I would die. I would scream and run around and cry and not be able to hold still so someone could get it off…and then I would just die, right there, from a massive heart attack.
::flails around with the willies::
I find it interesting that we both fear mold (or ‘‘mould’’ depending on where you’re from.) Have you ever read Poe’s short story The Cask of Amontillado? The murderer entombs the victim in a moldy wine cellar. shudder
Most intriguing though, is everything else you hate. Jellyfish, slugs, snails and worms, are you KIDDING me? They are the physical manifestation of joy. Every day I wake up in the morning and I think about the fact that such creatures exist, and it makes me feel happy to be alive. Sometimes, when I’m feeling down, I seek out photographs of sea-slugs on the internet. Living slimy things restore hope to my life.
Mucous.
I can’t even say the other words for the stuff in your nose, coming out of your nose etc.
I am gagging slightly while writing this…
Made having little kids interesting- but even they learned never to use those horrible words around me- mucous is the only acceptable word!
Passing neuroses unto the next generation…
At least I’m snot afraid of that.
In addition to wasps, I can’t stand June bugs. I’m not afraid of them, but I hate them. Anything that lands on my head and won’t die when I strike it with enough force to hurt myself - deserves to die a horrible flaming, firery death.
I’m watching you… 
with my little bag of June bugs at the ready…
This thread has given me a cumulative attack of the willies.
How phlemboyant of you!
Okay so before I tell my bee story, I will say that I hate ALL bugs. I don’t care what it is, I friggin hate them!!
Now for my tramatizing tale…
I was probably around 8 or 9 when my family and I went on a “vacation” to Colorado. We were stopping to rest at the top of a huge mountain which we had just hiked, and my mom had set her backpack under the ONLY tree on the top of the mountain. When she went to retrieve the bag a whole swarm of bees came out of the tree and FLEW UP HER SHORTS!!
I started running away and screaming and I was slowly inching closer and closer to the edge of the cliff. My mother was trying to ME calm while she was pulling all of the dead bees out of her shorts.
Luckily, I did not fall of the cliff. My mother’s legs however swelled up like balloons and she was in much pain and discomfort.
But to this day when I see a bee, wasp, hornet, or a fly that I think might be a bee…I make sure that the opening to the current bottom I am wearing is securely closed.
I should bee afraid of hornets and wasps but oddly I can control it. When I was 4 I walked into a freshly mowed field and stepped on a nest of something. By the time I fell screaming to the floor of the kitchen I looked like a stawberry. I got seriously nailed by the little buggers. I’ve had my run-ins through the years with stinging bugs and the buzzing sound triggers panic but… Just like the scene in Jurasic park where the guy is told to stop moving… I stop moving. If a wasp lands on me I’m a statue. However, the day I meet up with Africanized honey bees I will run screaming like a little girl. FYI, you have to run something like 1000 feet to get them to stop chaising you.
I’ve stepped in bees nests, and they don’t seem to mind. I just weekwacked above one last week and stopped the weekwacker to adjust the line. I heard a hissing sound where I had just trimmed - turned out it was a bees nest. They didn’t bother coming out after me. They are such docile little creatures.
I have stepped in yellowjackets nets twice. They are NOT docile. They went after my ankles like Oprah after a donut. But, I know if I give them space, they will leave me alone. Wasps just seem to seek and destroy, so I try to do the same to them. Last year they stung me when I was walking by my pool. they had built a nest under the overhang on the above ground pool trim. I got stung 6 times by two of them. So, I set the pool pump on high, turned the filter on backwash, used the discharge hose, and blasted their nest into oblivion. Nothing like Karma 
Spiders, when they startle me. I can deal with them on a normal basis and have no issues removing or squishing them (sorry, but I’m inclined to kill spiders in my house). However, I can still (far too vividly) recall driving just up the street to my pharmacy when a spider unexpectedly dropped down in front of me from the rear view mirror. To date, I am still unable to recount precisely how I maintained control of my bowels AND kept the car on the road (although I did swerve a bit). But I did let out a decidedly un-masculine yelp. The worst part was that I couldn’t figure out where the spider went after that, and I spent the rest of my drive shaking and nervously eyeing every crevice in the car instead of the road in front of me.
There is also the story of a friend of mine visiting the house. We were out on the back patio, where there are plenty of spiders roaming happily on the lawn and such (fine by me). But my friend decided it would be funny to suddenly scream and yell, “Asimovian, there’s a spider on your back!” at me to get a reaction. The claim is that I leapt several feet into the air and contorted my arms into positions the arms aren’t meant to experience in an effort to rid myself of the offender. My recollection is that I was perfectly cool and collected and didn’t react in the least. 
I also tend to be freaky about flying, stinging things (including bees) because I’ve never been stung, and I’m deathly afraid of what it feels like.
My husband’s terrified of spiders, and he’s spooked for a day or so after seeing one. Yesterday I was sitting behind him in the car, tickling the back of his neck. He kept insisting, “That does NOT creep me out. shudder It doesn’t creep me out! I know it’s you!” I kept asking, innocently, “What are you TALKING about?”
My brother in law was next to him. BIL (awesome torture assistant that he is) looked over at the scene, made a quick surprised face, and reached over and slapped behind my husband’s head. Poor thing. I saw his shoulders freeze and heard the squeak, but I didn’t see his face. Pity. BIL says the subtle layer of terror that came over him was just perfect.
Which level of hell are we destined for, you think?
Anytime, during Halloween (the first original move,) that the Michael Myers “mask” suddenly appears. Christ, I’ve seen that movie every year since a was 14 or so and every single time he appears I have to squinch up into a little ball and shudder and groan. Same thing happens to me with the first few notes of the theme song. Scariest flippin’ creature evah!
Aren’t cattails those “corn dog on a tall stem” looking things that grow by swamps? What DO the seeds look like? I’ve never seen a floral arrangement with them. But, maybe you mean those things that look like a bees nest on a stick with nut-like seeds nestled in each hole of the almost honeycomb-like pattern?
I can’t picture this nor why someone would break open a cattail…
Yes, the corndog on a stem looking things. Some people (me) think they’re pretty in a fall arrangement.
They don’t need to be broken. When they’re ripe, they explode at the slightest touch.
The seeds look like dirty fiberglass insulation that has been whirled in a blender, and are at least a bazillion times flufflier than while still attached to the stick. They’re itchy and clog a vacuum cleaner filter in a hot second, which makes cleaning up the mess a thoroughly miserable job.
The ones in floral arrangements are supposed to be treated somehow so they don’t explode, but it’s not a perfect treatment.
Yep, killed one o’ them in the basement the other day. Man that was a mess. I’m gonna have to go down to the hardware store for some glue traps this weekend.
Bats kind of creep me out, but I’m ok with them. I’ve come to trust that they know what they’re doing.
I don’t like roaches, but I respect their tenacity. I find one in my apartment, though, I’ll set down enough poison to make the Tokyo subway gas attack look like a mild fart.
Spiders, though… shudder
I didn’t think I would have anything to add to this, but I am sitting here minding my own business at work when I see something dark moving on the wall in front of me, not three feet away. I slowly look up not wanting to see it…
CENTIPEDE!!! I flew out of my desk, I am sure much to the amusement of my boss, who incidentally wouldn’t touch it. By the time my other boss got to it, it had fallen onto the floor between my desk and the wall. Okay, now, I am wearing sandals. I swear if I feel a tickle on my feet, they are going to have to fix the ceiling.
I used to have a habit of raising my garage door enough so I could get in and ducking under the raised door and then closing it behind me.
One time during this process, I felt a tickle in my ear. Rubbed my ear and it went away.
Later on that day, I was sitting on the couch and got that tickling feeling again. Rubbed my ear and it went away.
I was working on the computer and felt it again. So, I went in the bathroom, and held onto the edge of the sink, and shook the side of my head (like you do if you have water in your ear). Felt like there was water in there but it wasn’t coming out. I shook harder several times, and plop!
This came out of my ear and landed in the sink.
I have stopped ducking under garage doors.
Jesus Christ I knew posting in this thread was a bad idea. I was mowing the backyard which is mostly woods so all kinds of evil are able to lurk there. I just got started mowing and out pops this friggin huge black snake. It HAD TO BE six feet long, at least it was slithering away from me and into the neighbors yard. After I finish this post and have a couple of vodka and tonics I’m going man-up and get back out there.
Karma is a bitch I tell ya. 
ew ew ew ew ew ew ew…
I have a grimace of horror permanently frozen onto my face now. I hope you’re happy.