# What is truly the worst song you have ever heard? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 20, 2005, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160 "2005-10-20T23:13:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/101 "2005-10-21T18:52:35Z")
A snippet of the review, for those too lazy to click on it: > [@](#): > > Many critics, fans, and college students have spent hours debating the serious question of what the worst album in the history of rock actually is. One listen to Attila would provide them with a definitive answer. Attila undoubtedly is the worst album released in the history of rock & roll — hell, the history of recorded music itself. There have been many bad ideas in rock, but none match the colossal stupidity of Attila. There’s a reason why they’re the only heavy rock organ-and-drums duo in the history of rock & roll — it’s an atrocious combination ---
**Author:** ![jackelope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a6a055/32.png) [@jackelope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackelope)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/102 "2005-10-21T19:05:04Z")
> [@Blackclaw](#): > > The White Stripes have some song that starts with something like > > “I’ve been think about my love bell, when you gonna ring it? When you gonna ring it?” It’s “doorbell.” He’s hoping the girl will come see him. I like it, but then I like the White Stripes, so I’m biased. I’d like to point out in general that mere bad lyrics don’t make a song bad; the chief skill required of a pop singer is the ability to sing the most inane, trite, stupid lyrics _as if no one had ever felt this way before_. You can write down the lyrics to pretty much any song and they’ll at least lose their oomph, if not sound completely lame. However… **deevee** is correct. “MacArthur Park” is the worst goddam song ever perpetrated upon the ears of humanity. The [lyrics](http://www.popculturemadness.com/Music/Lyrics/Macarthur.html) go way, WAY beyond “trite” or “inane” into the realms of “inconceivably stupid.” These lyrics are so stupid they’re _cruel_. The music (on the version I’ve heard) sounds like it was written by a committee–of Commodore 64s. I think the entire string section must have gotten carpal tunnel from the overemoting required of them. And the melody… _Dear god, the melody_… The melody is of such hyperdriven, cloying sentimentality as to make Rod McKuen claw out his own eardrums. And Kurt Weill still wouldn’t even bother trying to fix what’s left over. And now, thanks to this thread, I’m going to be singing it all day. ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/103 "2005-10-21T19:35:29Z")
Okay, help me out here. Maybe three or four years ago there was an inexplicable hit with incredibly bad lyrics…I want to say it was “Summer Girls”? There was a line in there about how “Chinese food gives me gas” or something like that. I vote for that song. ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/104 "2005-10-21T19:43:14Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#): > > From the first time I heard it, I hated Whitney Houston’s cover of _I Will Always Love You_. > > A string of repeated flat notes, belted out loudly. How she got so popular absolutely escapes me (ymmv, of course). ## “AndeyeIIIIIIIIIIeeeeeeeYiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii hhhhwhilllll always love youououououuwoowooou…” When “Break my Stride” started playing the other day in Smart & Final, I said to myself, “Thank goodness I’m in the checkout line and almost out the door.” ---
**Author:** ![F.U.Shakespeare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aca169/32.png) [@F.U.Shakespeare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/F.U.Shakespeare)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/105 "2005-10-21T19:46:13Z")
I’ve never cared for Cream’s version of “I’m So Glad” either. The original is much better, if you like scratchy old vinyl recordings. FWIW, the guy who wrote it (Mississippi bluesman Skip James), _hated_ Cream’s version. His wife didn’t even think it was the same song. > [@The Unkempt One](#): > > I’m So Glad, by **Cream** > > I’m so glad > I’m so glad > I’m glad, I’m glad, I’mmmmmmm glad! > > I love Cream, but every time I hear this song I lose a little bit of my soul… ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/106 "2005-10-21T19:59:31Z")
_Mmmmm Mmmmm Mmmmm_ by the Crash Test Dummies is banned by most international treaties and has been deemed too cruel for POWs by the Geneva Convention. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/107 "2005-10-21T20:06:01Z")
> [@F. U. Shakespeare](#): > > FWIW, the guy who wrote it (Mississippi bluesman Skip James), _hated_ Cream’s version. His wife didn’t even think it was the same song. James died before Cream recorded the song. I have heard that his wife didn’t recognize the song, but was plenty glad for the royalty check. ---
**Author:** ![ColonelDax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@ColonelDax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ColonelDax)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/108 "2005-10-21T20:27:20Z")
A vote here for “Paralyzed” by the Legendary Stardust Cowboy, with none other than T-Bone Burnett on drums. Must be heard to be believed. ---
**Author:** ![rowrrbazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rowrrbazzle/32/414_2.png) [@rowrrbazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rowrrbazzle)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/109 "2005-10-21T20:27:51Z")
“Fluffy”, sung by Gloria Balsam. “Heeeeere, Fluffy, where are you, where aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaare you?” ---
**Author:** ![iluvurmom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iluvurmom/32/7276_2.png) [@iluvurmom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iluvurmom)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/110 "2005-10-21T20:27:56Z")
> [@drm](#): > > Without question, _Trapped in the Closet_ by R Kelly. Nothing even comes close to the suck that is this song. And the video was even more nauseating. He makes my skin crawl. Was there ANY hook to that song? :wally ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/111 "2005-10-21T20:45:25Z")
No votes for “Mandy” by Barry Manilow? I am shocked. Muskrat Love is up there, along with Don’t It Make My Brown Eyes Blue, anything by Kicky Dee (or however you spell it). How about “Ebony and Ivory” or “In the Ghetto” bu Elvis, no less? “Coming to America” by Neil Diamond is rank. Most things by Celine Dion–including that motorcycle video and the Titanic song. “Carrion” by someone or other (some kind of rock band, early '90’s). ANY rap–and most hip-hop–what IS that shit? Gah-now have a head full of Seasons of the Sun and Uncle Joe eating cake in the rain or whatever. Need major brain cleansing! ---
**Author:** ![nvad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/51bf81/32.png) [@nvad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nvad)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/112 "2005-10-21T20:51:39Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > “Coming to America” by Neil Diamond is rank. Ugh…the Neil Diamond reference just dragged “Heartlight” out of that cold, dark part of my mind that I hate to visit. Bleccchhhhhh. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/113 "2005-10-21T20:54:20Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > No votes for “Mandy” by Barry Manilow? > > I am shocked. But, but… she came and she gave without taking! I like to kareoke that when totally shit faced drunk. Just make up lyrics, have the audience sing along, and break into “AndeyeIIIIIIIIIIeeeeeeeYiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii hhhhwhilllll always love youououououuwoowooou…” \* sometime near the end when people are starting to get sick of your drunk ass. Ah yes, I loves me those county fairs… - as demonstrated so well by **Viva Los Twages** 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/114 "2005-10-21T20:56:22Z")
Never Surrender - Cory Hart I want to Know What Love is - Foreigner Jack and Diane - John Cougar (before he was Mellencamp) Old Time Rock and Roll - Bob Seger Emotional Rescue - Stones To name a few… ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/115 "2005-10-21T20:56:29Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#): > > But, but… she came and she gave without taking! Yeah, but he sent her away (for obvious reasons). ---
**Author:** ![Kizarvexius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/da6949/32.png) [@Kizarvexius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kizarvexius)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/116 "2005-10-21T21:00:21Z")
Anything sung by Neil Diamond. Anything. Personally, I think he’s a pretty good songwriter. But I’d rather be disembowled with a weedeater than listen to him sing. That really annoying _Can’t Take My Eyes Off Of You_ song. Ye gods, I hate that one. ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/117 "2005-10-21T21:05:43Z")
At least half a dozen of the songs mentioned so far are on my i-tunes playlist. I squandered good moral capital stealing them off Napster, too. No, I won’t say which ones. Nobody’s mentioned “In the Year 2525”? Unbelievable. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/118 "2005-10-21T21:08:45Z")
> [@kunilou](#): > > **KCSuze** has a _real_ competitor with the Shaggs. Yeah, but the Shaggs induce a kind of eye-watering awe with the sheer greatness of their badness. I actually listen to the Shaggs from time to time. It’s like eating a really hot meal (a really REALLY hot meal), or watching a gory Italian horror movie; it’s some cleansing, cathartic, in the way it takes you out of real life into, almost, a different plane of existence, or something. The way leftist politics, taken to its extreme, become rightist extremism, the Shaggs achieved a unique greatness whose like we shall never see again. If we’re lucky. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/119 "2005-10-21T21:11:01Z")
Must perview. > [@lissener](#): > > . . . it’s some_ **how** _ cleansing . . . ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2005, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/120 "2005-10-21T21:11:45Z")
> [@jsc1953](#): > > Nobody’s mentioned “In the Year 2525”? Unbelievable. We were TRYING to suppress that memory. Thanks a lot. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160.md?page=7)