# What is "cosmetic gynecology"? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [April 28, 2005, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573 "2005-04-28T17:17:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2005, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/61 "2005-05-01T04:53:30Z")
Ah, I see. Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2005, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/62 "2005-05-01T18:12:23Z")
I seem to recall Benjamin Franklin writing once on the subject, and claiming that the nether regions of a woman were the last to show the signs of age. Between this and a claimed greater degree of enthusiasm and experience, Ben stated his preference for older women. And **nevermore** , your nether regions look absolutely gorgeous. Trust me on this. ---
**Author:** ![Savannah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@Savannah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Savannah)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2005, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/63 "2005-05-01T18:56:54Z")
A Googe Image Search on the phrase “cheeseburger crotch” did not match any documents. I think I’m glad, though I curse my curiosity. Cosmetic surgery to make one’s female genitals match some idealised standard is stooopid, in my opinion. Vulvas are like flowers. Each blossom is lovely in its own way, and no two are identical. ---
**Author:** ![istara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e79b87/32.png) [@istara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/istara)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2005, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/64 "2005-05-01T19:54:25Z")
\Vulvas are like flowers. Each blossom is lovely in its own way, and no two are identical.\ That’s lovely. It reminds me of the line in 1984 when he sees the young woman as a bud, and a larger older woman as a full-blown rose. ---
**Author:** ![irishgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@irishgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irishgirl)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2005, 9:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/65 "2005-05-02T09:52:07Z")
**Guin** -she was fine…well as fine as you can be when you’re married to a man like that. FGM is illegal in Ireland, so it is policy in all the maternity and women’s hospitals not to re-infibulate women. Unsurprisingly there is some resistance to this. ---
**Author:** ![minor7flat5](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/minor7flat5/32/258_2.png) [@minor7flat5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minor7flat5)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2005, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/66 "2005-05-02T12:48:00Z")
> [@Stranger On A Train](#): > > But it does offer the opportunity to quote from one of my favorite films: > > “Faces are a doddle compared to tits and ass. No hairline.” > > and > > “There’s been a little complication with my complication.” > > Stranger Now I’ll spend the rest of the day listening to the soothing voice of Gal Costa singing _Aquarela do Brasil_ in my mind… Not bad, actually. ---
**Author:** ![D.E.S.K.Top668](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f07891/32.png) [@D.E.S.K.Top668](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D.E.S.K.Top668)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/67 "2005-05-04T03:29:14Z")
It seems that most posters in this thread seem to think that “cosmetic gynecology” is only for changing the appearance of a woman’s vagina. Just because the word cosmetic is in the phrase “cosmetic gynecology” doesn’t mean it’s **just** for show. My wife (whose permission I have to post this) is interested in having it done. Due to the length of her labia, it’s uncomfortable for her to wear certain types of pants, otherwise well fitting undergarments, um…rub her the wrong way, and she has to be careful when she sits on her bicycle. For her, and I’ll bet other women in the same situation, it has nothing to do with appearance, it’s about comfort. Peace - DESK ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/68 "2005-05-04T06:29:19Z")
One would think so, considering the rate of caesareans. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 9:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/69 "2005-05-04T09:44:27Z")
> [@Johanna](#): > > Speaking of Eastern traditions, I like the menarche ceremony in _The Red Tent_ by Anita Diamant. > > … > > That’s a better idea. Let _women_ deflower the girl _gently_, and leave men and their silly patriarchal values out of it. Then when she does get married, she won’t get pain of defloration from the first time they have sex. For this rational, humane system the Israelites substituted their Biblical values that increase pain, humiliation, and chattel subjugation for the women… and domination for the men. No thanks! This may work a treat in some antique Babylonian idyll, but personally I can’t envisage any eleven-year-old in our climate being overjoyed at being dragged out by a bunch of women to lie naked in a muddy field, on a night probably cold enough to turn the skin purple, before being broken in with a Toblerone. :dubious: Since the entire episode cited is purely imaginary, it does seem harsh to rag on the patriarchy for being down on it. As an aside, has anyone ever noticed how many things male-oriented religions can find to talk about before they start on their reproductive systems? Just sayin’. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![irishgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@irishgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irishgirl)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 11:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/70 "2005-05-04T11:05:58Z")
**ouryL** -or you could look at the research that suggests elective c-section for twins, premature labours and breech presentations is better for the baby than a vaginal delivery. All the hospitals that refuse to do VBAC also increase the c-section rates. Again, they’ve got their own reasons. It’s not just about being “too posh to push”, it’s about weighing up all your probablities and coming to the conclusion that an elective c-section, rather than a long labour and difficult instrumental delivery or emergency section may be in the best interests of both mother and baby. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/71 "2005-05-04T14:05:40Z")
> [@D.E.S.K.Top668](#): > > It seems that most posters in this thread seem to think that “cosmetic gynecology” is only for changing the appearance of a woman’s vagina. Could be about changing the appearance of a person’s face. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/72 "2005-05-04T14:55:41Z")
> [@Malacandra](#): > > This may work a treat in some antique Babylonian idyll, but personally I can’t envisage any eleven-year-old in our climate being overjoyed at being dragged out by a bunch of women to lie naked in a muddy field, on a night probably cold enough to turn the skin purple, before being broken in with a Toblerone. This brought tears to my eyes. I want to bear your child, even without cosmetic gynecological surgery. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/73 "2005-05-04T15:31:21Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > This brought tears to my eyes. > > I want to bear your child, even without cosmetic gynecological surgery. > > Regards, > Shodan Is it OK if I whack off to a twice-life-size poster of Seven of Nine and mail you the results? Logistically that’s probably the nearest I can get. 😃 Meanwhile, the supposition that any kind of gynie procedure must necessarily be kinder and gentler if performed as a rite-of-passage ( :eek: ) by a group of older women on a young girl rather flies in the face of observed facts as they pertain to FGM as it’s often performed, e.g. and for instance by an old harridan with a rusty tin-can lid. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Pullet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@Pullet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pullet)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/74 "2005-05-04T17:03:11Z")
> [@Malacandra](#): > > Meanwhile, the supposition that any kind of gynie procedure must necessarily be kinder and gentler if performed as a rite-of-passage ( :eek: ) by a group of older women on a young girl rather flies in the face of observed facts as they pertain to FGM as it’s often performed, e.g. and for instance by an old harridan with a rusty tin-can lid. ☹ While I agree that I _would not_ want my mother or any relative performing any sort of medical proceedure on me, I think the point of the original quote was that this particular kid felt comfortable enough with her environment that her deflowering was not outright painful. The same situation can be achieved if the young girl and her boyfriend are sufficiently patient and mentally supportive of one another. Or liquor-plyed I make long sentence things. my $0.02 ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/75 "2005-05-04T17:47:42Z")
Let’s see - a deeply moving spiritual experience involving the wise old crones of the tribe, under the full moon at the vernal equinox and a ceremonially-blessed, elaborately-carved ebony phallus handed down for generations, or six Purple Zombies and the back seat of his mother’s Toyota. Tough call. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Pullet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@Pullet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pullet)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/76 "2005-05-04T17:52:11Z")
Your right. Bad Pullet. Never make jokes again. Especially don’t tack on jokes to statements that acutally support your attacker’s view. ---
**Author:** ![phall0106](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/phall0106/32/5934_2.png) [@phall0106](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phall0106)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/77 "2005-05-04T18:38:23Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > Let’s see - a deeply moving spiritual experience involving the wise old crones of the tribe, under the full moon at the vernal equinox and a ceremonially-blessed, elaborately-carved ebony phallus **handed down for generations** , or six Purple Zombies and the back seat of his mother’s Toyota. > > Tough call. > > Regards, > Shodan _bolding mine_ HANDED DOWN??? Like someone else used it? Ewwwww… ---
**Author:** ![Pullet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@Pullet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pullet)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/78 "2005-05-04T19:07:09Z")
That was my next question. In an ancient short story I read once, the towns people were convinced that it was better for a girl’s virginity to be lost to a stranger. Something about reducing the emotional damage should the relationship with one’s first sexual partner sour. So, when the girl was old enough, she was given a very pretty dress by the female relatives, who all love her dearly, and gently escorted to a twilit field to wait for the local blueballs to come by. Afterwards, the girl was free to date her sweetheart. Unless the girl was ugly. Then she had to wait 'til Blueballs was purple. Like **Malacandra** said, just because it’s socially sanctioned and traditional doesn’t mean it can’t be sick. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/79 "2005-05-04T20:24:34Z")
Sorry if it came across as an attack - I was just funnin’ witcha. Sometimes I come across as an asshole even when I don’t intend it. Here’s the part I left out 🙂 Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2005, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573/80 "2005-05-04T21:43:59Z")
> [@Anita Diamant](#): > > The oil eased the entry, and the narrow triangle fit perfectly as it entered me Archæogynæcological (\*) discovery of note: Babylonian women had triangular vaginas. :dubious: Of all the odd shapes to use. Surely being made woman with a three-cornered file would be on a par with giving birth to a square-headed baby? :eek: - A neologism, I admit, but how often do you get to use two ashes in one word? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-cosmetic-gynecology/301573.md?page=5)