# What is it with men and sexual abuse of children? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 18, 2012, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595 "2012-07-18T04:01:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2012, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/81 "2012-07-19T20:25:47Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > If I heard someone say that to their kid, I’d look at the kid, point at mom, and say “starting with her!” :eek: I didn’t even know what the fuck to say. I’m not a parent. I do remember clearly my parents saying things like that, and I either was scared or, as this kid seemed to be doing, figured it was bullshit. And then when you start thinking your parents are bsing you, you start to wonder it about everything they say. ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/82 "2012-07-20T01:06:12Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > My coworker says this exact thing - she won’t let her daughter sleep over a friend’s house if mommy is not going to be around. Even better, when the kid was at the office one day long ago, Mom was on the phone, and the kid went to the bathroom by themself. In the middle of the day, in an office building, populated with men and women. When the kid came back, Mom said, “You shouldn’t go to the bathroom by yourself. Bad people are waiting there to take you away from me!” > > :eek: Nice. Give the kid a complex. > Hell, my own mother wouldn’t let me sleep over someone’s house if only dad was there. My father-in-law does things like this, and it drives me batshit fucking insane. he keeps telling my kid that people are waiting to snatch her off the street and sell her for money. In god damn fucking Singapore. What are you supposed to do? tell her that Grandad is a crock of shit? Yeah, that’s not gonna fly on so many levels. After that? ---
**Author:** ![Shoujin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoujin/32/3884_2.png) [@Shoujin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoujin)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/83 "2012-07-20T01:37:28Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > My father-in-law does things like this, and it drives me batshit fucking insane. > > he keeps telling my kid that people are waiting to snatch her off the street and sell her for money. In god damn fucking Singapore. > > What are you supposed to do? tell her that Grandad is a crock of shit? Yeah, that’s not gonna fly on so many levels. > > After that? So much for my summer trip to Singapore. ---
**Author:** ![Covered\_In\_Bees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@Covered\_In\_Bees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Covered_In_Bees)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/84 "2012-07-20T02:07:53Z")
Conversely, I’m planning my next vacation right now! EDIT: One of the selling points of taking vacations to different countries is always “enjoy the local cuisine” is it not? Who wants front row seats in Hell? You want 'em, I got 'em! And boy am I loaded with 'em, whole inventory must go! ---
**Author:** ![Belowjob2.0](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Belowjob2.0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Belowjob2.0)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/85 "2012-07-20T02:11:37Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > I’ll be in my bunk . . . Bravo! Where’s the devil smiley when you need one? ---
**Author:** ![Battle\_Pope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@Battle\_Pope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Battle_Pope)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/86 "2012-07-20T02:19:06Z")
> [@Shoujin](#): > > So much for my summer trip to Singapore. Picking up or dropping off? ---
**Author:** ![Shoujin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoujin/32/3884_2.png) [@Shoujin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoujin)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/87 "2012-07-20T02:47:42Z")
> [@Battle\_Pope](#): > > Picking up or dropping off? A little of this, a little of that. I’m Flexible… but not as flexible as..:eek: …goin’ to hell. Carry on! ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/88 "2012-07-20T03:14:13Z")
> [@gamerunknown](#): > > It’s sorta weird that you’re training underage girls you previously checked out at some store. If I, who is harmless, am checking them out, you can bet your bippy that are other people who aren’t harmless checking them out as well. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/89 "2012-07-20T03:36:18Z")
I blame the stripper poles on elementary school playgrounds. They hang a ball on a rope on them thinking we don’t know what’s really up. ---
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/90 "2012-07-20T03:41:43Z")
Baby-teeth are less sharp? ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/91 "2012-07-20T03:53:47Z")
> [@Covered\_In\_Bees](#): > > Conversely, I’m planning my next vacation right now! > > EDIT: One of the selling points of taking vacations to different countries is always “enjoy the local cuisine” is it not? > > Who wants front row seats in Hell? You want 'em, I got 'em! And boy am I loaded with 'em, whole inventory must go! If it’s local cuisine you want, Singapore rocks. And be sure to let me know - will show you some great “local eateries” that are not part of the tourist belt. (I wrote a foodie magazine) ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/92 "2012-07-20T04:07:21Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > What are you supposed to do? tell her that Grandad is a crock of shit? Yeah, that’s not gonna fly on so many levels. Tell her that sometimes Grandad says things one should not really believe, that’s one of them, and she should ask you when she isn’t sure about something Grandad says. My mother used to be one of the people to whom my nephew went with complex questions… until she used that as an excuse to obliquely insult his maternal family once too many. “Daddy, why does Grandma M say those strange things?” “I’m sorry son, sometimes your Grandma M doesn’t think straight. You can still believe her when she talks about your homework, though.” ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 10:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/93 "2012-07-20T10:25:04Z")
I was at the playground yesterday. A woman approached me and asked which child was mine. I explained that I had yet to decide. ---
**Author:** ![Wendell\_Wagner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8491ac/32.png) [@Wendell\_Wagner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wendell_Wagner)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 10:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/94 "2012-07-20T10:43:57Z")
People, what is the point of the snideness directed at the OP? The motto of the SDMB is “Fighting Ignorance”, not “Treating Ignorant People Like Dirt For The Fun Of It”. Yes, I know that a lot of people think that the Internet is their only chance to insult people each day. They know that if they were to say the same sort of nasty remarks they get away with on the Internet to someone’s face that they would get beaten to a pulp and if they were to say them in print that they would be sued for every cent they own. The OP isn’t someone who spontaneously decided that every man must be a child abuser. This is probably someone who spends most of their time listening to cable news channels where they are constantly screaming about the terrible crimes that someone, somewhere has committed. These news sources know that the best way to keep their viewers watching is to keep them in a constant state of terror. This is why they try to make them think that various terrible crimes are all about them and are something new, when actually they are probably slowly decreasing. This was a teaching moment for us. We could have told the OP that the amount of child sexual abuse is not increasing. It’s probably decreasing. We could have taught her to quit watching those cable news channels all the time and to learn to look up statistics on crimes rather than relying on news anchors and commentators who are constantly shouting about the terrible state of the world. Instead, what you’ve probably done is drive her from the SDMB. She will now go around telling other people that the cable channels are right, that there are child abusers all around, and the people on the SDMB are probably all abusers themselves. She’ll always be in a state of ignorance now because you people felt it necessary to get in your daily dose of kicking other people around. ---
**Author:** ![bucketybuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@bucketybuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bucketybuck)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 11:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/95 "2012-07-20T11:11:12Z")
I for one feel deeply sorry that we did not live up to Wendell Wankers vision of the SDMB. ---
**Author:** ![gamerunknown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/6bbea6/32.png) [@gamerunknown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gamerunknown)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 12:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/96 "2012-07-20T12:08:37Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > I’m not sure why you’d even continue associating, even indirectly, with someone who accused you of being a potential pedophile. Didn’t you read the OP? All men are potential paedophiles. ---
**Author:** ![Double\_Foolscap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/85e7bf/32.png) [@Double\_Foolscap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Double_Foolscap)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/97 "2012-07-20T12:17:12Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > I think you should provide us with a detailed list of places where men might sexually abuse children…! That would be the butt, Bob. ---
**Author:** ![JKellyMap](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jkellymap/32/15880_2.png) [@JKellyMap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JKellyMap)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/98 "2012-07-20T12:31:37Z")
> [@BlinkingDuck](#): > > Reminds me of a friend of my wife who has a daughter who was friends with my daughter. My wife was out of town but my daughter wanted a sleep over and her daughter was invited. When she found out my wife was out of town she refused to let her daughter sleep over because she didn’t trust her with me if my wife wasnt around. No offense…just being safe. > > Several months later she invited my kids (daughter and son) to a party. My son said he didn’t want to go and so I said my daughter could go but not my son because I couldn’t trust her with my son. You never know what she might do to him, yaknow. No offense, just being safe. > > Wife’s friend was EXTREMELY angry and livid. Never really forgave me for that insult and to this day won’t talk to me. > > Why, I don’t know. Everyone knows that older women abuse little boys. They can’t help it you know. Something built into women I guess. Just can’t trust them. > > She should have understood and accepted that. I love you! ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/99 "2012-07-20T12:40:22Z")
> [@Double\_Foolscap](#): > > That would be the butt, Bob. Well played, sir or madam. Very well played indeed. This is turning out to be the funniest discussion of child sexual abuse EVAR!!! ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2012, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/100 "2012-07-20T13:21:21Z")
> [@Wendell\_Wagner](#): > > People, what is the point of the snideness directed at the OP? The motto of the SDMB is “Fighting Ignorance”, not “Treating Ignorant People Like Dirt For The Fun Of It”. It depends a lot on what forum it’s posted to. This is the pit. The place where “treating people like dirt for the fun of it” is a requirement. Had this been Great Debates, the discussion would be very different. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595.md?page=6)