# What makes a man attractive?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [January 8, 2003, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369 "2003-01-08T21:11:11Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Improv\_Geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Improv_Geek)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2003, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/1 "2003-01-08T21:11:11Z")
Alright, as a single student at a public college which might as well be ALL boys, I’m finding dates harder and harder to come by. So I need to up the ante and see what to do to make myself more… attractive to the opposite sex.
So ladies, what makes men attractive? I know you’re all different, I’m not looking for a cure-all, but I am trying to get an idea…
Thanks
Patrick - Slave to Georgia Tech
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### Author:  [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2003, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/2 "2003-01-08T21:34:44Z")
Speaking not as a female, but from life experience, women often find men with existing girlfriends irrestible. 😃
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### Author:  [@Banger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Banger)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2003, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/3 "2003-01-08T21:37:25Z")
Damned if I know. I’ve tried many things and nothing seems to work.
That “being yourself” stuff certainly doesn’t work. Being yourself only works if you’re already attractive. There are tons of unattractive people being themselves out there.
In the end, I think it has something to do with connections on the inside, e.g., you know someone who knows someone who’s part of the sisterhood.
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### Author:  [@Slainte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slainte)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2003, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/4 "2003-01-08T21:40:02Z")
Georgia Tech? Is _that_ where all the single men are hiding? 🙂
Seriously though, you’re right - there is no cure-all.
For the easy, superficial things:
Bathe often. Use deodorant. (Note: I assume you do these things; I just mention them for GP)
Get a good cologne. I recommend _Armani Acqua di Gio_.
Shave unless facial hair flatters you.
Wear decent clothes (doesn’t have to be too fancy though)
Not-so-superficial:
Find something you enjoy like a hobby or volunteer work - go do it. Best case scenario: You’ll meet someone who has similar hobbies/values to you. Worst case scenario: You won’t meet anyone but you still do something you enjoy/feel good about.
That’s really my best advice. Of course, it could be worthless because I’m still single and I do those things (different perfume, different parts to shave obviously).
Best Wishes
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### Author:  [@jazzmine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jazzmine)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2003, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/5 "2003-01-08T21:45:25Z")
Funny, smart, sarcastic, loving, kind, and love sex.
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### Author:  [@CRorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CRorex)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2003, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/6 "2003-01-08T21:56:15Z")
Pass along any tips you learn will you?
I’m starting to feel like that english Moss 😕
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### Author:  [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2003, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/7 "2003-01-08T22:00:25Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by CRorex \*
> \*\*Pass along any tips you learn will you?
>
> I’m starting to feel like that english Moss 😕 \*\*
Well, if you feel like Kate Moss, that’d explain why you’re having trouble finding dates.
I second the motion to find a hobby that isn’t date-finding-intensive. Find something to do that you enjoy, and so long as it isn’t a guys-only kind of thing, you’ll meet women.
Or you could join the cheerleading squad. Excuse me. Pep squad. “I’m not a cheerleader. I’m an athletic supporter.”
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### Author:  [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2003, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/8 "2003-01-08T23:04:36Z")
Take a good close look at me. The qualities that are missing are the ones the girls go for, in spades!
* * *
She said I was terribly handsome. Is that an insult?
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### Author:  [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2003, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/9 "2003-01-08T23:20:22Z")
One thing that really works well is to try and be attractive to individuals, not to the whole freaking gender. Find women that you genuinley like and want to get to know better on all sorts of levels ,and pay attention to what they do or say and discover what would make you more attractive to them.
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### Author:  [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2003, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/10 "2003-01-08T23:46:59Z")
What I think women find attractive are guys who search the board for previous topics on this 🙂
Surest way to attract a female if you’re a male is borrow a cute puppy or kitten & take it with you to the park.
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### Author:  [@monica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monica)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2003, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/11 "2003-01-08T23:51:23Z")
> [@](#):
>
> _originally posted by Slainte_
> Get a good cologne.
I would have to disagree on this one; every guy has their own unique scent (and I’m not talking about when they’ve not showered) that’s just slightly there and I find that a turn-on.
Definately shave.
If there’s something you have a passion for, try to meet other people with the same interest.
Funny
Intelligence
Confidence
Affectionate
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### Author:  [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)
#### Post date: [January 9, 2003, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/12 "2003-01-09T00:11:14Z")
Intelligent.
Bathed and groomed.
Humorous.
Kind.
Modest.
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### Author:  [@Slainte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slainte)
#### Post date: [January 9, 2003, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/13 "2003-01-09T00:11:17Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by monica \*
> \*\*I would have to disagree on this one; every guy has their own unique scent (and I’m not talking about when they’ve not showered) that’s just slightly there and I find that a turn-on.
>
> \*\*
Fair enough but _I_ find _Acqua di Gio_ to be a turn-on. Obviously, YMMV. 🙂
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### Author:  [@LilCutie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LilCutie)
#### Post date: [January 9, 2003, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/14 "2003-01-09T00:16:34Z")
My boyfriend transfered to Tech this past fall. I have been to visit him, and you’re right. Not many women. 🙂
Since you go there I assume you have intelligence covered. A good sense of humour is good, and to me, an outgoing personality is great too. A person who keeps up conversation well is great.
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### Author:  [@nashiitashii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nashiitashii)
#### Post date: [January 9, 2003, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/15 "2003-01-09T00:19:40Z")
I’m gonna agree with **monica** on the scent thing: I’ve got fairly reactive sinuses, and it drives me insane to have to endure a heavy scented person, whether it be BO, cologne, cigarette smoke or whathaveyou. I’d muchly prefer a guy’s natural scent or a light spritz of cologne, but just make sure you’re clean. Lots of cologne is not going to cover up the fact that you smell like a rotting Yeti.
Be able to make a woman laugh. Do things you like, and, if it looks like the women are interested in talking to you, talk about what you’re interested in and passionate about. Small talk about stuff you don’t really care about isn’t going to be as intellectually [or sexually] stimulating as a passionate discourse about what you truly have interest in.
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### Author:  [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)
#### Post date: [January 9, 2003, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/16 "2003-01-09T00:30:47Z")
14 replies and no one has mentioned nose and ear hair yet? Crazy!
Seriously, the answer is confidence. Confidence is how you get a girl to date you. All the other stuff (intelligence, sense of humor, consideration, etc.) are how you get a girl to keep dating you. But being the perfect boyfriend will do you no good if you can’t get girls to go out with you. So project confidence. Going to the gym and dressing nicely can really help you feel confident, or you can simply summon it from deep inside yourself through raw force of will. (This involves a lot of flexing alone in the bathroom.) You also need to force yourself to take risks, i.e. approaching and talking to women you don’t know, asking women out when you’re not sure if they’ll say yes, etc. You’ll be amazed how many more people you’ll end up dating if you just act brave and confident.
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### Author:  [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)
#### Post date: [January 9, 2003, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/17 "2003-01-09T00:46:59Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Giraffe \*
> \*\*14 replies and no one has mentioned nose and ear hair yet? Crazy!
> \*\*
Do many 18-22 year olds that _you_ know have those problems?
Anyway, building upon **Slainte** ’s volunteering idea, if you like kids, volunteer with them. I’ve worked with children since I graduated from college (1999) and I’ve already worked in two all female workplaces and volunteered in a program before that that was 90% female volunteers. Very few men have a lot of interest in the little ones, at least professionally, so you vounteering with them would be a novelty to the people you work with, and the little boys will love you. Most places do background checks, so no one will think you’re “wrong” for wanting to be around kids if your background checks out(I wonder if that worry keeps more men away, to be honest).
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### Author:  [@malkavia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/malkavia)
#### Post date: [January 9, 2003, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/18 "2003-01-09T00:54:07Z")
> [@](#):
>
> Do many 18-22 year olds that you know have those problems?
In **Giraffe** ’s defense, nose hair isn’t as unheard of with guys in their early 20’s as I would like it to be. 😉
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### Author:  [@presidebt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/presidebt)
#### Post date: [January 9, 2003, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/19 "2003-01-09T00:56:45Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Giraffe \*
> \*\*
> Seriously, the answer is confidence. Confidence is how you get a girl to date you. \*\*
Bingo. There’s a reason “Fake it till you make it” is a little saying.
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### Author:  [@Treviathan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Treviathan)
#### Post date: [January 9, 2003, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-a-man-attractive/147369/20 "2003-01-09T00:57:46Z")
And I’ve _definitely_ cornered the 22-year-old market on ear hair.
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