# What is it with men and sexual abuse of children? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 18, 2012, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595 "2012-07-18T04:01:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2012, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/141 "2012-08-19T19:19:14Z")
> [@LadyMadonna](#): > > Yes, I started this thread in Great Debates, but the site admin moved it to the pit. And I stopped participating in this thread for awhile because of too many pompous posters with anger issues. Too toxic. I just wanted a lively, thought-provoking debate. You’re a moron with projection issues. That’s the basic answer. You have been answered time and again in this thread pointing out that this is not a MALE issue and you’re wrong to accuse all men of doing this. If you choose not to listen to this and call those people “pompous” and accuse them of having anger management issues, this only shows that the issue lies within you and you aren’t willing to see it. You’re the one with anger and hate issues and you’re projecting them on people who refuse to join into your hate fest. ---
**Author:** ![Wendell\_Wagner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8491ac/32.png) [@Wendell\_Wagner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wendell_Wagner)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2012, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/142 "2012-08-19T19:44:50Z")
LadyMadonna writes: \> You KNOW that for every reported case of child sexual abuse, there are \> hundreds that are not reported. Cite an authoritative source for this claim. \> For every male priest, coach or activities leader that is caught abusing, there \> are dozens more that roam the land free. Cite an authoritative source for this claim. \> And probably 1000 more that fantasize about it without acting on it. Cite an authoritative source for this claim. ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2012, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/143 "2012-08-19T19:59:30Z")
> [@LadyMadonna](#): > > I just wanted a lively, thought-provoking debate. > Can’t they just go find a knot in a tree somewhere and play out their fantasy there?? Can you see how these 2 statements don’t reconcile? You can’t just say you want a thought provoking debate, you have to make thought provoking statements. But to answer your question, ‘just say no to socially prescripted sex, even if it means you have to find a tree’ has pretty much failed throughout human history. Singling out one group for failing to do what humans have routinely failed to do is great for outrage, but not much for solutions. ‘Why do some people fixate on children and can we change that?’ is a useful question, but one that’s been frustratingly hard to answer, so not as much fun. OTOH, we do lots of recreational outrage in the pit, so have fun but don’t be surprised if not everyone takes you seriously. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2012, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/144 "2012-08-19T20:44:56Z")
Then too, LadyMadonna is just another hate spewing troll giving us the same crap. 1. Make racist or hate filled post. 2. Get expected (for this board) lack of agreement. 3. Proclaim that s/he is just asking questions/ trying to have an honest debate, and what’s with all these pompous hate filled people who responded to an innocent question? That shit doesn’t fly here. ---
**Author:** ![Freakenstein](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b782af/32.png) [@Freakenstein](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freakenstein)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2012, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/145 "2012-08-19T20:48:08Z")
Didn’t read much of this, but I have something to say. I hate children, always had, always will. They are noisy and greedy, ill-mannered psychos. The last thing I would do is to touch a kid in ‘that way’. So this is what happened: I was biking on the countryside when I saw this kid maybe three-four years old on a lawn, no shirt, just shorts. No adults around and there was a few meters to a road, no ditch between. It occurred to Me that this toddler might easily wander off to the road and get run over by a car. So what to do? I got the hell out of there, no-one is going to see Me approaching a half-naked little kid. It was a damn nightmare to wait the next day’s newspapers to see if there was a story about a little kid killed by a car. So Ladymadonna and all Your kind, with that attitude You’re not helping anybody. ---
**Author:** ![gamerunknown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/6bbea6/32.png) [@gamerunknown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gamerunknown)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2012, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/146 "2012-08-19T22:53:28Z")
> [@Freakenstein](#): > > They are noisy and greedy, ill-mannered psychos. …and yet they’re just so _irresistible_… ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/147 "2012-08-20T00:54:13Z")
> [@LadyMadonna](#): > > Yes, I started this thread in Great Debates, but the site admin moved it to the pit. And I stopped participating in this thread for awhile because of too many pompous posters with anger issues. Too toxic. I just wanted a lively, thought-provoking debate. Listen, lady. I know that at least two posters in this thread have been sexually abused in their childhood, hence might know a thing or two that you don’t about this issue. Neither has been taking you seriously. That should tell you something about the value of the “thought provoking” content of your post. ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/148 "2012-08-20T00:55:22Z")
> [@Freakenstein](#): > > Didn’t read much of this, but I have something to say. > I hate children, always had, always will. They are noisy and greedy, ill-mannered psychos. The last thing I would do is to touch a kid in ‘that way’. > So this is what happened: I was biking on the countryside when I saw this kid maybe three-four years old on a lawn, no shirt, just shorts. No adults around and there was a few meters to a road, no ditch between. It occurred to Me that this toddler might easily wander off to the road and get run over by a car. So what to do? I got the hell out of there, no-one is going to see Me approaching a half-naked little kid. > It was a damn nightmare to wait the next day’s newspapers to see if there was a story about a little kid killed by a car. > > So Ladymadonna and all Your kind, with that attitude You’re not helping anybody. I feel your pain. Awhile back I was in the local Barnes n Noble and this toddler’s wondering around, just tall enough to push the button for the elevator. It opens and he walks in, I look around for the adult, and see no one. I’m thinking, ‘no way I’m getting in with him alone, but what if he pushes the down button and gets off on another floor?’ So there I am, ex peds ICU nurse, current ER with a well deserved reputaion for establishing rapore with kids so I can finesse them through a painful or scary experience, leaning agaist the elevator door hoping the kid will wander back out before some nutcase lands on me. ---
**Author:** ![AlienVessels](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ba8739/32.png) [@AlienVessels](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AlienVessels)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/149 "2012-08-20T01:06:35Z")
> [@Carmady](#): > > Things are getting to the point where male adults cannot be left alone with children, (male or female), anywhere at anytime. What the hell is it with men wanting to sexually abuse kids anyway??? > **[Yahoo News: Latest and Breaking News, Headlines, Live Updates, and More](https://news.yahoo.com/)** > > The latest news and headlines from Yahoo News. Get breaking news stories and in-depth coverage with videos and photos. > [@](#): > > An Australian man, Daniel McCluskie, is lashing out at Qantas Airlines, saying the company humiliated him by forcing him to move because he was seated next to a 10-year-old girl traveling without her parents. The story surfaced days after reports that another man, a firefighter named Johnny McGirr, had been forced to trade seats with a woman on another carrier, Virgin Australia, because he had been seated next to two unaccompanied boys, ages 8 and 10. We’re there. And it’s not even “alone”. ---
**Author:** ![Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jimmy_Chitwood)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/150 "2012-08-20T01:34:54Z")
> [@outlierrn](#): > > I feel your pain. Awhile back I was in the local Barnes n Noble and this toddler’s wondering around, just tall enough to push the button for the elevator. It opens and he walks in, I look around for the adult, and see no one. I’m thinking, ‘no way I’m getting in with him alone, but what if he pushes the down button and gets off on another floor?’ So there I am, ex peds ICU nurse, current ER with a well deserved reputaion for establishing rapore with kids so I can finesse them through a painful or scary experience, leaning agaist the elevator door hoping the kid will wander back out before some nutcase lands on me. Was he hot? ---
**Author:** ![LadyMadonna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/eb8c5e/32.png) [@LadyMadonna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LadyMadonna)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/151 "2012-08-20T03:06:37Z")
> [@clairobscur](#): > > Listen, lady. I know that at least two posters in this thread have been sexually abused in their childhood, hence might know a thing or two that you don’t about this issue. Neither has been taking you seriously. That should tell you something about the value of the “thought provoking” content of your post. Well, I know of a third. And I take myself seriously. People can avoid addressing this issue all they want. Wait until it happens to your kid, or your niece or nephew. You’ll be feeling differently about it then. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/152 "2012-08-20T03:36:08Z")
No one is avoiding the issue. We’re pointing out the truth of it. Which YOU are ignoring. ---
**Author:** ![Palo\_Verde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/65b543/32.png) [@Palo\_Verde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Palo_Verde)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/153 "2012-08-20T04:54:55Z")
Child abuse (including sexual abuse) has been steadily decreasing for years. Yes, one is too many, etc., but we should be celebrating in the streets that it has decline by over a third! > [@](#): > > Substantiated cases of child sexual > abuse decreased from a national estimated peak of 149,800 cases in 1992 to > 103,600 cases in 1998, a decline of 31 > percent. > u A decline in substantiated cases has > occurred in the majority of States, with > no clear regional pattern. Out of 47 > States with complete data, 36 recorded > a decline of more than 30 percent since > their peak year. The average decline > for all States was 37 percent. > u For most States, the decline was gradual, > rather than abrupt, and occurred over > several years. > u Although cases of other types of child > maltreatment have also declined in recent years, the decrease in child sexual > abuse cases has been more marked. > Substantiated cases of physical abuse > declined 16 percent from a 1995 peak, > compared with a 31-percent decline in > child sexual abuse cases. > u In addition to the decline in the number of substantiated cases, child > sexual abuse reports also decreased > from an estimated 429,000 in 1991 to > 315,400 in 1998, a 26-percent decline. > u Possible explanations for the decline > include a real underlying decline in the > incidence of child sexual abuse or > changes in attitudes, policies, and standards that have reduced the amount of > child sexual abuse being reported and > substantiated. It is possible that both of > these processes are affecting trends in > child sexual abuse. > **[184741.pdf](https://www.ojp.gov/pdffiles1/ojjdp/184741.pdf)** > > 144.17 KB [http://www.acf.hhs.gov/news/press/2011/decreased\_child\_abuse\_neglect.html](http://www.acf.hhs.gov/news/press/2011/decreased_child_abuse_neglect.html) ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/154 "2012-08-20T05:10:33Z")
> [@LadyMadonna](#): > > Well, I know of a third. And I take myself seriously. People can avoid addressing this issue all they want. Wait until it happens to your kid, or your niece or nephew. You’ll be feeling differently about it then. It happened to me. And my brother. And my other brother. WITH MY MOTHER AND GRANDMOTHER’S COMPLICITY, YOU BLOODY MORON! And to my cousins, WITH MY AUNT AND MY GRANDMOTHER’S COMPLICITY! The person who did it was my grandfather WHO HAD BEEN ABUSED BY HIS MOTHER. Now go fuck yourself sideways with a sharpened cypress. Thank you. ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/155 "2012-08-20T05:16:03Z")
> [@LadyMadonna](#): > > You’ll be feeling differently about it then. If by that you mean we’ll be eager to return the counterproductive paranoia of the McMartin witch hunt days, most of us certainly hope not. Tell me, what do _you_ think we should be doing to address the problem? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/156 "2012-08-20T05:33:03Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > I was at the playground yesterday. A woman approached me and asked which child was mine. I explained that I had yet to decide. Bravo. ---
**Author:** ![LadyMadonna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/eb8c5e/32.png) [@LadyMadonna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LadyMadonna)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/157 "2012-08-20T06:52:25Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > It happened to me. And my brother. And my other brother. > > WITH MY MOTHER AND GRANDMOTHER’S COMPLICITY, YOU BLOODY MORON! > > And to my cousins, WITH MY AUNT AND MY GRANDMOTHER’S COMPLICITY! > > The person who did it was my grandfather WHO HAD BEEN ABUSED BY HIS MOTHER. > > Now go fuck yourself sideways with a sharpened cypress. Thank you. While I understand the source of your anger, it is misdirected in this instance. And definitely uncalled for. I never stated that women don’t abuse (or assist in allowing abuse). But it’s a well known fact that the vast majority of sexual abusers of children are male. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/158 "2012-08-20T07:07:16Z")
> [@LadyMadonna](#): > > But it’s a well known fact that the vast majority of sexual abusers of children are male. Worse, the vast majority of them are _human!!_ Obviously we should never trust humans anywhere near children. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/159 "2012-08-20T07:07:16Z")
> [@LadyMadonna](#): > > But it’s a well known fact that the vast majority of sexual abusers of children are male. Even if that’s true, it doesn’t necessarily follow that _the vast majority of males are sexual abusers_. ---
**Author:** ![LadyMadonna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/eb8c5e/32.png) [@LadyMadonna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LadyMadonna)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595/160 "2012-08-20T07:11:22Z")
t > [@Palo\_Verde](#): > > Child abuse (including sexual abuse) has been steadily decreasing for years. Yes, one is too many, etc., but we should be celebrating in the streets that it has decline by over a third! > [https://www.ncjrs.gov/pdffiles1/ojjdp/184741.pdf](https://www.ncjrs.gov/pdffiles1/ojjdp/184741.pdf) > [http://www.acf.hhs.gov/news/press/2011/decreased\_child\_abuse\_neglect.html](http://www.acf.hhs.gov/news/press/2011/decreased_child_abuse_neglect.html) Thanks, but I don’t consider statistics from 1998 to be relevant. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-it-with-men-and-sexual-abuse-of-children/628595.md?page=9)