# What job could you not do/where could you never work? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 16, 2009, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622 "2009-03-16T15:06:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![SnakesCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4af34b/32.png) [@SnakesCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SnakesCatLady)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/21 "2009-03-17T01:06:53Z")
Referee for any kind of sports - I could just not take the abuse these people get. ---
**Author:** ![MandaJo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/22 "2009-03-17T01:22:48Z")
I couldn’t work in a car title loan place, or pay-day advance, or rent-to-own. Those sorts of places totally have the right to exist, but I’d feel too dirty to stand it. ---
**Author:** ![Unsquare\_Dance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/b3f665/32.png) [@Unsquare\_Dance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unsquare_Dance)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/23 "2009-03-17T01:53:30Z")
> [@cromulent](#): > > I was fired from a telemarketing job after two weeks. And it was for a charity, one that I was proud to be representing (though I was admittedly not proud to be calling people up at the dinner hour). > > A typical phone call would go something like this: > > Me: Hi, this is Ms. Cromulent, calling from (Charity name here), would you like to make a donation to — > > TelemarketingVictim: No, not really. > > Me: Ok, thanks for your time, bye! > > I’m surprised I lasted two weeks. I was just too polite to be a telemarketer. And yeah, I’m a born-and-bred New Yorker, so go figure. I did that for my university for about eight months, until I graduated. Me and 23 other college students in a room until 9 pm, irritating the fuck out of people who had no interest in giving their money away. By the end of it, you’re pretty thick-skinned, and you’re talking the newbies through their first scream-n-hangup. “Aw, a guy told me to go fuck myself on my first night, too.” Easily one of the most fun jobs I’ve ever had, as far as workplace camaraderie. But you’re right, some people just aren’t cut out for it. A friend of mine ended up quitting because she just couldn’t handle people yelling at her. I wouldn’t want to be a high school teacher, but it’s looking more and more like I’ll be one. ---
**Author:** ![aaslatten](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f14d63/32.png) [@aaslatten](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aaslatten)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/24 "2009-03-17T02:15:19Z")
Prison guard. I think I’d rather be homeless. (I was going to say work at Wal-Mart, because of my now-rather-cliche feelings for that company, but I could probably do that if I had to. For a while.) ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/25 "2009-03-17T03:35:08Z")
•If experience teaches me anything, apparently anything dealing with large amounts of people. I think I could handle “executioner” better than “retail” again. ::shudder:: •Filth cleaning. A hazmat suit might help, but it wouldn’t be that ideal to begin with. ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/26 "2009-03-17T04:58:36Z")
> [@Lobsang](#): > > Security guard. I can imagine myself going quite insane having to stroll about in an empty building or yard for eight hours. There are many other options in security that are not so mundane. I worked security in an amusement park…rarely a dull moment. For me… property management/landlord. I just lack the needed level of prick to toss people out into the cold when life gets hard. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/27 "2009-03-17T06:07:14Z")
Well, I’ve already had the worst job in the world: Selling women’s shoes in a department store during summer break when I was in college. Other than that, I could never be a coroner. ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/28 "2009-03-17T06:40:19Z")
Digging out bodies after a natural disaster or bombing. Not to be morbid, but yesterday I watched a History Channel program on “The Black Death”, and oh, Jesus! Please, y’all: **No** Monty Python, okay? ☹ Quasi ---
**Author:** ![omaximizer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8dc957/32.png) [@omaximizer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/omaximizer)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/29 "2009-03-17T07:42:02Z")
About two thirds of the jobs Mike Rowe does on Dirty Jobs. I have a much more profound respect for those who can. ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 12:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/30 "2009-03-17T12:42:46Z")
I would never take a job where I have to use a phone an a regular basis. I can’t translate spoken language into text in an efficient manner. Somebody can give me their name that I know how to spell and I have to concentrate on writing the name while they continue to talk and I miss all of it. Somebody whose name I don’t know will have to repeat the spelling of each part of their name about 5 times for me to write it down because they never say it slowly when you first ask them to repeat it. Repeat the procedure for all the information needed. Now a days it would be even worse, because when I do one thing requiring my concentration I lose track of what I was doing. ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/31 "2009-03-17T12:52:46Z")
Any job where I couldn’t go to the bathroom basically whenever I want to–eg, toll booth worker, crane operator, or pilot. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 12:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/32 "2009-03-17T12:57:26Z")
My mother-in-law will soon be starting a new job in the billing department of a hospital. I think I’d probably be too soft-hearted to insist that people who are down on their luck pay their bill now. I also can’t read nonverbal cues from things like tone of voice, so I’m sure I’d fall for a lot of people who were lying. > [@scifisam2009](#): > > Well, there are lots of jobs I _could_ never do - vet, pilot, for a start. Same here. I couldn’t do sales, for the same reason Paris Hilton couldn’t be a research physicist. I couldn’t do precise manual labor, because I am a klutz. ---
**Author:** ![SciFiSam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/47e85d/32.png) [@SciFiSam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SciFiSam)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/33 "2009-03-18T01:21:47Z")
Just to clarify, this is what I meant by bailiff: [(wiki)](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bailiff#United_States) > [@](#): > > Certificated bailiffs are employed by private companies and enforce a variety of debts on behalf of organisations such as local authorities. They can seize and sell goods to cover the amount of the debt owed. They also hold a certificate, which enables them, and them alone, to levy distress for rent, road traffic debts, council tax and non-domestic rates. They cannot enforce the collection of money due under High Court or county court orders. > > Non-certificated bailiffs are employed by private companies and are entitled to recover the money owed for a variety of debts by seizing and selling your goods but cannot levy distress for rent, road traffic debts, council tax or non-domestic rates, or enforce the collection of money due under High Court or county court orders. Debt collectors, basically. That dry description doesn’t set out just what bastards they can be, acting in barely legal (and often plainly illegal) ways to try to collect debts that are either still in dispute, were already settled, belong to someone else, or have some other justifiable reason for not being collected. I know that people do need to pay their debts, but the bailiffs’ letters and phone calls I’ve had (including lots to a former tenant of my flat) show them to be utter cuntbuckets. No, putting a notice on a random car outside my flat will not induce me to pay a bill I don’t owe! Neither will letters in big red writing stating that you’ll be bringing the police when you visit, since you can’t do that! However, I’ve recently seen ‘bailiff’ used on here by a US doper to refer to someone working at a court, like this: > [@](#): > > Many in the United States use the word bailiff colloquially to refer to a peace officer providing court security. More often, these court officers are sheriff’s deputies, marshals, or constables. The terminology varies among (and sometimes within) the several states. That’s not what I meant. Apologies for the rant, but that’s the feeling that bailiffs inspire in most people I know. ---
**Author:** ![EpicNonsense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c37758/32.png) [@EpicNonsense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EpicNonsense)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/34 "2009-03-18T01:47:09Z")
I will never again work a bullshit job that requires no brains (did it once for 2 weeks). Basically, positions whereas you are a robot in a sense and you do the same exact thing all day, every day. I need change, versatility, the ability to be creative, and options in what I’m working on. Carpentry is my favorite gig so far… I will never work in a position that requires me to handle foods, whether cooked or still in a bag, such as a grocery store or a restaurant… I wouldn’t mind serving beverages though. ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/35 "2009-03-18T09:32:46Z")
Anything that requires being dishonest- or not completely honest. ---
**Author:** ![ExTank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@ExTank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExTank)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/36 "2009-03-18T16:36:13Z")
Any job that’s dully repetitive. Assembly line work, for example. As a Field Service Tech, outside of unscheduled service calls, I get to pretty much make my own schedule. I love it. There’s always a different place to go to, a different technical challenge to puzzle out. There’s upgrades and installs, programming, electrical and electronics work. Never a dull moment. ---
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/37 "2009-03-18T16:43:00Z")
Slaughterhouse. ---
**Author:** ![Sundrop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/da6949/32.png) [@Sundrop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sundrop)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/38 "2009-03-18T17:43:15Z")
I could never work at the IRS. Unless I were put in charge in which case I would use my mad MBA leadership/org skills to send the place into a flaming tailspin from which it could never recover. Or being muscle for the mob collecting ‘protection’ money, but I repeat myself. ---
**Author:** ![FallenAngel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@FallenAngel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FallenAngel)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2009, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/39 "2009-03-19T16:55:36Z")
I could never work for the government in any capacity, at any level. I couldn’t work as a vet or vet tech. I have a lot of trauma experience and training working on people, and it doesn’t bother me in the least, but seriously ill and injured pets crush my heart every single time. I could never work in any corrections or treatment job that dealt with child molesters. I’d have too hard a time containing my raging hatred. I could never work as a criminal attorney on either side of the aisle, although for different reasons than my standard government work aversion. ---
**Author:** ![anu-la1979](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/47e85d/32.png) [@anu-la1979](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anu-la1979)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2009, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622/40 "2009-03-19T17:03:16Z")
Leaving aside the obvious jobs-I could never ever ever be a doctor or do anything else in healthcare (human or veterinary). First because I’m mildly hypochondriachal about my health, second because I cannot deal with blood and bodily effluvia (can’t!) and finally because hospitals give me the heebie jeebies. My younger sister is a psychiatrist, which seems pretty cool, but I could not deal with going through medical school and facing all of the above. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-job-could-you-not-do-where-could-you-never-work/489622.md?page=3)