffocate and die. Might be an urban legend, but I wouldn’t do it. ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/31 "2006-06-20T04:07:10Z")
Expanding octopus, Pop Rocks and Coke. First man in space without a rocket. ---
**Author:** ![Suburban\_Plankton](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suburban_plankton/32/219_2.png) [@Suburban\_Plankton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Suburban_Plankton)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 6:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/32 "2006-06-20T06:19:44Z")
[QUOTE=carnivorousplant] Doesn’t look like [600%](http://cgi.ebay.com/EXPANDABLES-SEA-CREATURES-STINGRAY-FROM-WALMART-NEW_W0QQitemZ6065904234QQihZ009QQcategoryZ31744QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem#ebayphotohosting) to me. Four times tops. [/QUOTE] Yeah, but that’s a **ray** , not an **octopus**. Totally different dynamic. It’s like comparing apples to oranges, in an expanding-aquatic-animal-toy kind of way. **Revtim** : if it takes up to 10 days to reach full expansion, I don’t think Inigo needs to worry about it so much on the way _down_, as on the way _out_. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/33 "2006-06-20T06:33:26Z")
[QUOTE=carnivorousplant] Doesn’t look like [600%](http://cgi.ebay.com/EXPANDABLES-SEA-CREATURES-STINGRAY-FROM-WALMART-NEW_W0QQitemZ6065904234QQihZ009QQcategoryZ31744QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem#ebayphotohosting) to me. Four times tops. [/QUOTE] As fascinating as the possibilities of consuming expandable toys are, I find myself flabbergasted at the notion of some guy attempting to ebay something he bought at Walmart. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot? If I wanted this toy, why would I not just buy it from Walmart myself, and save the shipping cost? Veering back on topic, I suggest that it is possible that stomach acid might bring the creature to life. If so, an eerie similarity to _Alien_ ensues… ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/34 "2006-06-20T06:38:21Z")
You’d probably live, but it would be a sucker bet. ---
**Author:** ![Throatwarbler\_Mangrove](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8c91f0/32.png) [@Throatwarbler\_Mangrove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Throatwarbler_Mangrove)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/35 "2006-06-20T06:44:55Z")
Two friends of mine did exactly what you are proposing a few years ago, although I believe it was not an octopus but some other expaning animal. AFAIK neither experienced any serious side effects. ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/36 "2006-06-20T07:00:41Z")
Oh sure, swallow an expanding octopus on the say-so of a tentacle beast. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 7:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/37 "2006-06-20T07:48:56Z")
[Hendrix] …Scuse me, while I eat this toy… [/Hendrix] ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 8:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/38 "2006-06-20T08:55:27Z")
For fuck’s sake don’t eat it. I’d hate for this to turn out to be one of those ‘told u i wuz hardcore’ moments. ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/39 "2006-06-20T12:04:43Z")
[QUOTE=Mangetout] For fuck’s sake don’t eat it. I’d hate for this to turn out to be one of those ‘told u i wuz hardcore’ moments. [/QUOTE] Don’t listen to him, **Inigo**. It’s your duty as a _man of science_ to eat that Octopus. ---
**Author:** ![J.Z.Knuckles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ecccb3/32.png) [@J.Z.Knuckles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/J.Z.Knuckles)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2006, 12:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334/40 "2006-06-20T12:15:22Z")
[QUOTE=Winston Smith] Don’t listen to him, **Inigo**. It’s your duty as a _man of science_ to eat that Octopus. [/QUOTE] Good grief, sir. You truly _are_ evil. I can’t help but admire you for it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-if-i-ate-this-toy/361334.md?page=3)