# What Is Attractive To Females **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 19, 2013, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218 "2013-09-19T07:11:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Frazzled](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frazzled/32/3368_2.png) [@Frazzled](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frazzled)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/81 "2013-09-19T19:43:36Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > Heavens to Betsy. WE DONE BEEN TOLD! > > To **Frazzled** : Well I _thought_ you were, but you called him “sweet”, so then I was unsure. There you have it then. 🙂 I see now you didn’t call him sweet, were just saying sweet. I forgave you at sarcastic and funny 🙂 To Gateway - please don’t go! It’s wisdom like yours in this thread that’s making my afternoon fun! Well, your posts and pirate jokes. Now I need to think of a pirate joke that involves Gateway… Well, so much for the rest of _this_ day Do you at least have a hook? Pleeeeaasssee tell me you have a hook! That’s something else women are attracted to if you’re counting! ---
**Author:** ![thenonepercent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@thenonepercent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thenonepercent)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/82 "2013-09-19T19:52:40Z")
Why is it that HUMAN FEMALES perpetuate this misandry of not providing an easy to follow procedural list of attractants so Nice Guys like the OP can input the correct GET SEX code? Gateway, I suggest you check gamefaqs. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/83 "2013-09-19T19:56:53Z")
> [@Frazzled](#): > > I forgave you at sarcastic and funny 🙂 > > To Gateway - please don’t go! It’s wisdom like yours in this thread that’s making my afternoon fun! Well, your posts and pirate jokes. Now I need to think of a pirate joke that involves Gateway… Well, so much for the rest of _this_ day > > Do you at least have a hook? Pleeeeaasssee tell me you have a hook! That’s something else women are attracted to if you’re counting! I love sarcastic wit. If it was a person I would marry it. I fell for my love because of his devastating wit. 🙂 A pirate joke involving Gateway? It’s gotta have “Yaaar…you guys are driving me nuts!” somewhere in it. ---
**Author:** ![Kaio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c68b51/32.png) [@Kaio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaio)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/84 "2013-09-19T20:01:59Z")
> [@Gateway](#): > > I don’t see how saying females is negative sounding. I’m open to try to understand if you are interested in explaining. By the way, I like your posts as they are nonconfrontational and not containing some sort of insult in it somewhere. Thanks Well, there’s this: > [@CrazyCatLady](#): > > Because if there’s one thing women pretty universally DON’T like, it’s explaining why something bothers us and then having someone say “What? What’s the problem? Explain it to me.” \*\* It shows you (the general you) weren’t listening the first time, which is very insulting.\*\* It also presumes we have nothing better to do than to repeat ourselves as many times as it takes for you to actually pay attention, which is demeaning. Furthermore, it takes for granted that we give enough of a crap to take extra time and effort for someone who can’t be arsed to listen to us in the first place, which is presumptuous. And: Female is an adjective, not a noun. It is “othering” language. It’s also [distancing language](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Distancing_language). Distancing language being commonly used for self-deception, it makes it clear that your protestations that “of COURSE females are individuals!” is something you do not actually, truly believe. It is also very commonly used by internet trolls like the pickup artist movement and “men’s rights” activists, who are well known for being loud and obnoxious with their misogyny. Women don’t find misogyny attractive. Even if YOU are not aware of it, we are. The crux here, is that your language is reflective of your attitudes. It’s your attitudes that need to be fixed. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/85 "2013-09-19T20:10:25Z")
> [@Gateway](#): > > One LAST post on this by me (rape jokes and choice of words ) because the topic is derailed. Female is what women are. Male is what men are. That is reality. If you have beef with that, it is simply YOUR rules and not THE rules. > > Different people have different senses of humor. If mine bugs you, then thats how it goes. > > Now quit raping my thread with off topic remarks So basically, you asked for input and advice, you got lots of input and advice, and you didn’t like it, so you rejected it. Advising you on what is and isn’t attractive to women is exactly what your OP asked for, so it’s hardly “off topic”. Most of the advice is good- why not take it? What do you have to lose? ---
**Author:** ![aNewLeaf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ac91a4/32.png) [@aNewLeaf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aNewLeaf)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/86 "2013-09-19T20:13:54Z")
> [@iiandyiiii](#): > > Most of the advice is good- why not take it? What do you have to lose? “Except your virginity?” ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/87 "2013-09-19T20:14:34Z")
> [@Kaio](#): > > Women don’t find misogyny attractive. It’s better than a stick in the eye. Wait, let me reconsider. ---
**Author:** ![Kaio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c68b51/32.png) [@Kaio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaio)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/88 "2013-09-19T20:24:05Z")
> [@Gateway](#): > > We are not all attracted to the same things as a species. How can you carry this much cognitive dissonance in your head and not explode? > [@Gateway](#): > > 1. If I choose to use the word female (oh my goodness!) or joke like that on a PUBLIC message board in a free country, then thats how it is. Then you may resign yourself to never being attractive to a “female” :rolleyes: because you won’t do what it takes to get there. That’s fine, but if that’s your choice, don’t whine to us about it. ---
**Author:** ![Cheshire\_Human](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Cheshire\_Human](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheshire_Human)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/89 "2013-09-19T21:26:00Z")
> [@Kaio](#): > > What Is Attractive To Females? To start with, not referring to us as “females” as if you are a Ferengi. Well, did you happen to notice that his OP referred to: > [@Gateway](#): > > **Many animals** (peacocks, bowerbirds, lions) have a set standard for finding mates attractive. Humans have this? Note the “Many animals”, followed by a list of animal species that have very well noted purely visual sexual-selection criteria. And he is right about the mate-selection in the evolution of the mating behavior of species in question. Then he asks if there are visual or other superficial characteristics leading to humans making their initial ‘am I attracted to that dweeb enough to check him/her out’ mating decisions based on similar superficial characteristics. He asks a legitimate question. So it’s _not_ as though he’s just asking about _human_ ‘females’. He’s asking about generalizations between ‘women’ (human type females) and ‘females’ (of many species) in general. Unless you want to be lumped in with sows, cows, and ewes, and have all of those referred to as ‘women’, I think you’re taking offense where any _reasonable_ reading indicates that said offense is rather unreasonable. I think you’re being just a _bit_ unreasonable in your judgment of the OP. But that’s just me. I’m probably a male-chauvinist-pig for noticing the distinction in the OP, and giving it a charitable (and reasonable) interpretation, that doesn’t resurrect ‘mysogynygate’. ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/90 "2013-09-19T21:28:11Z")
If you really want to know what attracts the female of the species most often, nothing has worked as well historically as what you get when you type shift-4. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/91 "2013-09-19T21:31:40Z")
> [@Cheshire\_Human](#): > > So it’s _not_ as though he’s just asking about _human_ ‘females’. He’s asking about generalizations between ‘women’ (human type females) and ‘females’ (of many species) in general. You might have noticed that some of the followup posters expressed annoyance at being compared to other species at all or challenged the notion that there was a universal trait aside from perhaps good health and symmetrical features. ---
**Author:** ![Kaio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c68b51/32.png) [@Kaio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaio)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/92 "2013-09-19T21:36:21Z")
> [@Cheshire\_Human](#): > > He’s asking about generalizations between ‘women’ (human type females) and ‘females’ (of many species) in general. Well, there’s his first mistake. Why would any intelligent person think there’s any valid generalizations to be made WITHIN humanity, much less across multiple different species? > [@](#): > > Unless you want to be lumped in with sows, cows, and ewes, You mean like he did, as you ever-so-helpfully just pointed out? ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/93 "2013-09-19T21:59:20Z")
> [@Kaio](#): > > Well, there’s his first mistake. Why would any intelligent person think there’s any valid generalizations to be made WITHIN humanity, much less across multiple different species? They generally have skin? > [@StusBlues](#): > > nothing has worked as well historically as what you get when you type shift-4. shift-4 Ok, I typed it. Now when do I get the womens? ---
**Author:** ![thenonepercent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@thenonepercent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thenonepercent)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/94 "2013-09-19T22:08:35Z")
> [@Drunky\_Smurf](#): > > They generally have skin? I’m typing this from a burn ward you insensitive bastard. ---
**Author:** ![Gateway](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/dbc845/32.png) [@Gateway](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gateway)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/95 "2013-09-19T22:37:05Z")
So a few observations as a followup to my original question as to the contribution others have made: (Oh yeah there is also supposed to be what is known as a fitness indicator but that is for a different post.) ATTRACTIVENESS People are attracted to the people other people are attracted to Being able to carry on a conversation They like to be considered as individuals Good nature Confidence Humor Interesting Naturally at ease around women Rapport Looks Character Integrity Productive Stability ---
**Author:** ![Gateway](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/dbc845/32.png) [@Gateway](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gateway)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/96 "2013-09-19T22:43:19Z")
And for some reason they seem to tend not to like rape. ---
**Author:** ![just\_j](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ed8c4c/32.png) [@just\_j](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/just_j)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/97 "2013-09-19T23:01:32Z")
I think we all know that there is an attractiveness standard set by the media that is really not reachable by ordinary mortals – BUT in the real world, unless you are way out of bounds, the most attractive quality can be simply a light in the eyes which says, “I think you are beautiful, and I would like to get to know you better.” Of course, if you are not Chris Hemsworth, you probably shouldn’t be pining after Natalie Portsman. Just sayin’… ---
**Author:** ![Cheshire\_Human](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Cheshire\_Human](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheshire_Human)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/98 "2013-09-19T23:02:29Z")
> [@Ferret\_Herder](#): > > You might have noticed that some of the followup posters expressed annoyance at being compared to other species at all or challenged the notion that there was a universal trait aside from perhaps good health and symmetrical features. You _seriously_ didn’t expect me to actually _read_ this nutty thread, did you? I believe you are expecting waaaayyy too much ‘give-a-shit’ on my part. Ain’t gonna happen. Deal with it. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/99 "2013-09-19T23:06:26Z")
> [@Cheshire\_Human](#): > > You _seriously_ didn’t expect me to actually _read_ this nutty thread, did you? > > I believe you are expecting waaaayyy too much ‘give-a-shit’ on my part. Ain’t gonna happen. Deal with it. Thanks for sharing. ---
**Author:** ![aNewLeaf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ac91a4/32.png) [@aNewLeaf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aNewLeaf)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2013, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218/100 "2013-09-19T23:14:24Z")
> [@Gateway](#): > > So a few observations as a followup to my original question as to the contribution others have made: > > (Oh yeah there is also supposed to be what is known as a fitness indicator but that is for a different post.) > ATTRACTIVENESS > People are attracted to the people other people are attracted to > Being able to carry on a conversation > They like to be considered as individuals > Good nature > Confidence > Humor > Interesting > Naturally at ease around women > Rapport > Looks > Character > Integrity > Productive > Stability Yep, that’s a good list. Fitness is a whole 'other thing, as a man you can qualify on fitness alone if you have a rare special type of body. But most men have to be able to carry on an interesting funny conversation while being casual and confident. Having a job and a life help. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-attractive-to-females/669218.md?page=6)