# What is the most incomprehensible, pseudo-smart sentence you've ever read? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 17, 2018, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499 "2018-09-17T21:40:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Oedipus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Oedipus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oedipus)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2018, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/1 "2018-09-17T21:40:05Z")
I want to be really clear about what I’m asking…Not totally illogical because of a grammar mistake or because it sticks out as not making sense in the context…I mean a pseudo-scientific, “every other word capitalized” kind of gobbeldy-gook. My friend and I are having a contest… Example: > [@](#): > > “It is not the case that, . . . the completed Idea needs an external Other (Nature) to sustain the complete and closed circle of self-mediation. Nature is, rather, the mark of the non-All of the Idea’s totality.” ---
**Author:** ![EllisDee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellisdee/32/4531_2.png) [@EllisDee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EllisDee)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2018, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/2 "2018-09-17T22:07:21Z")
Does it have to be from a book? The only reason I ask is because the first season of True Detectives could be the poster child for this type of self-indulgence. [Time is a flat circle](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j60l_BbQHJY) Full disclosure: I _loved_ the first season of True Detectives. ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2018, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/3 "2018-09-17T22:08:47Z")
Does it have to have been written in earnest? ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2018, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/4 "2018-09-17T22:12:02Z")
"It depends upon what the meaning of ‘is’ is. (Bill Clinton) ---
**Author:** ![DSYoungEsq](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c6cbf5/32.png) [@DSYoungEsq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSYoungEsq)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2018, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/5 "2018-09-17T22:34:19Z")
Almost any sentence from _Ulysses_. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2018, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/6 "2018-09-17T22:56:31Z")
I’ve always been fond of the technical description of the [Turbo-encabulator](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Turboencabulator): The original machine had a base plate of prefabulated amulite, surmounted by a malleable logarithmic casing in such a way that the two main spurving bearings were in a direct line with the panametric fan. The latter consisted simply of six hydrocoptic marzlevanes, so fitted to the ambifacient lunar waneshaft that side fumbling was effectively prevented. ---
**Author:** ![Uniqueorn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/uniqueorn/32/2807_2.png) [@Uniqueorn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uniqueorn)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2018, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/7 "2018-09-17T23:09:40Z")
Sonja: But judgement of any system or a priori relation of phenomena exists in any rational or metaphysical or at least epistemological contradiction to an abstract and empirical concept such as being or to be or to occur in the thing itself or of the thing itself. Boris: Yeah, I’ve said that many times. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2018, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/8 "2018-09-18T00:11:05Z")
> [@DSYoungEsq](#): > > Almost any sentence from _Ulysses_. Assembly instructions from almost any Chinese product. ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2018, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/9 "2018-09-18T00:21:55Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > "It depends upon what the meaning of ‘is’ is. > (Bill Clinton) That’s definitely not gobbledygook. It’s perfectly understandable, just wrong. ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2018, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/10 "2018-09-18T00:29:21Z")
I decisioned the necessifaction of the resignatory action/option due to the dangerosity of the trendflowing of foreign policy away from our originatious careful coursing towards consistensivity, purposity, steadfastnitude, and above all, clarity. – Jeff MacNeilly, in his cartoon of Alexander Haig ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2018, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/11 "2018-09-18T00:40:26Z")
Have you ever listened to the lyrics of anything by Gilbert & Sullivan? > [@](#): > > I know our mythic history, King Arthur’s and Sir Caradoc’s; > I answer hard acrostics, I’ve a pretty taste for paradox, > I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus, > In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous ---
**Author:** ![Sloe\_Moe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sloe\_Moe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sloe_Moe)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2018, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/12 "2018-09-18T01:27:41Z")
Only that it’s rather comprehensible but still: “In the Nuts (unground), (other than ground nuts) Order, the expression nuts shall have reference to such nuts, other than ground nuts, as would but for this amending Order not qualify as nuts (unground) (other than ground nuts) by reason of their being nuts (unground)”. ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2018, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/13 "2018-09-18T02:41:46Z")
In French? [http://graner.net/nicolas/salocin/ten.renarg//:ptth](http://graner.net/nicolas/salocin/ten.renarg//:ptth) It’s a long poem, very obscure- and sophisticated-sounding, but actually the entire thing is a palindrome. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2018, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/14 "2018-09-18T03:14:27Z")
Our own **Leo Bloom** has penned more than a few such sentences that would be in the running. However, I don’t have the time nor the inclination to sift through the myriad offerings to find the prime example. ETA: I want to be clear I mean this in good fun. I like LB. I mean no disrespect or hostility. I think he knows full well what he does. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2018, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/15 "2018-09-18T03:43:03Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > I’ve always been fond of the technical description of the [Turbo-encabulator](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Turboencabulator): > > The original machine had a base plate of prefabulated amulite, surmounted by a malleable logarithmic casing in such a way that the two main spurving bearings were in a direct line with the panametric fan. The latter consisted simply of six hydrocoptic marzlevanes, so fitted to the ambifacient lunar waneshaft that side fumbling was effectively prevented. “Side fumbling” sounds as if it refers to someone who wishes to have an extramarital affair but is too clumsy to actually do so. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2018, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/16 "2018-09-18T03:47:37Z")
Um, 14 posts and no postmodernism? > [@](#): > > We can clearly see that there is no bi-univocal correspondence between linear signifying links or archi-writing, depending on the author, and this multireferential, multi-dimensional machinic catalysis. The symmetry of scale, the transversality, the pathic non-discursive character of their expansion: all these dimensions remove us from the logic of the excluded middle and reinforce us in our dismissal of the ontological binarism we criticised previously. [http://www.physics.nyu.edu/sokal/dawkins.html](http://www.physics.nyu.edu/sokal/dawkins.html) ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2018, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/17 "2018-09-18T06:37:18Z")
I’m not sure if this technically qualifies, but it’s definitely in the right universe. [Strangest English Sentences: See 20 of the Most Confusing Sentence in the English Language](https://www.distractify.com/fyi/2015/04/13/19NMFR/the-19-most-mind-blowing-sentences-in-the-english-language-1197891759). (It’s number 8 on a list of 20 strangest sentences of the english language. Interesting read either way). “This exceeding trifling witling, considering ranting criticizing concerning adopting fitting wording being exhibiting transcending learning, was displaying, notwithstanding ridiculing, surpassing boasting swelling reasoning, respecting correcting erring writing, and touching detecting deceiving arguing during debating”. ---
**Author:** ![Marine\_One](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/marine_one/32/3461_2.png) [@Marine\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marine_One)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2018, 10:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/18 "2018-09-18T10:51:33Z")
How about classical music reviews? Always thought these people were talking down to anyone reading them. Like this guy: “If Mahler’s music would speak Yiddish, it would be perhaps unintelligible to me. But it is repulsive to me because it acts Jewish. This is to say that it speaks musical German, but with an accent, with an inflection, and above all, with the gestures of an eastern, all too eastern Jew. So, even to those whom it does not offend directly, it can not possibly communicate anything. One does not have to be repelled by Mahler’s artistic personality in order to realize the complete emptiness and vacuity of an art in which the spasm of an impotent mock-Titanism reduces itself to a frank gratification of common seamstress-like sentimentality.” Huh? ---
**Author:** ![Zakalwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zakalwe/32/270_2.png) [@Zakalwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zakalwe)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2018, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/19 "2018-09-18T11:08:18Z")
> [@Marine\_One](#): > > Huh? He doesn’t like Mahler’s music and may actually dislike the man himself. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2018, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499/20 "2018-09-18T11:47:53Z")
> [@Zakalwe](#): > > He doesn’t like Mahler’s music and may actually dislike the man himself. 🙂 The only good thing about Mahler is that Alben Berg is even worse. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-most-incomprehensible-pseudo-smart-sentence-youve-ever-read/821499.md?page=2)