# What shall we do with a drunken sailor? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 21, 2006, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326 "2006-03-21T19:22:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2006, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/21 "2006-03-21T22:00:07Z")
Put 'imin the Bilge and make him pump it… ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2006, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/22 "2006-03-21T22:16:05Z")
Rum, > [@Scumpup](#): > > Sodomy. …and the lash. The Royal Navy traditions. ---
**Author:** ![Encinitas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2006, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/23 "2006-03-21T22:32:54Z")
Put 'imin the Bilge and make him _drink_ it… ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2006, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/24 "2006-03-21T22:47:21Z")
_Hic_ Treat em wit’ Onner en E’spect _Hic_ Which way to the next Wissky bar? _Hic_ ---
**Author:** ![Stentor\_2.5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc8723/32.png) [@Stentor\_2.5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stentor_2.5)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2006, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/25 "2006-03-21T22:52:10Z")
> [@Casey1505](#): > > Shave his belly with a rusty razor. Well the way I heard it, you’re supposed to shave something with a rusty razor, but I don’t think it’s his belly. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2006, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/26 "2006-03-21T22:56:12Z")
Cut his legs off and call him “Cotton”. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2006, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/27 "2006-03-21T22:58:00Z")
tattoo his ass with a death ray laser ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2006, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/28 "2006-03-21T23:33:10Z")
> [@ShibbOleth](#): > > Roll her\* in the bed and tickle her all over.[/size] Waitaminnit! That’s what you do with a sleepy baby! I’ll thank you to not add that level of freakiness to the kiddie songs! As for the drunken sailor: Give 'im baitbag duty til the moon relieves 'im. ---
**Author:** ![rowrrbazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rowrrbazzle/32/414_2.png) [@rowrrbazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rowrrbazzle)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2006, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/29 "2006-03-21T23:42:15Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > Make him skipper of an Exxon tanker > Ear-lie in the mornin’. **Oily** in the mornin’. ---
**Author:** ![bubastis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d07c76/32.png) [@bubastis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bubastis)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/30 "2006-03-22T00:20:43Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > Sodomy. > [@ADAMA](#): > > So say we all! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![flamingbananas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f4b2a3/32.png) [@flamingbananas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flamingbananas)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/31 "2006-03-22T01:05:03Z")
I had a dance to that song when I was little! And it was ballet! ---
**Author:** ![Bertie\_Wooster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/58f4c7/32.png) [@Bertie\_Wooster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bertie_Wooster)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/32 "2006-03-22T15:54:21Z")
> [@sailorspook](#): > > (The Navy’s answer to the OP? Getting sent Gen Det to a ship. :eek: ) SEND him Gen DET to a SHIP… Naah, that can’t be it. Doesn’t fit the rhythm. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/33 "2006-03-22T16:25:42Z")
Drop him in the Marianas Trench Just once For 20 minutes ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/34 "2006-03-22T16:28:40Z")
> [@Beadalin](#): > > Hoo-ray, up she rises, eh? Have you _seen_ the captain’s daughter? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Ruffian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/71e660/32.png) [@Ruffian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruffian)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/35 "2006-03-22T16:44:06Z")
I’ve had this song in my head for 3 days now. Thank you _so_ much. grumble ---
**Author:** ![UncleRojelio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unclerojelio/32/3160_2.png) [@UncleRojelio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleRojelio)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/36 "2006-03-22T16:49:42Z")
> [@astro](#): > > tattoo his ass with a death ray laser Make that a 1920’s style Death Ray. ---
**Author:** ![Daithi\_Lacha](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/daithi_lacha/32/5430_2.png) [@Daithi\_Lacha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daithi_Lacha)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2006, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326/37 "2006-03-22T18:32:12Z")
Give 'im 'is own show & put 'im on cable! Give 'im 'is own show & put 'im on cable! Give 'im 'is own show & put 'im on cable! Earl-ie in the morning! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-shall-we-do-with-a-drunken-sailor/349326.md?page=1)