# What is it about our arse that we are the only animals in the world that need to wipe it **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [March 24, 2016, 11:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016 "2016-03-24T11:22:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![snowthx](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowthx/32/10660_2.png) [@snowthx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snowthx)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2016, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/21 "2016-03-24T19:36:00Z")
> [@md2000](#): > > … Ricahrd Leaky … heh-heh, Dick Leaky, heh-heh ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2016, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/22 "2016-03-24T20:26:32Z")
There is something unique about our armpits, too, which need to be sprayed with pore-clogging substances and adorned with masking fragrances. And only humans have breath so foul it needs mouthwash and toothbrushing. And humans are the only animals that need to remove boogers with lacy hankies or processed forest products… ---
**Author:** ![snowthx](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowthx/32/10660_2.png) [@snowthx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snowthx)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2016, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/23 "2016-03-24T21:13:35Z")
> [@jtur88](#): > > And humans are the only animals that need to remove boogers with lacy hankies or processed forest products… Need? There is the option of using one’s own lung-power, the way nature intended. ---
**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2016, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/24 "2016-03-24T22:09:34Z")
> [@Surreal](#): > > Huh? > I think you have this exactly backwards. “Huh” right back at you. From the [wiki](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dietary_fiber) on fiber: > [@wiki](#): > > insoluble fiber’s ability (via its passive hygroscopic properties) to increase bulk, soften stool, and shorten transit time through the intestinal tract > … > the United States National Academy of Sciences, Institute of Medicine, suggest that adults should consume 20–35 grams of dietary fiber per day, but the average American’s daily intake of dietary fiber is only 12–18 grams I should say though, even though I put this as my #1 thing, the list was in no particular order. I don’t think it’s the most important factor. ---
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2016, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/25 "2016-03-24T22:44:40Z")
> [@umop\_ap\_sdn](#): > > Or not thankful - if we were physically able to clean back there the way dogs and cats do, we probably would, and therefore wouldn’t think it’s icky so there’d be one less thing in day to day life to be disgusted at. Insert “Well, he’s _your_ dog” punchline here? ---
**Author:** ![TSBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/77aa72/32.png) [@TSBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TSBG)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2016, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/26 "2016-03-24T22:46:01Z")
My wife and daughter both have long hair (or at least I suppose they are the source) and on occasion my dog will pass a turd that remains attached by a hair that runs into the fundament. The dog’s immediate reaction is to attempt “scooting” which would, of course, make the mess worse. I am usually quick enough to use a poop bag to grasp the nugget and withdraw the hair. ---
**Author:** ![Surreal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eada6e/32.png) [@Surreal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surreal)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2016, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/27 "2016-03-24T23:30:03Z")
> [@Mijin](#): > > “Huh” right back at you. From the [wiki](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dietary_fiber) on fiber: Um, how exactly does a softer stool or a decreased transit time reduce the need for wiping your ass? ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2016, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/28 "2016-03-25T00:05:11Z")
> [@jtur88](#): > > And only humans have breath so foul it needs mouthwash and toothbrushing. Dogs can have pretty foul breath sometimes. And there are toothbrushes and toothpastes intended for use by dog owners to brush their pets’ teeth. ---
**Author:** ![harmonicamoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/65b543/32.png) [@harmonicamoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmonicamoon)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2016, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/29 "2016-03-25T00:27:40Z")
> [@Surreal](#): > > Um, how exactly does a softer stool or a decreased transit time reduce the need for wiping your ass? When you consume sufficient fiber, your stools make a _clean break_. No peanut butter! Saves on forest products. Give it a try. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2016, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/30 "2016-03-25T01:06:01Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > Haven’t you even seen a dog dragging it’s ass on the ground? Or your carpet? One of my cats does this semi-regularly. They also lick their rear ends if they feel the urge to do so. We don’t have tails, either. Some animals use those to, ahem, divert things. SFW. [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/P1Flr7JhPow/hqdefault.jpg?sqp=-oaymwEmCOADEOgC8quKqQMa8AEB-AH-BIAC4AOKAgwIABABGGUgXygvMA8=&rs=AOn4CLDl5IJC1ve1k38Yp6ilEKZVHQ-X6w "Hippo gets explosive diarrhea.") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P1Flr7JhPow) ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2016, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/31 "2016-03-25T02:55:37Z")
> [@Surreal](#): > > Um, how exactly does a softer stool or a decreased transit time reduce the need for wiping your ass? A diet high in fiber results in not just softer, but slippery stools that are well formed, and drop off with little residue left behind. Really. Low fiber diets result in hard stools that scrape their way slowly through the anus or sticky stools that cling. Either way, more residue. TMI, but when I wipe after I’ve actually remembered to take all my fiber supplements for a couple of days, there’s nothing on the paper. So I wipe again to make sure, because I’m a silly monkey of habit. ---
**Author:** ![spamforbrains](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@spamforbrains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spamforbrains)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2016, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/32 "2016-03-25T02:56:06Z")
> [@](#): > > Human beings don’t ‘need’ to wipe their arses. Just like animals we could get by fine without cleaning them. We choose to wipe our arses for all sorts of reasons but the act isn’t essential for life. as a long-time animal person, I can assure you this is true. Dogs, cats, horses, cows, sheep, often get really gross butts but they just don’t really care. Even if they have a bout of diarrhea that ends up with the entire back half covered with feces. Eventually it dries out and flakes off. It posses no health risk, it’s just something that bothers modern humans. Probably didn’t bother your ancestors. They bathed rarely and were probably covered with animal manure, mud, sweat, and let’s not even think about it all of the time. ---
**Author:** ![md2000](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/73ab20/32.png) [@md2000](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/md2000)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2016, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/33 "2016-03-26T15:39:32Z")
Wasn’t it the movie “Road to Wellville” where the Dr. Kellogg character boasts " I eat no meat, only raw vegetables and whole grains, and my turds have the consistency and smell of a fresh muffin…" ---
**Author:** ![crowmanyclouds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crowmanyclouds/32/19884_2.png) [@crowmanyclouds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crowmanyclouds)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2016, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/34 "2016-03-26T16:16:30Z")
> [@md2000](#): > > Wasn’t it the movie “Road to Wellville” where the Dr. Kellogg character boasts " I eat no meat, only raw vegetables and whole grains, and my turds have the consistency and smell of a fresh muffin…" Which is why _Kellogg’s Muffins_ never caught on as part of a balanced breakfast! ☹ CMC fnord! ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2016, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/35 "2016-03-26T16:27:44Z")
> [@TSBG](#): > > My wife and daughter both have long hair Dude, I am so glad that this post went in a different direction than I first thought. ---
**Author:** ![Corporal\_Clegg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Corporal\_Clegg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corporal_Clegg)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2016, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/36 "2016-03-26T16:53:38Z")
A hoof makes even getting paper off the role a saga. Bears use a bunny to wipe if one is handy. We wipe (or clean up in whatever way) because crap does not always come out solidly with enough mucus to make for a relatively clean dump. Animals don’t really give a shi+ about shi++ing. They actually make judgements about the health of each other by the smells of piss and shi+. To us, other people’s shi+ just stinks most foul. It is a measure of one’s hygiene and social adeptness to not catch a whiff of shi+ or an eau de phartois (as it were). But make no mistake, we ARE animals–we are just mostly in denial about that and wiping ass is part of it. ---
**Author:** ![GusNSpot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gusnspot/32/436_2.png) [@GusNSpot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GusNSpot)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2016, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/37 "2016-03-26T17:56:12Z")
> [@Corporal\_Clegg](#): > > A hoof makes even getting paper off the role a saga. Bears use a bunny to wipe if one is handy. We wipe (or clean up in whatever way) because crap does not always come out solidly with enough mucus to make for a relatively clean dump. Animals don’t really give a shi+ about shi++ing. They actually make judgements about the health of each other by the smells of piss and shi+. To us, other people’s shi+ just stinks most foul. It is a measure of one’s hygiene and social adeptness to not catch a whiff of shi+ or an eau de phartois (as it were). But make no mistake, we ARE animals–we are just mostly in denial about that and wiping ass is part of it. ↑ ↑ ↑ This… Butt I like the bunny way also because it feels so good. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![spamforbrains](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@spamforbrains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spamforbrains)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2016, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/38 "2016-03-26T18:46:14Z")
> [@](#): > > Quote: > Originally Posted by Surreal View Post > Um, how exactly does a softer stool or a decreased transit time reduce the need for wiping your ass? > A diet high in fiber results in not just softer, but slippery stools that are well formed, and drop off with little residue left behind. Really. Low fiber diets result in hard stools that scrape their way slowly through the anus or sticky stools that cling. Either way, more residue. I agree with this 100%. It works with dogs, too, but backwards-most dry dog foods are grain-based and have fiber added to produce a fairly large, soft poop that tends to leave butt residue behind and smears on the grass when you try to pick it up. If you feed a dog a basically fiber-free diet based on meat, organs, and bones, the dog produces very hard, small poops that leave no butt residue behind. Nor do they leave sticky smears on the grass when you go to pick them up. ---
**Author:** ![Ponch8](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponch8/32/9883_2.png) [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2016, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/39 "2016-03-26T20:36:33Z")
It seems like the more fiber I eat, the MORE times I need to wipe my buttocks. ---
**Author:** ![spamforbrains](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@spamforbrains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spamforbrains)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2016, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016/40 "2016-03-27T01:22:24Z")
> [@](#): > > Quote: > Originally Posted by Boyo Jim View Post > Haven’t you even seen a dog dragging it’s ass on the ground? Or your carpet? Dogs do this because of impacted anal glands, not shit stuck to their butts. You need to see a vet to get them cleared out before they become infected. People don’t have anal glands. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-about-our-arse-that-we-are-the-only-animals-in-the-world-that-need-to-wipe-it/750016.md?page=3)