# What makes cynics...cynical?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [June 15, 2006, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763 "2006-06-15T03:05:57Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/21 "2006-06-15T16:53:43Z")

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To some extent, the people who are most likely to suspect others of _X_ (cheating, lying, or whatever) are those who are most prone to doing _X_ themselves.

I’m not suggesting this applies to all cynics, but it may well apply to some. (As, on the other side of the coin, people who are overly trusting may be so because it would never occur to them to be dishonest or try to take advantage of someone.)

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**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/22 "2006-06-15T16:54:36Z")

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> [@Anaamika](#):
>
> I’m a cynic and an optimist and an idealist and a romantic all at the same time. I’ma cynic because of the other three things…I have to protect myself somehow. So I hope for the best but expect the worst. I’ve got a sensitive little heart, it needs walls.

ditto.

AND, I think I’m unfairly branded a cynic by people who don’t know the meaning of the word well. I’m acerbic, biting and very very dry in my humor, and many people misinterpret that as my being cynical. I my say things that sound cynical, but I’m really just amusing myself (or trying to amuse others), I don’t always believe in what I’m saying.

Most of the time, inside, I’m optimistic. But I’m terrified of being thought stupid or wrong by predicting good when something’s actually bad. So I’ll say a thing is probably going to be bad and be “pleasantly surprised” when it’s good, because that way I don’t feel I’ll look foolish. I’d rather look cynical and mistaken than ignorant and wrong.

So it’s kinda complicated, for me.

Or it’s not complicated at all, and I’m just a broken, jaded romantic with an arrow through my heart and a bit of grit in my mantle.

(see? 😉 )

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**Author:** ![Lightray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightray/32/391_2.png) [@Lightray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightray)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/23 "2006-06-15T18:21:03Z")

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> [@Diamonds02](#):
>
> That’s pretty understandable. But, what about the cases when there’s little or no personal involvement. Has anyone visited [televisionwithoutpity.com](http://televisionwithoutpity.com)? There’s a LOT of cynical people there, yet it is highly unlikely that any of them will come in contact with those they seem to be so critical of. I was apalled to find out that some of them believed that this girl from the real world lied about having cancer just to get camera time. However, there’s zero evidence that this girl lied.

Heh. I visit (& post, as “Avery”) on [televisionwithoutpity.com](http://televisionwithoutpity.com), and reading your comment my first thought was “I could see that”.

I think their (our) particular cynicism in regards to television is well-earned, the result of bitter experience repeated over and over again. Having heard and seen documented all the bottom-feeding antics that the famewhores on shows like the Real World get up to, that wouldn’t shock me at all. Just like I’m naturally going to assume that most of the “drama” portrayed is contrived by script and/or editing.

To give another example in this context: I do not consider myself a cynic because I expect an episode of Seventh Heaven to be drek – _all_ Seventh Heaven episodes I’ve seen have been drek. I _would_ consider myself a cynic if I expected an episode of Battlestar: Galactica to be drek, since they’ve been good thus far.

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**Author:** ![YaWanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/bbce88/32.png) [@YaWanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaWanna)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/24 "2006-06-15T18:46:37Z")

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> [@WhyNot](#):
>
> ditto.
> 
> AND, I think I’m unfairly branded a cynic by people who don’t know the meaning of the word well. I’m acerbic, biting and very very dry in my humor, and many people misinterpret that as my being cynical. I my say things that sound cynical, but I’m really just amusing myself (or trying to amuse others), I don’t always believe in what I’m saying.

Me, too.

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**Author:** ![Walloon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/fbc32d/32.png) [@Walloon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walloon)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/25 "2006-06-15T18:59:22Z")

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> [@WhyNot](#):
>
> So I’ll say a thing is probably going to be bad and be “pleasantly surprised” when it’s good, because that way I don’t feel I’ll look foolish. I’d rather look cynical and mistaken than ignorant and wrong.

Cynicism is also ignorance if you are wrong. And the boy who cried wolf falsely too often was eventually ignored.

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**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/26 "2006-06-15T19:25:32Z")

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> [@Walloon](#):
>
> Cynicism is also ignorance if you are wrong. And the boy who cried wolf falsely too often was eventually ignored.

Not the way my brain works. It was oddly worded, I had a poor time articulating, so let me try an example:

Me: “We better leave extra time this morning. It’s gorgeous out, and all the Lincoln Park Trixies will be clogging up the roads.”  
My husband: “Cynical much? We’ll have plenty of time.”

If, in fact, the roads are a mess, I’m right, and that’s good. If I’m wrong and we get there early, it’s not because I was ignorant of anything, just that things weren’t as complicated as I predicted them to be. I thought it all out, and am therefore not dumb, just wrong. That’s OK. On the other hand, if it went like this:

Me: “Mapquest says we only need 18 minutes to get to the zoo, so if we leave at 20 'till, we should be fine.”

And, as it turns out, there’s tons of traffic, then I feel like an idiot for not thinking that of course, on a beautiful day more people will be out and about and traffic might be heavy. Now I feel dumb. I don’t like that.

So is that really being cynical, or just planning for the worst and hoping for the best? I get labelled cynical, but I don’t know that that’s accurate.

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**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/27 "2006-06-15T19:44:03Z")

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No matter how cynical you are, it’s impossible to keep up.

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**Author:** ![D\_Odds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/d_odds/32/2882_2.png) [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/28 "2006-06-15T19:50:21Z")

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> [@Walloon](#):
>
> Cynicism is also ignorance if you are wrong.

So if an optimist is wrong its…?  
If an idealist is wrong its…?  
If a pessimist is wrong its…?

I’m curious. Does that only apply to cynics, or is anyone who makes a mistake ignorant? And if it only applies to cynics, can you explain why?

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**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/29 "2006-06-15T19:58:27Z")

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> [@RealityChuck](#):
>
> No matter how cynical you are, it’s impossible to keep up.

Lily Tomlin! 🙂

I think cynicism is just a result of recognizing reality.

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**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/30 "2006-06-15T20:11:57Z")

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He might be saying that it’s ignorant if you always adopt that attitude, even if the situation you’re in doesn’t call for it. In point of fact, I’m not _that_ suspicious of people. I don’t trust instutitions at all, but when we’re dealing with idividuals I’m fairly trusting.

I’ve accepted the cynic label these days, but I think you can see I’m still not sure it’s accurate.

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**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/31 "2006-06-15T20:19:19Z")

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> [@Diamonds02](#):
>
> Then I recognized that I too have been screwed over a lot in my life, but I’m still not that cynical. I think there are other factors.

Must be that we’re smarter than you. 😉

Seriously, it’s tough not to sound like a dick in saying this (not that that’s ever stopped me before), but I don’t understand how someone could reach adulthood without being disappointed enough to know that most people aren’t trustworthy. Although I think not out of malice, mostly – more out of laziness, occasional stupidity, and an absent-mindedness borne out of not caring enough to take things seriously when others are depending on you for some reason. But yeah, if you’re not cynical, I think you’re pie-eyed, because there’s a lot more evidence on one side of the ledger than the other.

–Cliffy

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**Author:** ![XJETGIRLX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9fc29f/32.png) [@XJETGIRLX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XJETGIRLX)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/32 "2006-06-15T20:23:01Z")

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> [@Diamonds02](#):
>
> What do they gain by expecting the worst?

A head start on everyone else. Seriously. Not that we don’t appreciate when good things happen, but if you’ve steeled yourself for the worst you’re more likely to know how to handle it when it happens. You don’t often hear of people having to ‘prepare for good news’ now, do you?

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**Author:** ![Walloon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/fbc32d/32.png) [@Walloon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walloon)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/33 "2006-06-15T20:44:02Z")

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> [@D\_Odds](#):
>
> So if an optimist is wrong its…?  
> If an idealist is wrong its…?  
> If a pessimist is wrong its…?

Ignorance, ignorance, and ignorance.

Cynicism gets no exemption from charges of ignorance when it is wrong. That’s what my word “also” (“cynicism is also ignorance”) was all about. And if you are wrong again and again, people will start to tune you out.

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**Author:** ![XJETGIRLX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9fc29f/32.png) [@XJETGIRLX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XJETGIRLX)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/34 "2006-06-15T20:55:23Z")

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> [@Walloon](#):
>
> Ignorance, ignorance, and ignorance.
> 
> Cynicism gets no exemption from charges of ignorance when it is wrong. That’s what my word “also” (“cynicism is also ignorance”) was all about. And if you are wrong again and again, people will start to tune you out.

Then that’s a separate discussion altogether, and has nothing to do with why cynics are cynical. That’s an observation on the state of people who are wrong, not people who are cynics.

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**Author:** ![D\_Odds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/d_odds/32/2882_2.png) [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/35 "2006-06-15T21:06:41Z")

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> [@Walloon](#):
>
> Ignorance, ignorance, and ignorance.
> 
> Cynicism gets no exemption from charges of ignorance when it is wrong. That’s what my word “also” (“cynicism is also ignorance”) was all about. And if you are wrong again and again, people will start to tune you out.

Ah, I see.

If a person is wrong, it is ignorance. As I’ve been known to make a mistake maybe once a decade\* or so, I guess I’m ignorant.

decade…second…I keep getting those mixed up

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**Author:** ![mrklutz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ebca7d/32.png) [@mrklutz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mrklutz)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/36 "2006-06-15T21:07:20Z")

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> [@Diamonds02](#):
>
> What about young people? I think there’s more young cynics than older ones.

That’s because when we get old people start to call us curmudgeons. 😉

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**Author:** ![KlondikeGeoff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3e96dc/32.png) [@KlondikeGeoff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KlondikeGeoff)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/37 "2006-06-15T21:15:48Z")

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> [@jayjay](#):
>
> If you scratch a cynic, you’ll find a romantic. It’s the constant disappointment of being faced with reality-as-it-is when you’re expecting reality-as-it-should-be that layers the cynic’s armor around him, like nacre over a grain of sand in the mantle of an oyster.

Bravo! (Or Brava, as the case may be).

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**Author:** ![Lightray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightray/32/391_2.png) [@Lightray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightray)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/38 "2006-06-15T21:21:29Z")

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> [@Walloon](#):
>
> Cynicism is also ignorance if you are wrong. And the boy who cried wolf falsely too often was eventually ignored.

If a cynic cries wolf, and I get eaten, then at least he tried to warn me.

If an optomist insists that there is no wolf, and I get eaten, then he’s pretty much at fault for my becoming lunch.

If the cynic cries wolf, and I’m so stupid as to not believe him this time, and I get eaten, then the world is no worse off for losing me, is it?

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**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/39 "2006-06-15T21:24:53Z")

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> [@Diamonds02](#):
>
> What do they gain by expecting the worst?

Here’s a big chunk of your confusion. What you expect is decided by several factors, such as previous experience and general mindset. It’s not the sort of thing you can do a cost-benefit analysis of. It just happens.

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**Author:** ![Diamonds02](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b5a626/32.png) [@Diamonds02](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diamonds02)\
**Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-makes-cynics-cynical/360763/40 "2006-06-15T22:06:49Z")

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> [@Thudlow Boink](#):
>
> To some extent, the people who are most likely to suspect others of _X_ (cheating, lying, or whatever) are those who are most prone to doing _X_ themselves.
> 
> I’m not suggesting this applies to all cynics, but it may well apply to some. (As, on the other side of the coin, people who are overly trusting may be so because it would never occur to them to be dishonest or try to take advantage of someone.)

> [@Cliffy](#):
>
> Must be that we’re smarter than you.
> 
> Seriously, it’s tough not to sound like a dick in saying this (not that that’s ever stopped me before), but I don’t understand how someone could reach adulthood without being disappointed enough to know that most people aren’t trustworthy. Although I think not out of malice, mostly – more out of laziness, occasional stupidity, and an absent-mindedness borne out of not caring enough to take things seriously when others are depending on you for some reason. But yeah, if you’re not cynical, I think you’re pie-eyed, because there’s a lot more evidence on one side of the ledger than the other.
> 
> –Cliffy

Interesting. I wouldn’t say that I’m dumb, but I’m pretty impulsive and not the most reflective person. I’m definately capable of slowing down and thinking critically, but it’s not something I do naturally. I’m also pretty straightfoward and even a little blunt. I may expect and assume subconsciously that everyone else is the same way.

Until a year or two ago, the only things I cared about was good food, sleeping, parties, and sports. Again, I probably assumed that everyone else is the same way. Those things are still high on my list but getting stable/decent income and moving out has jumped up on my list also. The latter takes a little bit more calculation and planning. And yes, the more I plan, scheme, and strategize the more I recognize other people doing the same thing. But, while I think I’m becoming more realistic, I don’t think I’m getting to the cynical point.

Then again, one of my aunts is more of a “hippie” than I am, but she is the MOST cynical person I’ve ever known. Back to square one! :smack:

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