# What is the oddest thing you've said to yourself today? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 17, 2009, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704 "2009-08-17T06:13:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![NRichards](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@NRichards](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NRichards)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2009, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/1 "2009-08-17T06:13:58Z")
Inspired by a recent thread about pets (great thread!). Mine would have to be, “AH! Pee-pee!” I was tidying up around work, and almost knocked over a box of drug-tests waiting to be shipped. Let’s hear it Dopers! ---
**Author:** ![lucky\_henry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bc8723/32.png) [@lucky\_henry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lucky_henry)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/2 "2009-08-18T01:50:05Z")
Farts should not be chunky. ---
**Author:** ![silvermist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@silvermist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silvermist)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/3 "2009-08-18T01:56:19Z")
It’s been so hot and humid for the past few days and I was thinking at work how nice it would be to call maintenance and order an icy cold mist making device installed over my desk. And when they laughed, I could tell them that if they can’t do that they’ll have to come upstairs and spritz me with a spray bottle every ten mins. ---
**Author:** ![Serenata67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/serenata67/32/10646_2.png) [@Serenata67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Serenata67)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/4 "2009-08-18T02:18:31Z")
Oh Junior Mint! (I wanted to swear, but I was at work and that’s what came out.) ---
**Author:** ![NRichards](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@NRichards](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NRichards)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/5 "2009-08-18T02:31:21Z")
> [@Serenata67](#): > > Oh Junior Mint! (I wanted to swear, but I was at work and that’s what came out.) That’s the most adorable curse I’ve ever heard! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/6 "2009-08-18T02:47:04Z")
While smelling the rear end of my pants to see whether it’s time to dry clean them (and deciding against it): “Well, if anyone gets that close to my butt, then they deserve what they get.” ---
**Author:** ![MonkeyMensch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@MonkeyMensch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MonkeyMensch)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/7 "2009-08-18T02:53:51Z")
At the worst I could always live in the back of my truck. ---
**Author:** ![Serenata67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/serenata67/32/10646_2.png) [@Serenata67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Serenata67)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/8 "2009-08-18T02:57:50Z")
> [@NRichards](#): > > That’s the most adorable curse I’ve ever heard! 😃 It was so random… I was gonna, well, use the Lord’s name in vain and I was committed to the “J” sound. And for some reason Junior Mint came out. I think I like it… ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/9 "2009-08-18T12:50:41Z")
Thoracic effluvia. The wife and I are making Frankenstein’s lab for ween and it sounded like a good label to put above a knob on the bubbler prop. ---
**Author:** ![Carl\_Corey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Carl\_Corey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carl_Corey)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/10 "2009-08-18T16:01:48Z")
> [@lucky\_henry](#): > > Farts should not be chunky. User name+post=giggle ---
**Author:** ![Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/bc8723/32.png) [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unauthorized_Cinnamon)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2009, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/11 "2009-08-18T16:29:46Z")
Does it have to be out loud? Because if internal monologue counts, I say crazy shit all day long. (And I’m starting to hear my internal voice as Gordon Freeman, from watching Freeman’s Mind on Youtube.) ---
**Author:** ![cdsilv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cdsilv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cdsilv)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2009, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/12 "2009-08-19T19:05:27Z")
“I’m nominating that mule f\*cker from Georgia” – internal monologue while perusing the “Most Embarrassing Public Official” thread… ---
**Author:** ![Never\_Say\_Dice](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ee59a6/32.png) [@Never\_Say\_Dice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Never_Say_Dice)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2009, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/13 "2009-08-19T22:43:37Z")
I’ve been waking myself for a month now when I shout in my sleep\*\* “Giant frogs in my soup!”\*\* I like to eat frogs, so it’s not a nightmare, I’m ordering a meal. ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2009, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/14 "2009-08-19T23:11:05Z")
> [@Never\_Say\_Dice](#): > > I’ve been waking myself for a month now when I shout in my sleep\*\* “Giant frogs in my soup!”\*\* > I like to eat frogs, so it’s not a nightmare, I’m ordering a meal. If you shout “snnzzzzz hhe bEAVERS AND DUCKS!” then you’re a sports fan. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2009, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/15 "2009-08-20T02:35:53Z")
“Maybe it would be cheaper to just charter a plane?” Trying to solve a really tough logistical problem at work. Never thought I’d say “cheap” and “charter” together. And if internal counts: “What the #e!! did that fox just say?” In Mary Poppins, when they are riding the Carousel horses and interrupt the fox hunt, the fox yells something at the chasing dogs. I can never catch it, despite having this movie playing at least once a day in my house for the last two weeks. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2009, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/16 "2009-08-20T02:42:27Z")
“I have a corkscrew on my pocketknife. But it’s short and skinny. Kinda like [Bernie Madoff’s dick](http://gothamist.com/2009/08/19/book_really_does_tell_all_about_mad.php), except it’s a corkscrew.” ---
**Author:** ![RadicalPi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/radicalpi/32/9806_2.png) [@RadicalPi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RadicalPi)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2009, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/17 "2009-08-20T07:00:56Z")
Once while reading, although not today, I said to myself, “Wow. This is really interesting. I’ve never thought of it like this before.” Then I flipped back to the front page and realized I was actually editing one of my own articles. ---
**Author:** ![Girl\_From\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3da27b/32.png) [@Girl\_From\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girl_From_Mars)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2009, 8:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/18 "2009-08-20T08:57:09Z")
Describing my 7-month pregnant tummy - “it’s like there’s a giant breast implant in there.” ---
**Author:** ![Fearless\_Leader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9fc348/32.png) [@Fearless\_Leader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fearless_Leader)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2009, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/19 "2009-08-20T21:16:12Z")
“There are people dressed as Vikings playing cornhole outside my building”. There were. ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2009, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704/20 "2009-08-20T21:27:51Z")
Unvoiced sarcasm: “The project is now ‘on the back burner’? That just means the room is filling with gas, and we’re all eventually going to suffocate at best, and death by fireball at worst.” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-oddest-thing-youve-said-to-yourself-today/506704.md?page=2)