# What shall be painted on my naked rear end? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 19, 2001, 10:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039 "2001-07-19T10:54:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19adc/32.png) [@Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 10:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/1 "2001-07-19T10:54:36Z")
This Sunday is the Barebuns run down on [Wreck Beach](http://www.wreckbeach.org). Yep, I will be jogging naked through the sand and surf this Sunday, surrounded by a few thousand bare-assed participants and cheering fans. In year one, Mrs. B had a nice forest scene painted on her tushie, and we ended up on local TV. I’m just glad no one recognized me, since it’s where I work :eek: Last year I had to run solo, and got someone to draw that ‘as seen on TV’ logo visible on all the best kitchy household objects. Then I was interviewed by a former intern now working at a radio station. Several of my co-workers had laughter-induced near-misses when they heard the report while driving into work the next morning. For my third time running this race I have decided to go whole hog and actually put some forethought into the derriere design. Currently, I’m thinking of a cocktail glass, given my penchant for a fine martini. So offer up your suggestions! Remember, they must be simple enough for Mrs. B to draw, so no reproductions of Mona Lisa… You’ve got 24 hours, since I don’t have web access on weekends. ---
**Author:** ![BooBoo316](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e0b2c6/32.png) [@BooBoo316](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BooBoo316)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 11:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/2 "2001-07-19T11:19:33Z")
Couple of thoughts: Big pair of lips. How patriotic are you? Put a flag on there. Playboy bunny symbol Street sign - Stop sign, Yield sign, etc. Pair of eyes and glasses. One or more of the smilies from SDMB. Mu Mu’s list of banned Dopers. On second thought, forget that last one. Have fun! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 11:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/3 "2001-07-19T11:24:57Z")
An M on the left cheek, an M on the right cheek, and when you bend over it’ll spell MOM. Marc ---
**Author:** ![bunnymom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c4cdca/32.png) [@bunnymom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bunnymom)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 11:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/4 "2001-07-19T11:26:04Z")
And if you stand on your head, it’ll say WOW! ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 11:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/5 "2001-07-19T11:31:26Z")
Theatrical comedy/tragedy masks? Yin/Yang? ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 11:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/6 "2001-07-19T11:33:00Z")
I think it’s got to be some sort of paired symbols anyway. ---
**Author:** ![kabbes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e99b99/32.png) [@kabbes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kabbes)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 11:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/7 "2001-07-19T11:39:39Z")
“Ceci n’est pas une derierre” or a bullseye target pan ---
**Author:** ![don\_Jaime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b4bc9f/32.png) [@don\_Jaime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_Jaime)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/8 "2001-07-19T13:41:45Z")
“U” on one side, “ME” on the other, “NOTHING” down the center. Assume nothing. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/9 "2001-07-19T13:49:25Z")
“EXIT ONLY” ---
**Author:** ![Carina42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Carina42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carina42)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/10 "2001-07-19T15:10:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Johnny L.A. \* > \*\*“EXIT ONLY” > \*\* rotflmao. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Grok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/96bed5/32.png) [@Grok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grok)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/11 "2001-07-19T15:18:11Z")
“Yes” on the left cheek, “No” on the right. Always take the opportunity to remind people to pass on the left… ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/12 "2001-07-19T16:15:22Z")
THIS END UP KISS ME WIDE LOAD PLEASE USE OTHER DOOR You could use any one of those Hazardous Materials triangles (like truckers use). Or you could just stick or draw a Jesus/Darwin fish on the cheek of your choice… ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/13 "2001-07-19T16:56:24Z")
Biohazard symbol? ---
**Author:** ![WIGGUM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ce7236/32.png) [@WIGGUM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WIGGUM)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/14 "2001-07-19T16:56:43Z")
How about a drawing of a guy on your lower back holding a fishing pole with the line hanging down into your butt crack? ---
**Author:** ![tevya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4491bb/32.png) [@tevya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tevya)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/15 "2001-07-19T17:04:24Z")
I like the paired symbols idea that Mangetout has. Or how about painting on a couple of bumper stickers. One could say, “My other ass is a Ferrari.” Another could say, “If you can read this, you are too close.” WIGGUM’s idea is pretty funny too. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/16 "2001-07-19T17:04:59Z")
**Bumperstickers:** “If you can read this, you’re too damned close” “Get off my ass” “In case of rapture, \” “All your ass are belong to us.” “Don’t blame me, I voted for \” “Your ad here” **Images:** Alfred E. Newman A yield sign Recycle symbol ---
**Author:** ![seawitch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@seawitch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seawitch)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/17 "2001-07-19T18:27:14Z")
“If found, please drop in nearest mailbox.” ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/18 "2001-07-19T18:37:16Z")
Objects in mirror are larger than they appear. ---
**Author:** ![Lady\_Juliet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cc9497/32.png) [@Lady\_Juliet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lady_Juliet)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/19 "2001-07-19T18:48:11Z")
Well you could just plaster a nice big sign that says “ASS” on there. Ya know, just in case you forget… ---
**Author:** ![romansperson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/romansperson/32/17100_2.png) [@romansperson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/romansperson)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039/20 "2001-07-19T18:54:15Z")
How about an enlargement of one of those “USDA Prime” meat stickers? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-be-painted-on-my-naked-rear-end/73039.md?page=2)