# What is the plural of "penis"? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cecil's Columns/Staff Reports\ **Created:** [January 9, 2004, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637 "2004-01-09T14:04:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![tccIII](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecae2f/32.png) [@tccIII](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tccIII)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2004, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/1 "2004-01-09T14:04:11Z")
What a wonderful answer! Thanks for being careful about Latin and other plurals but also acknowledging that usage over the years means that sometimes ‘incorrect’ forms are to be preferred. ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2004, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/2 "2004-01-09T15:57:24Z")
The Staff Report in question is [What is the plural of “penis”?](http://www.straightdope.com/mailbag/mplurals.html) And welcome to the boards, **tccIII**. ---
**Author:** ![fluidtherapy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/50afbb/32.png) [@fluidtherapy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fluidtherapy)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2004, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/3 "2004-01-09T16:52:34Z")
Excellent answer – I mean, content-wise, not just correctness of such (not that I would know). I suddenly have a hankerin’ to go learn Latin. ---
**Author:** ![nick.baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e47c2d/32.png) [@nick.baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nick.baker)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2004, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/4 "2004-01-09T19:41:01Z")
Bravo!! and re.: fluidtherapy: Ditto! Hmmm… Were plurals of these mentioned? ---
**Author:** ![John\_W.Kennedy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_w.kennedy/32/1031_2.png) [@John\_W.Kennedy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_W.Kennedy)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2004, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/5 "2004-01-09T23:05:15Z")
Actually, “virus” appears to have been a freak – 2nd-declension neuter ending in -us. There are two other such words, “pelagus” (the sea) and “vulgus” (the rabble), and maybe one or two more, but none of them have plurals that could be generalized from. (“Pelagus” means “the sea” as opposed to “the land” – no plural.) It got into English by a roundabout route. Before the invention of the electron microscope, it was clear that some diseases were spread by something that behaved like bacterial colonies, but couldn’t be seen in even the most powerful microscope, or caught in even the finest filter. The name “filterable virus” was attached to this class of mysterious whozis. Eventually, we found out what it was, and the name “virus” became attached to the individual virus thingy. But the thingies, unlike “poison” (in the sense that the word has in a sentence like “Poison is a bad thing to have around the house”) were individual critters, and thus needed a plural in English that the word had never needed in Latin. Hence: “viruses”. And, of course, it’s the same for the metaphorical viruses that metaphorically infect computers. ---
**Author:** ![MEBuckner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mebuckner/32/2896_2.png) [@MEBuckner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MEBuckner)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/6 "2004-01-11T17:50:14Z")
Another great column, **bibliophage**! > [@](#): > > Some Hebrew plurals such as _seraphim_ and _cherubim_ exist alongside the English-style plurals like _seraphs_ and _cherubs_. There are some interesting examples of double plurals in the King James Bible from those. [Isaiah 6:2](http://bible.gospelcom.net/cgi-bin/bible?passage=ISA+6:2&language=english&version=KJV&showfn=on&showxref=on): > [@](#): > > Above it stood the seraphims: each one had six wings; with twain he covered his face, and with twain he covered his feet, and with twain he did fly. (And also [Isaiah 6:6](http://bible.gospelcom.net/cgi-bin/bible?passage=ISA+6:6&language=english&version=KJV&showfn=on&showxref=on).) And a whole bunch of examples of [“cherubims”](http://bible.gospelcom.net/cgi-bin/bible?search=cherubims&SearchType=AND&version=KJV&restrict=&StartRestrict=&EndRestrict=&rpp=25&language=english&searchpage=0&x=11&y=8). Shakespeare uses the form [“cherubins”](http://www.bartleby.com/cgi-bin/texis/webinator/sitesearch?query=cherubins&filter=col70). ---
**Author:** ![dogbutler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dogbutler/32/428_2.png) [@dogbutler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dogbutler)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2004, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/7 "2004-01-12T02:10:56Z")
> [@](#): > > Penis is a third declension noun, not second declension. These nouns often end in -is in the singular and -es in the plural. Does this mean that the plural of _Elvis_ is _Elves_? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Josh\_dePlume](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Josh\_dePlume](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Josh_dePlume)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2004, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/8 "2004-01-12T02:53:37Z")
From the staff report: > [@](#): > > It is true that many standard English words have entered the language through mistakes (uncle from nuncle, pea from pease, etc.) My sources say that _uncle_ comes from the Latin _avunculus_, via the Old French _oncle_. One English word that did arise in this way is _apron_ (_a napron_ taken incorrectly as _an apron_. Another, in the reverse direction, is _nickname_, from _an eke name_. ---
**Author:** ![bibliophage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bibliophage/32/7615_2.png) [@bibliophage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bibliophage)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2004, 7:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/9 "2004-01-12T07:19:38Z")
The uncle/nuncle mistake was pointed out in another thread, [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=234156](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=234156) I expect the report to be corrected in the next few days. ---
**Author:** ![Wooglin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f0a364/32.png) [@Wooglin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wooglin)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2004, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/10 "2004-01-13T14:37:11Z")
The language columns are always sweet. A+ woot ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Arctus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/71c47a/32.png) [@Tom\_Arctus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Arctus)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2004, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/11 "2004-01-13T15:44:19Z")
I do not have Latinate _testes_. I have good old English testicles (“the boys” to my close friends). And while we’re on the subject, of course you all know where that word comes from (_testify_) and why (the ancient Hebrew habit of touching them when swearing an oath ;j ). ---
**Author:** ![vd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b19c9b/32.png) [@vd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vd)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2004, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/12 "2004-01-13T15:50:44Z")
What is the proper pronunciation of -ides? Does it move the accented syllable? The one that I run into is _ephemeris_. **Bibliophage** ’s report would seem to indicate that one of the plurals I hear (_ephemerides_) is probably the correct Latin plural. My experience with it is in GPS papers and articles, where it is the list of parameters used to calculate the satellite positions. It also applies more generically to calculating the positions of whatever heavenly body, but I’m not as familiar with the common usage in other fields. From what I gather, the astronomical use would be that an entire publication of parameters for many bodies is an _ephemeris_. I guess a shelf full of several editions would be classically be _ephemerides_. For many GPS people, the _ephemeris_ is the list of parameters for one satellite. For a collection of these for multiple satellites\*, some people use _ephemerises_, others use _ephemerides_, and still others _ephemeris_ (I think as a collective singular). It seems to me that one of the many pronunciations used for _ephemerides_, where it’s as if it ends in the English word “rides”, has caused some to think that an individual parameter is an _ephemeride_ or even an _ephemerid_ (which apparently is really a mayfly). \*not to be confused with the _almanac_, which in GPS lingo is the lower-resolution collection of parameters for all available satellites ---
**Author:** ![Darwins\_Finch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darwins_finch/32/20304_2.png) [@Darwins\_Finch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darwins_Finch)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2004, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/13 "2004-01-13T16:39:58Z")
> [@](#): > > _Mandamus_ means “we order” in Latin, and _ignoramus_ means “we are ignorant.” If _ignoramus_ is Latin for “we are ignorant”, what would be the correct Latin term for “an ignorant person” (or even “you are ignorant”)? ---
**Author:** ![klockwerk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/klockwerk/32/6475_2.png) [@klockwerk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/klockwerk)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2004, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/14 "2004-01-13T17:33:56Z")
Perhaps this column should be renamed _"Latin nouns and plurals 101 by **Cecil Adams"** _ :p. The answer went much farther than the question, but sometimes it’s good to get more than you bargined for. ---
**Author:** ![cnoocy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3d9bf3/32.png) [@cnoocy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cnoocy)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2004, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/15 "2004-01-13T18:39:10Z")
Hey, bibliophage, can you clear up “cactus” while you’re at it? My research implies that “cacti” is actually correct, (neo-latin from Greek kaktos) but I’d quite like to get your opinion. ---
**Author:** ![BJMoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@BJMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BJMoose)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2004, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/16 "2004-01-13T19:28:12Z")
Unless I overlooked something, **bibliophage** didn’t touch on one plural that makes no sense to me at all - clitorides, the plural of clitoris. This is the only plural given in both the Ninth and Tenth editions of _Webster’s Collegiate_. An explanation would be most welcome. ---
**Author:** ![John\_W.Kennedy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_w.kennedy/32/1031_2.png) [@John\_W.Kennedy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_W.Kennedy)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2004, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/17 "2004-01-13T20:25:07Z")
_Clitoris_ is Greek (entering English via Latin). Nothing odd about _clitorides_. _Ignoramus_, meaning “We do not know”, is the old legal term for a grand jury not finding a true bill (_i.e._, not handing down an indictment). It was long thought that _ignoramus_ became a noun in English via using it as an insult to the grand jury that refused to indict the Earl of Shaftesbury in 1681, but it now seems to be a bit older than that, based on an old joke about an incompetent lawyer who thought _ignoramus_ was someone’s name. As to a real Latin word with more or less the sense of _ignoramus_, there’s _ignorans_, which is strictly an adjective, meaning “not knowing”, but Latin generally allows the use of adjective X as a noun mean “X thing” or “X person”, _etc._ Or _ignoror_, which would literally mean “not knower”. But I’d be more inclined to go with one of the more ordinary words for “fool”. ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2004, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/18 "2004-01-13T21:08:12Z")
And here I thought the plural of penis was “Bush Administration” ---
**Author:** ![Moo\_the\_Magic\_Cow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ebca7d/32.png) [@Moo\_the\_Magic\_Cow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moo_the_Magic_Cow)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2004, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/19 "2004-01-13T22:08:03Z")
> [@Tom Arctus](#): > > I do not have Latinate _testes_. I have good old English testicles (“the boys” to my close friends). And while we’re on the subject, of course you all know where that word comes from (_testify_) and why (the ancient Hebrew habit of touching them when swearing an oath ;j ). [http://www.wordorigins.org/wordort.htm#Testify](http://www.wordorigins.org/wordort.htm#Testify) > [@](#): > > Testify, et. al., derives from the Latin testis meaning witness. Testicle also derives from testis. The testes are witnesses to a man’s virility. ---
**Author:** ![bibliophage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bibliophage/32/7615_2.png) [@bibliophage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bibliophage)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2004, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637/20 "2004-01-14T05:34:59Z")
> [@vd](#): > > What is the proper pronunciation of -ides? Does it move the accented syllable? > > The one that I run into is _ephemeris_. **Bibliophage** ’s report would seem to indicate that one of the plurals I hear (_ephemerides_) is probably the correct Latin plural. The correct Latin plural is indeed _ephemerides_. There are no silent vowels in Latin so every vowel (or diphthong) gets its own syllable. _Ephemerides_ then has five syllables (ef-e-MER-i-deez) and _ephemeris_ only four ( e-FEM-er-is). In both cases, the third-to-last syllable (antepenult) gets the primary stress, which is quite common for long Latin words. > [@cnoocy](#): > > **can you clear up “cactus” while you’re at it? My research implies that “cacti” is actually correct, (neo-latin from Greek kaktos) but I’d quite like to get your opinion.** _Cacti_ is the correct Latin plural, as far as I know. _Cactuses_ is also acceptable in English. > [@BJMoose](#): > > **Unless I overlooked something, bibliophage didn’t touch on one plural that makes no sense to me at all - clitorides, the plural of clitoris.** As I mentioned in the report, either _clitorises_ or _clitorides_ is correct in English. _Clitoris_ was borrowed into Latin from Greek, and in both those languages the full root of the word (_clitorid_- in Latin, _kleitorid_- in Greek) is not found in the dictionary-entry form (nominitive singular). _Iris/irides_, _cantharis/cantharides_ (blister beetle), and _ephemeris/ephemerides_ are similar examples. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-plural-of-penis/223637.md?page=2)