# What is your absolutely brilliant idea/invention? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 24, 2018, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755 "2018-05-24T20:50:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 11:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/21 "2018-05-25T11:34:12Z")
> [@elbows](#): > > A back pack vacuum cleaner that looks very space age, cordless, has a power telescoping wand, (for ceiling cobwebs!), great suction, and makes a very cool sound as sucks things in. Plus a high setting with a throaty power sound. > > If you could get men to _want_ to clean house, you’ll be a millionaire many times over! Doesn’t Dyson already make one? Only it’s more compact than a backpack model. The motor and all the electronics fit in the handle. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 11:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/22 "2018-05-25T11:38:46Z")
They should have emergency exit door simulators set up at airports so that during layovers you could practice. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/23 "2018-05-25T11:41:32Z")
> [@madmonk28](#): > > They should have emergency exit door simulators set up at airports so that during layovers you could practice. They should also have demonstrations/drills at school to show children how to operate the emergency doors and windows on the bus. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/24 "2018-05-25T11:53:02Z")
This is probably obsolete now with high-speed internet practically everywhere, but years ago I imagined a modern replacement for exchangeable floppy disks: there are some USB flash drives that do not have the metal casing around the connector and are very flat–I imagined a credit-card sized (but thicker) piece of plastic that contained several of those USB drives connected by sprues (much like how SIM cards are packaged) that were high enough capacity to hold something meaningful but low enough capacity to be cheap. If you need to give a file to someone, you would pull a card out of your wallet, snap off a USB drive, copy over the files, and give them the drive as casually as you once did with floppy discs. (It would look a little like [this](https://www.amazon.ca/Liili-Memory-13285135-Japanese-cuisine/dp/B01LG9F6OS) drive that I just googled up, except with several drives that break away instead of hinge out.) ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/25 "2018-05-25T12:11:48Z")
> [@cochrane](#): > > Doesn’t Dyson already make one? Only it’s more compact than a backpack model. The motor and all the electronics fit in the handle. No, No, No ! Back pack/wearable? No! Looks space age techy? No! Power telescoping wand? No! Makes great sound as it sucks things up? No! Has a high setting with a throaty power sound! No! Not even close. Imagine something out of Ghostbusters, only a vacuum. Push a button, nozzle extends a few feet to reach whatever. You don’t push it along the floor! You just point it! At anything! And when it’s on high it’s sounds all vroom, vroom and makes a very manly noise! If it was shiny metal and you could get maybe a Star Wars tie in, you’d be richer than Kanye in no time! ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/26 "2018-05-25T12:23:17Z")
I’d like to start a business to clean sunglasses/regular glasses. I would set things up with an agreement between my company and various bars/bookstores/restaurants/etc who would allow my workers to enter several times a day, offering glass cleaning, screw tightening, minor repairs and adjustments, etc. My glass techs would have a traveling tool kit. A quick lens cleaning would be $1.25, with most people giving the tech either a .75 or 1.75 tip. I’d drive my van around town, dropping off and picking up glass techs. I’d happily pay someone to clean my sunglasses while I’m sipping my beer, but everyone I’ve mentioned this to thinks I’m nuts. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/27 "2018-05-25T13:49:48Z")
I actually do hold four patents, but none of them are sexy. I’ve invented some optical retroreflectors that I haven’t seen elsewhere, which I’m thinking of writing an article about, or maybe patenting. But they don’t have any obvious advantage over existing retroreflectors, so I don’t think anyone would be interested in them. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/28 "2018-05-25T14:09:55Z")
When I go into the bathroom in the morning to take a shower, it takes a while for my eyes to adjust to having the lights on. So what I want is combination dimmer/timer. Press a button and the bathroom lights go from 0% to 100% brightness over perhaps two or three minutes, so I don’t have to walk around with my eyes shut (which is what I do now). ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/29 "2018-05-25T14:22:54Z")
I had a dimmer switch installed in the en suite bathroom, when we moved in, for this exact reason. I don’t need that kind of shock in the middle of the night! I want to go right back to sleep. It doesn’t have a timer, but I leave it set so when I flip the switch, in the night, it’s a lovely, very dim light. They’re cheap and easy to install, I have them for the porch and dining room too. I like being able to change the lighting to suit my mood. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/30 "2018-05-25T14:51:30Z")
> [@elbows](#): > > No, No, No ! > > Back pack/wearable? No! > > Looks space age techy? No! > > Power telescoping wand? No! > > Makes great sound as it sucks things up? No! > > Has a high setting with a throaty power sound! No! > > Not even close. Imagine something out of Ghostbusters, only a vacuum. Push a button, nozzle extends a few feet to reach whatever. You don’t push it along the floor! You just point it! At anything! And when it’s on high it’s sounds all vroom, vroom and makes a very manly noise! > > If it was shiny metal and you could get maybe a Star Wars tie in, you’d be richer than Kanye in no time! Why would you want something heavy you have to wear on your back? I’d rather have a vacuum that you can hold in your hand and weighs less than five pounds. And you can take off the motorized head and put on a wand to reach over your head. It may not power extend, but so what? And it looks space agey enough. And who needs a noisy vacuum as long as it has good suction? I’m a guy, and I’d use one. [http://banksvac.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/1800x/e92d982777f52473bac4e540538646b0/v/6/v6\_motorhead\_versatility\_sq.jpg](http://banksvac.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/1800x/e92d982777f52473bac4e540538646b0/v/6/v6_motorhead_versatility_sq.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/31 "2018-05-25T15:16:18Z")
I admit seeing something similar to this on twitter: A dating app that matches people based on your search history. At least you know you shared the same kinks.🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/32 "2018-05-25T15:41:45Z")
> [@elbows](#): > > A back pack vacuum cleaner that looks very space age, cordless, has a power telescoping wand, (for ceiling cobwebs!), great suction, and makes a very cool sound as sucks things in. Plus a high setting with a throaty power sound. > > If you could get men to _want_ to clean house, you’ll be a millionaire many times over! Does that thing have a Hemi? ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/33 "2018-05-25T17:12:00Z")
A fast-response LCD dimmer system built into the windshield and front side windows that mitigates the strobe effect one experiences while driving a forested highway on a sunny day. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/34 "2018-05-25T19:02:45Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > A fast-response LCD dimmer system built into the windshield and front side windows that mitigates the strobe effect one experiences while driving a forested highway on a sunny day. I could have used that on my TV screen when I watched J. J. Abrams’ _Star Trek_. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/35 "2018-05-25T19:16:41Z")
The “Bleep Buster”. It would work through the same kind of encoding the closed captioning feature on your television does. It would removing those bleeps they use to censor out bad words on TV and let you hear what they actually said. Nothing that could come out of their mouth could be more offensive than those irritating _bleeps_!:mad: Toilet paper that was dispensed in a box just like Kleenex. It would be larger and easier to use than the stuff on a roll, but made from the same material as TP so it would be safe for septic and sewer systems. A blow dry unit for the bathroom that emitted hot/warm circulating air like at the car wash. After a shower you could dry your body and hair in about 10 seconds or less. And it would save on laundry. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/36 "2018-05-25T19:30:08Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > A blow dry unit for the bathroom that emitted hot/warm circulating air like at the car wash. After a shower you could dry your body and hair in about 10 seconds or less. And it would save on laundry. Simple and practical, surely it exists. ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/37 "2018-05-25T19:35:23Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Simple and practical, surely it exists. I’ve been in locker rooms that had the World hand dryers higher up on the wall so one could stand under it to dry your hair. They just would need to make one with a bigger vent and more powerful blower for the entire body. ETA: Well, whatta you know? There is [one!](https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https%3A%2F%2Fimages-na.ssl-images-amazon.com%2Fimages%2FI%2F41V52yDxE0L.jpg&imgrefurl=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.co.uk%2FValiryo%25C2%25AE-Body-Dryer-White-Matte%2Fdp%2FB01301G0A4&docid=lDsa8IEy337RhM&tbnid=CWrClkXbW6bUgM%3A&vet=10ahUKEwjttur_zaHbAhXruFkKHWPNC5oQMwizASgBMAE..i&w=303&h=500&bih=631&biw=1024&q=body%20dryer&ved=0ahUKEwjttur_zaHbAhXruFkKHWPNC5oQMwizASgBMAE&iact=mrc&uact=8) ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/38 "2018-05-25T19:42:40Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > The “Bleep Buster”. It would work through the same kind of encoding the closed captioning feature on your television does. It would removing those bleeps they use to censor out bad words on TV and let you hear what they actually said. Nothing that could come out of their mouth could be more offensive than those irritating _bleeps_!:mad: I saw a Jerry Springer interview where he literally admitted that the show added extra bleeps to make the content appear to be more salacious than it actually was. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/39 "2018-05-25T19:45:37Z")
Ducted vents in the toilet seat (one intake, one exhaust) so that the stench goes directly outside from the bowl instead of being dragged all the way through the room by the ceiling fan. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2018, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755/40 "2018-05-25T20:39:39Z")
Pre-measured peanut butter sticks, like sticks of butter, for baking. In the early days of DVD, I had a business idea: a service that would let you look through a catalog of music videos, burn the ones you wanted onto a DVD, and ship it to your home. YouTube put the kibosh on that notion. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-is-your-absolutely-brilliant-idea-invention/814755.md?page=3)