# What should I name my new fish? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 3, 2001, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831 "2001-08-03T19:45:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![felicity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aca169/32.png) [@felicity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/felicity)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2001, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/1 "2001-08-03T19:45:04Z")
One of the burning questions of our time: “What should I name my new cube pet?” It is a betta fish. Current names submitted by colleagues: Moby, La Bamba, Poisson, Fins, Sinker, Guido What say the masses? ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2001, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/2 "2001-08-03T19:51:45Z")
[sub]pssst! Wrong forum, dear. Opinion questions should go in IMHO. And welcome to the boards.[/sub] Alpha. Alpha the betta. No? How about Soonah. Soonah the betta. You? You betta. When he dies, he can be You betta not. ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2001, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/3 "2001-08-03T20:07:20Z")
Mo’ You can pretend it’s Hawaiian. ---
**Author:** ![manhattan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manhattan/32/7_2.png) [@manhattan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manhattan)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2001, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/4 "2001-08-03T22:00:40Z")
I concur with Mo. If it’s a blue fish, you can call it mo betta blues. Off to IMHO. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2001, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/5 "2001-08-03T22:26:45Z")
Wanda ---
**Author:** ![Tyklfe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3e96dc/32.png) [@Tyklfe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tyklfe)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2001, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/6 "2001-08-03T22:50:44Z")
babelfish ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2001, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/7 "2001-08-03T22:53:06Z")
Bob. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2001, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/8 "2001-08-03T23:25:07Z")
I think you should call him Much. Much Betta. 🙂 And if he has a brother, Even. **Ender** says you should call it Killer. Or, failing that, Killer Belly (because according to me, fish love receiving belly rubs. They swim up to the tank, turn over, and let you rub to your heart’s content). ---
**Author:** ![obfusciatrist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/4af34b/32.png) [@obfusciatrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/obfusciatrist)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2001, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/9 "2001-08-03T23:31:20Z")
Floater Penis Wrinkle ---
**Author:** ![Tyklfe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3e96dc/32.png) [@Tyklfe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tyklfe)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2001, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/10 "2001-08-03T23:47:47Z")
masta - betta ---
**Author:** ![KarlGrenze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dbc845/32.png) [@KarlGrenze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGrenze)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2001, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/11 "2001-08-03T23:53:52Z")
Darwin the fish? Or the Truth betta? ---
**Author:** ![lightthelight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ce7236/32.png) [@lightthelight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lightthelight)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2001, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/12 "2001-08-03T23:54:32Z")
Vince Gill ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2001, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/13 "2001-08-04T01:19:13Z")
[More suggestions](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=40176) (tip: you get more replies if you offer money :)) ---
**Author:** ![porcupine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ac91a4/32.png) [@porcupine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/porcupine)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2001, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/14 "2001-08-04T01:29:43Z")
Eric ---
**Author:** ![Fern\_Forest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/71c47a/32.png) [@Fern\_Forest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fern_Forest)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2001, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/15 "2001-08-04T01:30:42Z")
Jesus ---
**Author:** ![Fern\_Forest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/71c47a/32.png) [@Fern\_Forest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fern_Forest)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2001, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/16 "2001-08-04T02:12:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jinxie \* > \*\*Jesus \*\* I withdraw this suggestion as it would doubtlessly wear out it’s welcome pretty quickly and instead suggest the two that follow 1. ‘Cold-blooded creature with which I live a lie’ which can be shortened to a simple ‘Coldie’ based on a great Kids in the Hall sketch 2. ‘Icky’ in order to honor its Ictho-American heritage. ---
**Author:** ![Bartman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/779978/32.png) [@Bartman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bartman)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2001, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/17 "2001-08-04T02:27:13Z")
Why would you name a fish? Is it going to come when you call? 😉 My wife and took this reasoning when we bought our cat. He was simply cat. We told people we had named him after the character on Red Dwarf but really it all seemed rather pointless to us. I miss cat \. ---
**Author:** ![Lux\_Fiat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bc79bd/32.png) [@Lux\_Fiat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lux_Fiat)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2001, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/18 "2001-08-04T05:36:54Z")
Caligula. This is the name I always suggest when people ask me what they should name their pets. No one ever acts upon my suggestion. You have the chance to be the first. Exciting, no? ---
**Author:** ![tevya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4491bb/32.png) [@tevya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tevya)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2001, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/19 "2001-08-04T14:38:10Z")
Sushi. Then you get get more fish and name them with the same theme: Sashime, Wasabi, Ginger, etc. ---
**Author:** ![PookahMacPhellimey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pookahmacphellimey/32/3175_2.png) [@PookahMacPhellimey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PookahMacPhellimey)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2001, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831/20 "2001-08-04T16:04:53Z")
I had two fish: Telephone Directory and Spoon. Whatever you do, do NOT name your fish these names. I wanted to be original you see. Just warning you. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-should-i-name-my-new-fish/74831.md?page=2)