# What might your epitaph be? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 23, 2023, 9:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587 "2023-09-23T09:08:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2023, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/41 "2023-09-24T02:20:10Z")
Not sure, I’ve said that when I die I want all useful organs donated for reuse, all interesting bits donated to science and the rest put in a garbage bag for the garbage truck to carry wherever they carry all organic residue. That said I wouldn’t be too angry if I get a tombstone with a D20 and the words “Roll initiative”… ---
**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2023, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/42 "2023-09-24T03:07:24Z")
"he was the nicest dickhead we knew " ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2023, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/43 "2023-09-24T03:22:27Z")
> [@Al128](#): > > or go full M-Py: > . > That’s just a flesh wound _the salmon mousse!_ ---
**Author:** ![scudsucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scudsucker/32/14101_2.png) [@scudsucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scudsucker)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2023, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/44 "2023-09-24T05:35:09Z")
> [@Frodo](#): > > I want all useful organs donated for reuse, all interesting bits donated to science I want the same, but in the spirit of the OP, I would start my epitaph with “Here lies _some_ of the remains of…” ---
**Author:** ![Al128](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/al128/32/16541_2.png) [@Al128](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Al128)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2023, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/45 "2023-09-24T19:18:23Z")
reminds me of the old Cher joke … some parts of her are 75 years old … ---
**Author:** ![Pardel-Lux](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pardel-lux/32/20182_2.png) [@Pardel-Lux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pardel-Lux)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2023, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/46 "2023-09-24T19:50:28Z")
It already feels like shit [![](https://st2.depositphotos.com/6840962/11053/v/950/depositphotos_110532722-stock-illustration-no-dog-pooping-signs-black.jpg) ](https://st2.depositphotos.com/6840962/11053/v/950/depositphotos_110532722-stock-illustration-no-dog-pooping-signs-black.jpg) Please don’t make it worse. ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2023, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/47 "2023-09-30T01:37:51Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > Combine your line of work and love of sudden loud noises with the now-common silliness of a gender reveal party. > > So after the appropriate words are said and the crowd is gathered a charge will be set, your ashes placed atop, and the blast detonated to perform the scattering in fine EOD style. The crowd can attempt to divine your ghost’s gender and attitude to haunting from the color of the smoke and flying powder. I’m stealing this idea, and doubling down on something: my ‘urn’ will be a plywood box labelled “ACME”, wired to an old-timey hellbox, and my wife has to hell: “Fire in the hole, fire in the hole, fire in the hole . . . Meep meep!” before plunging the handle. Tripler I need to write this down before I die and they throw me a _classy_ funeral. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2023, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/48 "2023-09-30T02:09:21Z")
Given the chance, I will totally be there to toast your life well-lived and assist in sending you flying in fine style. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2023, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/49 "2023-09-30T02:48:40Z")
‘Johnny _who?_’ ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2023, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/50 "2023-09-30T21:25:21Z")
I wish I could find that old headstone PS where the engraving supposedly read “\< / l i f e \>”. ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2023, 11:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/51 "2023-10-01T11:42:55Z")
I’m putting you in my will! Do you want my _Battletech_ or _StarFleet Battles_ collection? Tripler I have other ‘professional gear’ if’n that’s more your style. ---
**Author:** ![Icerigger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icerigger/32/432_2.png) [@Icerigger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icerigger)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2023, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/52 "2023-10-01T17:47:37Z")
He Tried ---
**Author:** ![Kropotkin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kropotkin/32/18045_2.png) [@Kropotkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kropotkin)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2023, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/53 "2023-10-01T19:16:15Z")
Given your recent thread, I suggest you change “Reliable” to “Inspiring” and/or “Awesome” ---
**Author:** ![Kropotkin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kropotkin/32/18045_2.png) [@Kropotkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kropotkin)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2023, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/54 "2023-10-01T19:18:43Z")
I’m thinking, “You know those cookies you ate the wake? My ashes were in them.” ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2023, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/55 "2023-10-01T19:30:27Z")
Awww… 😊 ---
**Author:** ![Buck\_Godot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/buck_godot/32/6573_2.png) [@Buck\_Godot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_Godot)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2023, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/56 "2023-10-02T23:32:35Z")
“Could be worse” ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2023, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/57 "2023-10-03T01:01:38Z")
“Three stars” ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2023, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/58 "2023-10-03T01:14:22Z")
Witnesses awarded the other driver both ears and the tail. ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2023, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/59 "2023-10-03T01:37:21Z")
_It’s Hot. It’s Oppressive. The Host’s a Devilish Tyrant. Hope to See You Soon!_ ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2023, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587/60 "2023-10-03T06:09:33Z")
I won’t be sure till the third time [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-might-your-epitaph-be/990587.md?page=2)