# What movie would you recast... with Muppets? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 24, 2004, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423 "2004-11-24T05:25:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2004, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/121 "2004-12-19T03:57:08Z")
> [@Zabali\_Clawbane](#): > > How about recasting “The Wizard of Oz” with Muppets? Kermit could be the Scarecrow, and Miss Piggy could be Dorothy? The two old geezers who heckled poor Fozzie could be the Wicked Witches, and Fozzie could be the cowardly lion. Gonzo could be the Tin Woodman, and the female band member could be Glinda. Instead of winged monkeys, you could have magic chickens that could fly well? The scientist who was always blowing poor Beaker up could be Oz, and Sam the Eagle could be the gate guard. Hehe, that could actually be a funny movie. Given that the soon-to-be filmed _Muppet Wizard of Oz_ is the very movie that inspired this thread… > [@The OP](#): > > There is a television remake of The Wizard of Oz coming out next year with an all Muppet cast. So, given the complete cooperation of the appropriate copyright holders and the Jim Henson estate, what movies would you recast with Muppets? ---
**Author:** ![Zabali\_Clawbane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/ecd19e/32.png) [@Zabali\_Clawbane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zabali_Clawbane)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2004, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/122 "2004-12-19T04:03:26Z")
:smack: I just read the thread title, and posed an idea. I’ve not paid much attention to the Muppets in years, so had no clue that such a thing was happeneing. :o ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2004, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/123 "2004-12-19T04:05:07Z")
> [@Zabali\_Clawbane](#): > > :smack: I just read the thread title, and posed an idea. I’ve not paid much attention to the Muppets in years, so had no clue that such a thing was happeneing. :o No snark intended, ma’am. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![The\_Great\_Zamboni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@The\_Great\_Zamboni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Zamboni)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2004, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/124 "2004-12-21T16:14:23Z")
> [@Zabali\_Clawbane](#): > > :smack: I just read the thread title, and posed an idea. I’ve not paid much attention to the Muppets in years, so had no clue that such a thing was happeneing. :o Hey, no problem. Just keep making up ideas. ---
**Author:** ![Rhubarb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/59ef9b/32.png) [@Rhubarb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhubarb)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/125 "2004-12-22T18:57:06Z")
**Blazing Muppets** Kermit as the Sheriff “One step closer and the toad gets it!” Miss Piggy in the Madeleine Kahn role Sam the Eagle as “Taggart” Fozzie Bear as Mel Brooks Animal as “Mojo” Gonzo as Gene Wilder. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/126 "2004-12-22T19:09:41Z")
> [@Rhubarb](#): > > Sam the Eagle as “Taggart” He’d be better as Hedley Lamarr. > [@](#): > > Animal as “Mojo” Or [Sweetums](http://homepage.mac.com/stacieburrows/.cv/stacieburrows/Sites/.Pictures/sweetums.JPG-thumb_205_273.jpg). And don’t you mean “Mongo”? ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/127 "2004-12-22T19:57:39Z")
OK, how did I miss this the first time around? **Furry Saddles** Sherriff Bart – Kermit (of course) The Waco Kid (Jim) – Fozzie Lillie Von Schtupp – Miss Piggy The Governor – Big Bird Hedley Lamarr – Bert Taggart – Ernie Mongo – Animal (the giant version) Townspeople Howard Johnson – Sam the Eagle ??? Johnson (The Kinda Nerdy One) – Gonzo Reverend Johnson – Cookie Monster Gabby Johnson – Oscar the Grouch Scene where the Sherriff rides to town for the first time: Gabby (Oscar): Hey! The Sherriff is a F– :: Bell Tolls :: Gonzo Johnson: What’d he say? Scene where Sherriff Kermit stays the night with Piggy von Schtupp: Miss Piggy: Is it twoo what they say about fwogs? Kermit: Zzzzzip Miss Piggy: Oh! It’s twoo! It’s twoo! Scene where Hedley Lamarr is reciting the type of people they’ll need: Bert Lamarr: We’ll need cut-throats, murderers, _etc, etc, etc_ Ernie Taggart: (Finally pulls out notepad). OK, what was that, Bert? Scene where the Sheriff and the Kid need to see what the line of bad guys is all about. They spy some Klansmen at the end of the line, played by Ralph and another dog muppet. Fozzie: Boys! Oh Boys! Look what I got! Sherriff Kermit: Where my bitches at? Miscellaneous: Animal Mongo: Animal just pawn in game of life! ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/128 "2004-12-22T19:59:22Z")
D’oh! That’s what I get for spending so long putting together my version. Sorry, **Rhubarb** … ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/129 "2004-12-22T20:15:52Z")
OK, I don’t think anyone else has done this one yet: **The Road to Muppet Morocco** Kermit T Frog: Bing Crosby … Jeff Peters Fozzie Bear: Bob Hope … Orville ‘Turkey’ Jackson/Aunt Lucy Miss Piggy: Dorothy Lamour … Princess Shalmar Sam the Eagle: Anthony Quinn … Mullay Kassim Kermit Peters: We must storm the place. Orville ‘Fozzie’ Jackson: You storm. I’ll stay here and drizzle. Fozzie Jackson: Aunt Lucy. I can see her now, lying on her dying bed, looking at you with those big, trusting eyes. ‘Before I go, Fozzie, promise me one thing,’ she said. ‘Promise me you’ll always be a friend to little Kermit,’ she said. ‘No matter what happens, you’ll never leave the little jerk,’ she said. ‘Promise me, Fozzie, promise me,’ she said. Kermit Peters: Yeah, then she up and died before I had the chance to say no. Or maybe I should reverse the rolls for Kermit and Fozzie … Kermit Jackson: We’re going to get married on, uh, when is the big day, Dream Thing? Princess Piggy: When the moon, in it’s last quarter, silvers the blossoms of the almond tree. That’s Tuesday night, about nine. Kermit Jackson: A fine thing. First you sell me for two hundred bucks. Then I’m gonna marry the Princess, then you cut in on me. Then we’re carried off by a desert sheik. Now, we’re gonna have out heads chopped off. Fozzie Peters: I know all that. Kermit Jackson: Yeah, but the people who came in the middle of the picture don’t. Fozzie Peters: You mean they missed my song? ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/130 "2004-12-22T20:40:27Z")
> [@ouryL](#): > > Say, didn’t the South Park boys want to remake \*Day After Tomorrow \* with Muppets, without changing a line of dialogue? Actually, \*Team America \* was originally supposed to be a parody of _The Day After Tomorrow_, but eventually they decided to just parody action movies and the War on Terror. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/131 "2004-12-22T20:40:32Z")
**Kermitula** - never saw this movie, so I can’t suggest recasts, but the concept appeals to me. **Being Kermit the Frog** - Kermit the Frog - John Malkovich role Fozzie Bear - John Cusack’s role Miss Piggy - Cameron Diaz’s role Janice - Catherine Keener’s role **Mulholland Muppet** - Miss Piggy - Betty / Dian Janice - Rita / Camilla Waldorf & Astor - coots that ‘Betty’ meets on the plane Sam the Eagle - cop #1 Fozzie Bear - cop #2 Oscar the Grouch - weird guy behind the dumpster Scooter - movie director Gonzo - the cowboy Dr. Teeth - bad hitman ---
**Author:** ![GrizzRich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7ba0ec/32.png) [@GrizzRich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrizzRich)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/132 "2004-12-22T20:59:15Z")
9 1/2 Weeks. ---
**Author:** ![Cranky\_Hermit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/13edae/32.png) [@Cranky\_Hermit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cranky_Hermit)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/133 "2004-12-22T21:11:40Z")
Barbarella…I’d love to see the sex-via-pill scene with Miss Piggy and Kermit! ---
**Author:** ![bughunter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aeb1de/32.png) [@bughunter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bughunter)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/134 "2004-12-22T21:26:35Z")
I have to say, out of the whole thread, the three best suggestions have been: - _Monty Python and The Holy Grail_ (Miss Piggy must play Zoot/Dingo. “And then, the oral sex.”) - _Aliens_ (Ellen Ripley is the role that Miss Piggy _thinks_ she is born for.) - _Sunset Boulevard_ (Whereas Norma Desmond is the role Miss Piggy is _actually_ born for.) _Pulp Fiction_ and _Reservoir Dogs_ would work, but I think the best Tarantino flick for the Muppets would be **Jackie Brown**. The personalities of the characters and the muppets are a perfect fit, and cast size and the ratio of male to female roles are just right. (Not to mention the prospect of Gonzo delivering the line “AK-47. When you absolutely, positively have to kill every maryland farmer in the room.”) C’mon, isn’t this casting just _ **perfect??** _: Jackie Brown – Miss Piggy Ordell “maryland farmer” Robbie – Gonzo Max Cherry – Kermit Melanie the Pothead – Janice Louis Gara – Oscar the Grouch Beaumont Livingston – Fozzie Ray Nicollette – Ernie Mark Dargus – Bert Winston – Animal Chicks Who Love Guns – the Chickens I was torn over Gonzo vs. Uncle Deadly for the role of Ordell… Uncle Deadly has the charisma and the dangly chin thing going, but Gonzo wins by being the one more likely to view a video entitled “Chicks Who Love Guns.” Gonzo can pull it off, and when he does, it’ll revitalize his career. I repeat, _Jackie Brown_ is the perfect movie for a muppet makeover. ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/135 "2004-12-22T21:47:34Z")
The Musical Phantom of the Opera. Kermit as Roaul. Ms. Piggy as Christine. Gonzo as the Phantom. Waldolf and what’s his name as the two managers. Rolf as Piagini. Janice as Carlotta as Meg as Mdm Giry Chickens as ballet dances. Unfortunatly, the distinct lack of female muppets is going to make some of the casting difficult. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/136 "2004-12-22T22:54:34Z")
> [@Art Vandelay](#): > > **Kermitula** - never saw this movie, so I can’t suggest recasts, but the concept appeals to me. And by “this movie” - I mean “Caligula”, not “Dracula” (as my coworker just pointed out.) But as for a “Dracula” inspired Muppet movie: Johnathan Harker: Kermit the Frog Count Dracula: Gonzo Three Brides: Prunella and two other chickens gypsies: Rizzo & other rats Mina Murray Harker: Miss Piggy Lucy Westenra: Sally (the pigtailed, only-girl muppet from “Sesame Street”) Prof. Van Helsing: the Swedish Chef Dr. Jack Seward: Fozzie the Bear Quincey P. Morris : Scooter Renfield: Animal When “Van Helsing” appears for the first time, he’ll be lecturing in Amsterdam, and two of the attendants will be Dr. Bunson Honeydew and Beeker. “the Count” (from Sesame Street) should have a cameo. As Gonzo/Dracula is stalking the streets of London, he’ll walk past the Count. They’ll both do a double-take, turn & look at each other. “Hey Count” Gonzo Dracula will say, “Yo!” the Count will reply. Then, they’ll go their seperate ways. ---
**Author:** ![AwSnappity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a3d4f5/32.png) [@AwSnappity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AwSnappity)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/137 "2004-12-22T23:25:20Z")
> [@Art Vandelay](#): > > **Mulholland Muppet** - > Miss Piggy - Betty / Dian > Janice - Rita / Camilla > Waldorf & Astor - coots that ‘Betty’ meets on the plane > Sam the Eagle - cop #1 > Fozzie Bear - cop #2 > Oscar the Grouch - weird guy behind the dumpster > Scooter - movie director > Gonzo - the cowboy > Dr. Teeth - bad hitman Announcer at Club Silencio (I think that’s the name): Dr. Bunson Honeydew, only for the reason that it sets up… Singer at Club Silencio: Beaker! I would love to hear a high pitched “Llorando” done only in his signature “Mee mee mee”. The skeevy old guy that Betty auditions with: Sweetums Coco: [Ma Gorg](http://www.fragglerocker.com/media/pics.asp?galleryName=gorgs) ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/138 "2004-12-22T23:36:28Z")
**Trembling before Fr-g** Jewish muppets seen in silhouette discuss the conflict between their sexuality and spirituality. **Kermie Potter and the Half-Frog Prince** Harry\_\_\_\_\_\_Kermit Herminone\_\_\_\_\_\_Piggy Ron\_\_\_\_\_\_Gonzo Hagrid\_\_\_\_\_\_Animal Lord Voldemort\_\_\_\_\_\_Sam the Eagle Snape\_\_\_\_\_\_The Count Dumblesdore\_\_\_\_\_\_Having a little trouble with this. Ideas? Current DADA instructor\_\_\_\_\_\_Oscar “Animagous” Grouch **12 Froggies** Kermit [James Cole], a post-apocalyptic criminal, returns to the past in a desperate attempt to circumvent the cult of the 12 Froggies. Piggy gives an electrifying performance as shrink Kathryn Railly. Beaker as the deranged Jeffrey Goines is entertaining but arguably a poor casting decision. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/139 "2004-12-22T23:45:23Z")
Oh, yeah–\*\*Koyaanifrogsi \*\*, \*\*Pigaqqatsi \*\* and \*\*Nagonzoqatsi \*\* Talk about your “lifeout of balance…” _Koyaa\_\_na\_frogski\_\_\_ Koyaa\_\_na\_frogski\_\_\_…_ ---
**Author:** ![AwSnappity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a3d4f5/32.png) [@AwSnappity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AwSnappity)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423/140 "2004-12-22T23:53:35Z")
> [@Shoshana](#): > > Oh, yeah–\*\*Koyaanifrogsi \*\*, \*\*Pigaqqatsi \*\* and \*\*Nagonzoqatsi \*\* Talk about your “lifeout of balance…” > > _Koyaa\_\_na\_frogski\_\_\_ > Koyaa\_\_na\_frogski\_\_\_…_ I had to sit through those movies for a film class this semester. But the thought of seeing them recast with Muppets makes it all worth it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-movie-would-you-recast-with-muppets/276423.md?page=8)