# What makes a girl "dirty" - in a good way? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 2, 2010, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399 "2010-01-02T14:40:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![kingbighair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/13edae/32.png) [@kingbighair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kingbighair)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2010, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399/61 "2010-01-04T17:10:03Z")
“Dirty” has a negative connotation when used in any way. It can be used interchangeably with slut, tramp, loose, etc. I don’t agree with calling women these things, but I am not society. I think the proper term for a taboo-breaking woman in a positive light is “a freak”. Women, by and large, are passive when it comes to sex. I surmise it has everything to do with society repressing female sexuality. So sex becomes: man - “let’s do this sex act” woman - (hesitates)… I don’t know man - “come on” woman - (begrudgingly accepts) A woman is a freak (or dirty in a good way) when sex is this: woman - “let’s do this sex act” man - (gasps)… “I love you” The definition does not turn on a specific sex act, although certain taboo sex acts can aid in freakiness. It has everything to do with the woman being the instigator and having no hangups about how she will be perceived. Instigation is not essential to being a freak, but a woman is a freak if she is the one getting things going. A second use for dirty in a good way applies to women who fit the “girl next door” image of society and then end up enjoying sex. The classic hair style, non-revealing clothing, non-sexual speech, church-going types. Their appearance suggests they are conservative in nature and vanilla in bed. This expectation becomes an anchor of sorts in the minds of men, so any deviation from it makes them “dirty”. My guess is it is Oedipal in nature. It is also a conquest fantasy of sorts for men to see a girl next door type go crazy in bed. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2010, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399/62 "2010-01-04T17:19:10Z")
Dirty = showing ankles Whore = showing shoulders ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2010, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399/63 "2010-01-05T00:25:12Z")
Personally, the _“dirty in a good way”_ type of ladies that I most appreciate are those who have the appearance and demeanor of your typical “skanky ho”, but who are, in fact, pretentious, high maintenance and profoundly frigid—but, I think I speak for most men in this regard. ---
**Author:** ![HazelNutCoffee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ac91a4/32.png) [@HazelNutCoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HazelNutCoffee)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2010, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399/64 "2010-01-05T00:35:48Z")
> [@Tibbytoes](#): > > Personally, the _“dirty in a good way”_ type of ladies that I most appreciate are those who have the appearance and demeanor of your typical “skanky ho”, but who are, in fact, pretentious, high maintenance and profoundly frigid—but, I think I speak for most men in this regard. I would think it would typically be the other way around - the outwardly cool woman who’s an animal between the sheets? ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2010, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399/65 "2010-01-05T00:41:38Z")
> [@Tibbytoes](#): > > Personally, the _“dirty in a good way”_ type of ladies that I most appreciate are those who have the appearance and demeanor of your typical “skanky ho”, but who are, in fact, pretentious, high maintenance and profoundly frigid—but, I think I speak for most men in this regard. I agree with **HazelNut** –isn’t this the kind of woman that you see guys typically bitching about and eye rolling over? ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2010, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399/66 "2010-01-05T02:00:53Z")
> [@HazelNutCoffee](#): > > I would think it would typically be the other way around - the outwardly cool woman who’s an animal between the sheets? No, contrary to popular belief, all men want the appearance of impropriety, but the heart of innocence when it comes to sexual matters. We are, after all, simply trying to measure up to the high standards taught to us by our mothers. Now, you women, on the other hand…well, we need not open that wriggling can of worms right now… ---
**Author:** ![HazelNutCoffee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ac91a4/32.png) [@HazelNutCoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HazelNutCoffee)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2010, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399/67 "2010-01-05T02:35:46Z")
Maybe this is a woosh, but I have honestly no idea what you are going on about. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2010, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399/68 "2010-01-05T02:52:43Z")
> [@HazelNutCoffee](#): > > I would think it would typically be the other way around - the outwardly cool woman who’s an animal between the sheets? No, no. It’s the ice queen cockteases. Those are the ones you want to marry. To _Kaio_ – ALL men are dirty. It goes without saying. What makes a dirty woman exciting is that it’s unusual. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2010, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399/69 "2010-01-05T03:02:52Z")
> [@Tibbytoes](#): > > the _“dirty in a good way”_ type of ladies that I most appreciate are … pretentious, high maintenance and profoundly frigid I’ll be in my bunk. ---
**Author:** ![Yookeroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yookeroo/32/323_2.png) [@Yookeroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yookeroo)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2010, 8:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399/70 "2010-01-05T08:11:36Z")
> [@kingbighair](#): > > “Dirty” has a negative connotation when used in any way. It can be used interchangeably with slut, tramp, loose, etc. I’d like to see all of those lose their negative connotations. ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2010, 12:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399/71 "2010-01-06T12:10:40Z")
> [@](#): > > **cuauhtemoc** : Call it “dirty”, “naughty”, “slutty”, whatever, it’s really hard to be turned on when everything is totally straight-laced and by-the-book. Hence, “dirty-in-a-good-way”. No one here is suggesting being “straight-laced and by-the book” whatever that means…although “laced” sounds a little fun. Instead of _dirty_ and _slutty_ and other words with obviously negative connotations – that’s why you have to add on “in a good way” – why not use words to describe sex like _wild_ and _uninhibited_? Don’t go back to the stupid idea that uninhibited sex means that a woman is acting like a whore or a slut. What is the male equivalent for _whore_ or _slut_? What word(s) puts a man down in the same way? Crazy-wild sex is the most natural thing in the world when consenting adults are involved. There’s nothing nasty about it. Learn to love your body and your partner’s. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2010, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399/72 "2010-01-06T13:39:20Z")
I voted b, c, d, e, with my e) being group sex. “Swallows” is just a taste thing AFAIK, not a reflection on inhibitions. I’d like to think I’m a dirty boy, too. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-girl-dirty-in-a-good-way/523399.md?page=3)