# What land will you choose to be viceroy of after the conquest? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 5, 2008, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-land-will-you-choose-to-be-viceroy-of-after-the-conquest/462208 "2008-09-05T17:04:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2008, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-land-will-you-choose-to-be-viceroy-of-after-the-conquest/462208/141 "2008-09-16T00:11:26Z")
> [@Scylla](#): > > Yeah, yeah, yeah, been there done that. Trust me on the Secret Police thing. **You** may not care what happens, but this doesn’t mean that they’re not all gonna still and come and ask you questions and favors, and complain about things. You know, if you take the first 76 people who ask favors & questions and feed them to the alligators, everybody else leaves you alone. That’s what alligators are for. ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2008, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-land-will-you-choose-to-be-viceroy-of-after-the-conquest/462208/142 "2008-09-16T00:21:26Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > You know, if you take the first 76 people who ask favors & questions and feed them to the alligators, everybody else leaves you alone. That’s what alligators are for. Duuhhhh. And who’s going to fee them to the alligators? You? It gets old quick. After the alligators get full, who’s gonna change them out for hungry ones? You? Who’s gonna clean up the alligator pond? You? That’s why you need Secret Police. They take care of all that for you. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2008, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-land-will-you-choose-to-be-viceroy-of-after-the-conquest/462208/143 "2008-09-16T00:28:33Z")
> [@Scylla](#): > > Duuhhhh. > > And who’s going to fee them to the alligators? Obviously the robots programmed to on a killing spree in the populace (a) if I ever die of unnantural causes or (b) if I die of natural causes (to keep the hero types busy while the sun-killer arms, or (c) when I say so. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2008, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-land-will-you-choose-to-be-viceroy-of-after-the-conquest/462208/144 "2008-09-16T00:35:36Z")
> [@Scylla](#): > > And who’s going to fee them to the alligators? You? It gets old quick. After the alligators get full, who’s gonna change them out for hungry ones? You? Who’s gonna clean up the alligator pond? You? I submit that His Unutterableness intends that the remaining guys at the 'gator fest, the ones who _didn’t_ get fed to them will take care of the reptiles. Remember Voltaire, _to encourage the others._ That, of course, is Plan B. And I’m coming up with my own Plan B right now…Otto, start the hovercraft. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2008, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-land-will-you-choose-to-be-viceroy-of-after-the-conquest/462208/145 "2008-09-16T00:49:07Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > I submit that His Unutterableness intends that the remaining guys at the 'gator fest, the ones who _didn’t_ get fed to them will take care of the reptiles. Remember Voltaire, _to encourage the others._ > > That, of course, is Plan B. > And I’m coming up with my own Plan B right now…Otto, start the hovercraft. He’s been banned, silly flytrap. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2008, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-land-will-you-choose-to-be-viceroy-of-after-the-conquest/462208/146 "2008-09-16T02:01:19Z")
Voltaire also said, “Never anticipate your Boss.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-land-will-you-choose-to-be-viceroy-of-after-the-conquest/462208.md?page=7)