# What is truly the worst song you have ever heard? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 20, 2005, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160 "2005-10-20T23:13:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/141 "2005-10-22T01:43:14Z")
Everyne is entitled to their opinion on this subject, but anyone whose poinion is different from mine is wrong. The worst song ever is “In The Year 2525,” by Zager & Evans. Kudos to those who mentioned it. You won’t find a worse song anywhere, ever. There’s no combination of sounds detectable to human ears that could be worse than that song. The sound of a school bus full of crippled children being T-boned by a gasoline truck, exploding and burning with corpses flung all about and being run over by other cars that hurtle off the road and explode themselves while the occupants scream in terror would still be a more pleasant sound than “In The Year 2525.” ---
**Author:** ![Kilvert\_s\_Pagan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c37758/32.png) [@Kilvert\_s\_Pagan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kilvert_s_Pagan)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/142 "2005-10-22T01:45:45Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > **Kilvert** is not paying attention-I mentioned E and I a ways back. Thanks for bringing it up, again. 🙂 :smack: My attention span just doesn’t make three pages anymore. My apologies. And thanks for the group and song name, **Marque Elf**. ---
**Author:** ![mamboman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecb155/32.png) [@mamboman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mamboman)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/143 "2005-10-22T02:05:41Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > Everyne is entitled to their opinion on this subject, but anyone whose poinion is different from mine is wrong. > > The worst song ever is “In The Year 2525,” by Zager & Evans. Kudos to those who mentioned it. ." Whoa Whoa Whoa Whoa Whoa there sailor! Have you heard Z&E’s follow up - “Mr Turnkey”?. Cheery little ditty about a man who rapes a woman in a Wichita bar and kills himself in prison, IIRC. Definitley a comedown from even “2525”… mm ---
**Author:** ![Good\_Egg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/96bed5/32.png) [@Good\_Egg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Good_Egg)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/144 "2005-10-22T02:35:15Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > “Carrion” by someone or other (some kind of rock band, early '90’s). ``` I belive it was Carry On My Wayward Son by whom I know not, but your title has more "meaning." hee I love this thread. Ah, the memories. A great book called Hollywood Hi Fi mentions lots of 'artists" and their "songs", such as Fabio, etc. Also the Shatner phenomenon. By the way, I've heard Golden throats and thought the singing was Not that bad at all. Round & Round by Ratt comes to mind. Also Play That Funky Music White Boy, Delilah by Tom Jones, Livin La Vida Loca (really!) ``` By the way, **Mandy** is a Wonderful song! How dare you malign it!!! ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/145 "2005-10-22T02:38:57Z")
> [@Good Egg](#): > > I belive it was Carry On My Wayward Son by whom I know not, but your title has more “meaning.” hee That was Kansas. It went to #11 in 1976. ---
**Author:** ![mamboman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecb155/32.png) [@mamboman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mamboman)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/146 "2005-10-22T02:59:28Z")
Not so much a song, but the truly worst music I have ever heard was an Ornette Coleman album called “Science Fiction”. Imagine the sound of a large water fowl being sodomised by an eggbeater. I’m also told that this album is a realtivley middle-of-the-road effort for Coleman. Lord have mercy! mm ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/147 "2005-10-22T03:06:17Z")
> [@mamboman](#): > > Imagine the sound of a large water fowl being sodomised by an eggbeater. I don’t have to imagine… ---
**Author:** ![Good\_Egg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/96bed5/32.png) [@Good\_Egg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Good_Egg)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/148 "2005-10-22T03:15:08Z")
How soon we all have forgotten the great Yoko Ono. :o ---
**Author:** ![Suburban\_Plankton](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suburban_plankton/32/219_2.png) [@Suburban\_Plankton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Suburban_Plankton)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/149 "2005-10-22T04:41:06Z")
I happen to rather enjoy quite a few of the songs mentioned in this thread (i’m not telling which ones). However, there are a couple clunkers which have thus far escaped mention. I give you: [Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds](http://www.pathcom.com/~boby/lsd.au) , by William Shatner, and [The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins](http://www.alteringtime.com/features/misc/?p=baggins) (with video that must be seen to be believed), by Leonard Nimoy. Too bad that Star Trek thing didn’t work out for them. But the all-time worst piece of “music” ever recorded is still “We Built This City”. Words cannot describe how putrid this song is. (As for “We Built This Starbucks”: I started to play it a few minutes ago, _very_ softly so as not to annoy **Rhiannon8404**. She heard the first four notes and made me turn it off. She’s _good_.) ---
**Author:** ![Cherry2000](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cherry2000](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cherry2000)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/150 "2005-10-22T04:52:40Z")
Some Crap=tastic drek that has not been mentioned yet: \*Horse with no Name \* (oooookay…just name the fuckin’ horse and be done with it) _Run, Joey, Run_ (never mind… how 'bout _I_ run when you play that song?) _Wildfire_…and _Shannon_… and… (and any other dead animal song) Yeah, we definitely need a “barf” smiley around here… ---
**Author:** ![Good\_Egg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/96bed5/32.png) [@Good\_Egg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Good_Egg)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/151 "2005-10-22T04:54:17Z")
Midnight at the Oasis ---
**Author:** ![Mehitabel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Mehitabel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mehitabel)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/152 "2005-10-22T05:10:38Z")
_You Light Up My Life_. This is a cute harmless little song that you play and play and play when you’re 13 until one day, out of nowhere, comes the time that _it gets played ONE TIME TOO MANY._ You immediately develop powerful aural antibodies to it, and your body contends with it from there on in with violent projectile vomiting. Another vote too for the Glue Factory Duet-_Horse with no name_ and _Wildfire._ And oh yeah, that one that goes “Someone’s knocking at the door, somebody’s ringing the bell (repeat ten times over). Do me a favor, open the door, let 'er iiiiiin!” A merciful Lord has wiped the “artist” and title from my memory banks. ---
**Author:** ![Good\_Egg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/96bed5/32.png) [@Good\_Egg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Good_Egg)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/153 "2005-10-22T05:14:15Z")
Wouldn’t that be Paul Mccartney? These keep coming to my mind…My baby Takes the Morning Train by Sheena Easton, War Sells But Who’s Buying, Gene Genie by Bowie? ---
**Author:** ![La\_Llorona](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@La\_Llorona](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/La_Llorona)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/154 "2005-10-22T05:55:25Z")
Another vote for “Ebony and Ivory.” You think, “A song about racial tolerance, sung by the great Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney, no less! How bad can it be?” Answer: suicide-inducingly bad, that’s how! And although I can’t say in all honesty that this is the _worst_ song I’ve ever heard, for sheer inanity [“Cater 2 U”](http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Cater-2-U-lyrics-Destiny's-Child/6F6AD0D36D5F7DE948256F35000B2182) by Destiny’s Child genuinely can’t be beat. But the absolute worst song I have ever heard is a little gem called “Who’s in the House” by a gentleman known as Carman. I certainly do not condone illegal downloading, but I _would_ encourage you to spend a buck or whatever and legally acquire the thing just to marvel at the sheer mind-boggling awfulness of it. The answer to the question of the title? J.C. Why, yes, that’s J.C., as in Jesus Christ. The lyrics themselves are pretty unremarkable: they’re pretty standard Christian music fare. But what puts this song over the edge into terrifyingly bad music is that the words are set over a droning club beat and contain the immortal line, “Dance! We’re kickin’ it for Christ!” Has to be heard to be believed, honestly. ---
**Author:** ![La\_Llorona](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@La\_Llorona](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/La_Llorona)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/155 "2005-10-22T05:57:57Z")
Oh, and I almost forgot: “(I Got That) Boom Boom” by Britney Spears feat. the Ying Yang Twins. And yes, it really is just as bad as you can infer from the title. ---
**Author:** ![Good\_Egg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/96bed5/32.png) [@Good\_Egg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Good_Egg)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/156 "2005-10-22T06:00:08Z")
“Who’s in the house? JC!” I have heard that song! At a friend of mine’s years ago. I had forgotten all about it til now. small world ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/157 "2005-10-22T06:11:14Z")
> [@stanger](#): > > “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” > > I … I can’t go on … the retching reflex is to great … Actually, if you pay attention to the lyrics, the song is meant to be ironic. Life sucks, basically, and everyone around you is telling you just to be happy. It’s sarcastic. “Sex Bomb”, Tom Jones. Ugh, what is the appeal of this man? He’s fugly and he looks like he smells of cheap cologne and desparation. Faith Hill’s remake of “Piece of My Heart”. She should be shot for that. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/158 "2005-10-22T06:31:24Z")
I have a couple of very viable candidates. The first is one that Dave Barry mentioned in his “Bad Song Survey” years ago; he said something to the effect of, “It’s a shame that some songs aren’t more widely known and didn’t get the votes they deserve…it is quite possibly the worst song I’ve ever heard.” That song was **Hooty Sapperticker** by Barbara and the Boys. I have a copy, and it is truly appalling. Imagine if you will: most of the song consists of “the boys” saying “hooty hooty hooty!” over and over, followed by Barbara saying, “Howdy Hooty Sapperticker!” Seriously, if you can match that, I am in awe. And yet, there is another horrible song that comes close. If you dare, download and listen to [**I’m Gonna Spend My Christmas With A Dalek**](http://www.stomptokyo.com/extras/DalekXmas.mp3) by the Go Gos (no, not _those_ Go Gos, some other low-rent band from the 1960s.) Ridiculous and awful in ways that only a song from the sixties can be. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerous\_Nan\_McGrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecd19e/32.png) [@Dangerous\_Nan\_McGrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerous_Nan_McGrew)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/159 "2005-10-22T07:57:33Z")
> [@Kyla](#): > > Okay, help me out here. Maybe three or four years ago there was an inexplicable hit with incredibly bad lyrics…I want to say it was “Summer Girls”? There was a line in there about how “Chinese food gives me gas” or something like that. > > I vote for that song. I gotta come in here and back **Kyla** up on this one. That’s the song that came to my mind when I saw the thread title. It is indeed called “Summer Girls” and is by LFO. [Lyrics.](http://lyrical.nl/song/39550) You people will long for rainy cake after the likes of this: > [@](#): > > You’re the best girl that I ever did see > The great Larry Bird jersey 33 > When you take a sip you buzzlike a hornet > Billy Shakespere wrote a whole bunch of sonnets Budding songwriters, remember: it doesn’t matter if your lyrics make sense, it only matters that they _rhyme_. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2005, 11:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160/160 "2005-10-22T11:07:27Z")
OK-my Carrion isn’t the Kansas tune (no doubt wretched anyway). It goes like this: “Carrion, on the road the that I must travel,” Carrion, —can’t remember the rest– Lots of guitar–sounds kinda Survivor-ish (in terms of music). That is the only lyric that I can call to mind. Definetly from the '90’s–early on. Husband says that it’s “Carry Anne”. I like my version better. Why is Carry Anne laying down in the road that the guy must travel? None of it makes any sense–so it must be deep and significant, somehow… 😛 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-truly-the-worst-song-you-have-ever-heard/327160.md?page=9)