# What is the single greatest line in television history? {Please include context & Episode of the Series} **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** tv-shows-scripted\ **Created:** [May 7, 2026, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892 "2026-05-07T16:30:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![N9IWP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/n9iwp/32/3154_2.png) [@N9IWP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/N9IWP)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/164 "2026-05-08T18:54:15Z")
One the best moments of GOT: “A dragon is not a slave” “Unsullied! Slay the masters, slay the soldiers, slay every man who wears a tokar or holds a whip…” Brian ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/165 "2026-05-08T19:17:44Z")
> “May I point out that I had an opportunity to observe your counterparts here quite closely. They were brutal, savage, unprincipled, uncivilized, treacherous - in every way splendid examples of homo sapiens, the very _flower_ of humanity. I found them quite refreshing.” - Spock, _Mirror, Mirror_ > “I do not want to command the Enterprise, but if it should befall me, I suggest you remember that my operatives would avenge my death - and some of _them_… are Vulcans.” - Mirror Spock, _Mirror, Mirror_ ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/166 "2026-05-08T19:29:11Z")
> [@On another topic](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1030246/31): > > My brain just immediately jumped to “Feels like I’m wearing nothin’ at all (nothin’ at all…nothin’ at all)” Stupid sexy Flanders! 😠 ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/167 "2026-05-08T19:31:51Z")
From **In Living Color** : “Homey don’t _play_ that!” [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_QhuBIkPXn0/hqdefault.jpg "Introducing Homey D. Clown") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_QhuBIkPXn0&t=86) ---
**Author:** ![Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/q.q.switcheroo/32/5713_2.png) [@Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.Q.Switcheroo)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/168 "2026-05-08T19:52:17Z")
“I’m seein’ double here! Four Krustys!” _The Simpsons_, ep. “Homie the Clown”: gangster Louie reacts to Krusty the Clown bursting in on the local Mafia chapter as they’re about to execute Homer in a Krusty costume. One of the all-time best “bait and switch” lines. ---
**Author:** ![Gordon\_G](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3da27b/32.png) [@Gordon\_G](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gordon_G)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/169 "2026-05-08T19:59:41Z")
Several fun lines in _The Wire._ I’ll go with this one from Season 1: [spoken by friendly judge agreeing to an unusual search warrant while ADA Pearlman entices him by uncrossing and crossing her legs] "“We’ll let the Court of Appeals figure it out.” ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Knig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@Typo\_Knig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Knig)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/170 "2026-05-08T20:06:20Z")
“But what is grief, if not love persevering?” -Vision, on WandaVision Season 8 Episode 8. Vision is trying to comfort Wanda in her grief over her brother’s death. Full quote: [https://www.imdb.com/title/tt13776714/quotes/?item=qt5598708&ref\_=ext\_shr\_lnk](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt13776714/quotes/?item=qt5598708&ref_=ext_shr_lnk) ---
**Author:** ![smithsb](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smithsb/32/12107_2.png) [@smithsb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smithsb)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/171 "2026-05-08T20:06:28Z")
The Prisoner, circa 1968, was a must see for us college kids. Patrick McGoohan as a retired secret agent kidnapped to find out why he retired. He was identified in the Village as number six. Part of his resistance was, “I am not a number, I am a free man.” This line along with,“Who is number two?” came in handy at the bakery, deli, or meat counter - those with the number tags you would pull. ---
**Author:** ![Sherrerd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sherrerd/32/8_2.png) [@Sherrerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sherrerd)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/172 "2026-05-08T20:10:32Z")
> [@Q.Q.Switcheroo](#): > > “I’m seein’ double here! Four Krustys!” A plot development made possible by the fact that Homer and Krusty (and others, maybe) were drawn with the same basic template. Anyway, I nominate the 1986 classic, season 4 ep 17, from Norm Peterson, who’s entering the bar _Cheers_ and is asked how he is: > [@](#): > > _ **It’s a dog-eat-dog world, and I’m wearing Milk Bone underwear.** _ ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/173 "2026-05-08T20:15:11Z")
That is truly a classic line. ---
**Author:** ![Sherrerd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sherrerd/32/8_2.png) [@Sherrerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sherrerd)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/174 "2026-05-08T20:20:38Z")
Yeah. I agree that “_as God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly_” and “_No one expects the Spanish Inquisition!_” are top contenders, though. Tough to choose between those three. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/175 "2026-05-08T20:21:20Z")
I think the Milk-Bone line has the advantage of needing little in the way of context. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/176 "2026-05-08T20:23:05Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > That is truly a classic line. Norm was full of them. My favorite is: **Woody:** What’s shakin’, Mr Peterson? **Norm:** All four cheeks and a couple of chins. ---
**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/177 "2026-05-08T20:29:49Z")
Norm: “Women. Can’t live _with_ 'em… Pass the Beer-Nuts.” ---
**Author:** ![Sherrerd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sherrerd/32/8_2.png) [@Sherrerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sherrerd)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/178 "2026-05-08T20:29:51Z")
Self-deprecation is a fertile field for humor, and Norm was master of it. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/179 "2026-05-08T20:46:38Z")
> [@terentii](#): > > When helping Ralph prepare for the quiz show, Ed Norton would always warm up by playing “Swanee River” on the piano. Ralph finally told him to knock it off, and when the time came to answer the question, he froze because he knew the tune but couldn’t name its composer. He may have _recognized_ the tune, but I guess he couldn’t name it either: [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/bzxWIL6HElI/hqdefault.jpg "The Honeymooners - Suwanee River") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzxWIL6HElI) ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/180 "2026-05-08T20:51:02Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > “Homey don’t _play_ that!” Who wants to cut the cheese? ---
**Author:** ![Dropo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce7236/32.png) [@Dropo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dropo)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/181 "2026-05-08T20:51:34Z")
Sgt. Joe Friday catches a paroled convict suspected of shooting a police officer and uses an iconic threat to keep him motionless. [Friday](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0916131/?ref_=tt_dyk_qu): [_brandishing a shotgun_] Flinch, and you’ll be chasing your head down Fifth Street! _Dragnet 1967_, S1, E11 - “The Shooting” ---
**Author:** ![F.U.Shakespeare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aca169/32.png) [@F.U.Shakespeare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/F.U.Shakespeare)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/182 "2026-05-08T20:57:07Z")
One of Dragnet’s funniest lines (from The LSD Story episode) albeit not intentionally: _“Marijuana’s the flame, heroin’s the fuse, LSD’s the bomb.”_ ---
**Author:** ![Toxgoddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Toxgoddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Toxgoddess)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2026, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892/183 "2026-05-08T21:12:33Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > Homey don’t _play_ that!" My hubby and I still say this to each other occasionally. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-the-single-greatest-line-in-television-history-please-include-context-episode-of-the-series/1029892.md?page=10)