# What is the most bizarre tattoo you've seen? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 27, 2005, 8:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382 "2005-07-27T08:36:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![davenportavenger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/5f8ce5/32.png) [@davenportavenger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davenportavenger)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/41 "2005-07-28T02:24:53Z")
Didn’t see it in person, but there’s a guy out there with a full-color tattoo covering his entire penis of a dragon. The head of the penis was pierced as well, and lies right where the nose of the dragon is. It’s a rather nice dragon, but DAMN. It’s floating somewhere around the Internet, don’t really care to scan through a bunch of porn sites to find it though. I also know of (never seen) a guy with knuckle tattoos that spell out “ROOT BEER.” ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/42 "2005-07-28T02:28:56Z")
NSFW, two click rule applies: Here’s the [dragon penis](http://www.toomuchsexy.org/index/weblog/2003/06/01/). Scroll to where it says Penis Tattoo, and click on it. ---
**Author:** ![ErinPuff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dbc845/32.png) [@ErinPuff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ErinPuff)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/43 "2005-07-28T02:32:26Z")
There’s a guy who has “Weird Al” Yankovic’s face and signature tattooed on his ankle. As if that weren’t enough, he added the pictures and signatures of three of Al’s band members. [Here’s the page on his site about them.](http://weirdal.0catch.com/tattoo.html) ---
**Author:** ![Liz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/liz/32/17737_2.png) [@Liz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liz)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/44 "2005-07-28T02:33:44Z")
Holy shit, that’s cool. Of course, I don’t have to, uh, handle it, so… y’know. YMMV and all that. ---
**Author:** ![Ashes\_Ashes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/db5fbb/32.png) [@Ashes\_Ashes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashes_Ashes)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/45 "2005-07-28T02:45:39Z")
> [@Rock-n-Rolga](#): > > Like **Hal Briston** , I used to see a girl working in my university’s library who had an extremely detailed, almost photorealistic tattoo of a toaster. One of those 1950’s chrome types. Never could work up the nerve to ask her if she had a thing for classic kitchen appliances; too afraid that maybe she’d pull up her skirt to reveal a deep fat fryer inked on an unmentionable place… If that’s the toaster you get when you ‘convert’ x number of people to homosexuality, the International Order of Gay People may want to make that more clear to it’s members. My gay friends are looking forward to _actual_ cinnamon toast! The puzzle girl reminds me I’ve seen the guy who’s tattooed a tiger (? You’d think I would remember that tattoo better) on his face. Filed his teeth to points and is getting whisker implants soonly. ---
**Author:** ![Savannah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@Savannah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Savannah)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/46 "2005-07-28T03:05:31Z")
> [@chaoticdonkey](#): > > NSFW, two click rule applies: Here’s the [dragon penis](http://www.toomuchsexy.org/index/weblog/2003/06/01/). > > Scroll to where it says Penis Tattoo, and click on it. That leaves me speechless. How much would that have HURT, anyway? I came in to post that the stupidest tattoos (in my opinion only, the owners, I’m sure, feel differently) are of tattooed penises. Especially with flowers and cartoon characters on them. I would be too busy laughing at it to have sex with it. DISCLAIMER: My opinion only; tattoo thyself all you like, live and let live, and all that good stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/47 "2005-07-28T03:09:39Z")
> [@](#): > > The first I only saw in a photo. A girl had herself tattooed, hairline to toes and out to her fingertips, in puzzle-piece outlines. It was a very neat effect, almost hypnotic, because she had this very clear, white skin, and the light blue she used stood out distinctly without being loud, as such. I’ve seen pictures of this woman. She has a skin disorder and she feels intensive tattooing helps it. ---
**Author:** ![Crowbar\_of\_Irony\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f08c70/32.png) [@Crowbar\_of\_Irony\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crowbar_of_Irony_3)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/48 "2005-07-28T03:18:32Z")
I saw this tattoo, in Mandarin, on the back of one ex-gangster… “Mother’s love is the greatest”. Yeah, gangsters usually have tattoos to intimdate people. They go for soaring dragons, goth looking demons and the like. But “Mother’s love is the greatest”…? ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/49 "2005-07-28T03:24:16Z")
The tattoo that sticks out most in my mind is Tim Commerford’s tattoo (he’s in Audioslave, formerly of Rage Against the Machine) When I first saw it many moons ago (Rolling Stone, perhaps?), it was just covering his left shoulder, chest and back. Now it’s both sides of his body. I can’t seem to find a good pic of it, but [here’s an OK one](http://members.tripod.com/black_hole_wolf/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/spin_february_2003_page_1_edited.jpg) [and two more](http://members.tripod.com/black_hole_wolf/timmy_c/) [and a good one of half his back](http://www.audioslavica.net/1Centries/timcollectible.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/50 "2005-07-28T03:30:21Z")
My favorite dumbass tattoos are prolly the ones that Steve-O has. On [this page](http://www.vanishingtattoo.com/tattoo/celeb-steve-o_1.htm) is his famous “prison sex prevention” tattoo (himself, on his own back) and further down, just next to the one that says “Your Name” is the tattoo that he had done in a Hummer that Henry Rollins drove across the Salt Flats at like 100 mph. Steve-O may be an idiot, but at least he doesn’t mind if we laugh at him. Loudly. To his face. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/51 "2005-07-28T03:48:41Z")
A woman I worked with at a telemarketing firm had an unfinished Tweety Bird tattoo. Always be sure to bring enough money to the tattoo parlor to get the whole thing done! ---
**Author:** ![Silentgoldfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@Silentgoldfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silentgoldfish)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/52 "2005-07-28T06:04:26Z")
> [@Snowboarder Bo](#): > > My favorite dumbass tattoos are prolly the ones that Steve-O has. > > On [this page](http://www.vanishingtattoo.com/tattoo/celeb-steve-o_1.htm) is his famous “prison sex prevention” tattoo (himself, on his own back) and further down, just next to the one that says “Your Name” is the tattoo that he had done in a Hummer that Henry Rollins drove across the Salt Flats at like 100 mph. > > Steve-O may be an idiot, but at least he doesn’t mind if we laugh at him. Loudly. To his face. 😃 What the HELL is he doing in that picture at the bottom of the page?! ---
**Author:** ![Rubystreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Rubystreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubystreak)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/53 "2005-07-28T06:41:10Z")
This is a true story. After graduating college, I waited tables. I noticed the cook, Dave, had the name Kristi tattooed on his hand. Looked like it was done with india ink and a needle. A short time later, a waitress started working there… named Krisit, with “Dave” tattooed on her hand, in the same place, the same way. I didn’t say anything for several weeks, and then I just had to point it out. Yep, they were in love back in high school and tattooed their names on each other… and then _didn’t recognize each other at all_ when they ran into each other again, 20 years later. Not the slightest flicker of recognition. They seemed rather shocked, sheepish, and downright embarrassed when I had them show each other and the epiphany happened for both of them. :rolleyes: If that’s not a cautionary tale about tattoing names on your body, I don’t know what is. ---
**Author:** ![picunurse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 7:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/54 "2005-07-28T07:47:20Z")
One night we got an unconscious John Doe, who had a 1 inch tall Christmas tree on the glans of his penis. Never found out why 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/55 "2005-07-28T08:15:01Z")
> [@Snowboarder Bo](#): > > My favorite dumbass tattoos are prolly the ones that Steve-O has. […] Steve-O may be an idiot, but at least he doesn’t mind if we laugh at him. Loudly. To his face. 😃 But why does he have it in for [Bill Gaines](http://www.thescreamonline.com/photo/photo4-1/geerdes/billgaines.html)? ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 8:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/56 "2005-07-28T08:37:26Z")
> [@Silentgoldfish](#): > > What the HELL is he doing in that picture at the bottom of the page?! lmao That, my friend, is a stunt that he calls **The Career Ender**. Wherein he uses a stapler to fasten his nutsack to his thigh. No shit. It’s the last thing on [his first DVD](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B00006FMEA/qid=1122539911/sr=1-2/ref=sr_1_2/102-9333229-2313701?v=glance&s=dvd) ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 8:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/57 "2005-07-28T08:38:35Z")
> [@Beware of Doug](#): > > But why does he have it in for [Bill Gaines](http://www.thescreamonline.com/photo/photo4-1/geerdes/billgaines.html)? Dunno… maybe it’s his way of paying homage to the creator of Mad Magazine? ---
**Author:** ![melondeca](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@melondeca](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/melondeca)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/58 "2005-07-28T13:44:35Z")
I have seen several very strange tattoos. My friend has a major problem with the Grateful Dead so he had Dead bears tattooes on both calves. One is being burned at the stake while the other has a hatchet imbeded in its skull. I saw a girl with a ruler with the words “Don’t Lie” tattooed on her inner thigh. When I got my last tattoo, I asked my artist about the most ridiculous tattoo he had ever done. He said that a guy got a picture on his upper arm of Taz masturbating while riding a skateboard. WTF? Although, I must say, if a tattoo has meaning for you or if it makes you happy and you think you can live with it for the rest of your life…go for it. ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/59 "2005-07-28T15:32:20Z")
I went to school with a guy who had a hard time quitting drinking. What finally worked for him was his decision that whenever he needed a drink he would get a skull tattoo instead. By the time that I met him he was sleeved and front and backed with skulls, all done in black ink, each about as big as a quarter and trimmed out to make a teardrop of bare skin around each skull. He had also stayed sober for three years. A friend had a flaming ear of corn done on his right shoulder. Hey, he was in a cornpone cowpunk band! I once ran across a woman in a Home Depot, late at night, who had a curlyque/vine pattern, almost a tribal version of what is sometimes done with henna, done in black ink over her entire body. Sure, it was a strong statement, but it was also incredibly feminine. Also, the [Lizardman](http://bmeworld.com/amago/) used to pick either his or a friend’s kid up from my son’s day care (I only saw him there once or twice. For what it’s worth, I remember him as being red, not green.) ---
**Author:** ![wheelie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b4bc9f/32.png) [@wheelie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wheelie)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2005, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382/60 "2005-07-28T20:43:48Z")
Damn, second page and nobody’s mentioned [The Leopard Man](http://www.vanishingtattoo.com/tattoo/celeb-leopard.htm). [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-bizarre-tattoo-youve-seen/314382.md?page=4)