# What the FUCK is the Virginia Legislature thinking (gay marriage) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 11, 2004, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683 "2004-05-11T19:51:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![jellyblue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e480ec/32.png) [@jellyblue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jellyblue)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2004, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/41 "2004-05-12T16:50:56Z")
“What the hell is the problem?” Let me see if I can help you understand: If my partner and I, with whom I’ve lived for 6 years (longer than many a straight marriage)out here in sunny So. CA, move to Virginia, I (or she) will have no ownership stakes in any house we buy together. If she gets in an accident, her mom’s gonna have to fly out from OK because I won’t be able to contribute jackshit to informing her medical care, nor would I be entitled to \*visit her \* if she is in intensive care. I can get fired from any job I get there if someone finds out I’m gay and doesn’t like it. If “we” invest, I cannot inherit the dividends of those investments. I do NOT have the civil rights that every other American has in that state. Would you move there if your wife got transferred under those circumstances? If the two of you wouldn’t even be considered a couple if you lived there? If your in-law could just come and throw you out of your house if your wife died, and sell it? I’ll tell ya what, let’s TRADE rights for awhile, and then you can talk to me about how mine aren’t being violated. I have a Ph.D. She served in the Armed Services. We both pay (a LOT) of state and federal taxes. Why is it okay with you that we are second class citizens ANYWHERE in the country? > [@duffer](#): > > Fine, when you show me where your rights were violated, I’ll sign up. YOUR rights. Every job I’ve applied to had the disclaimer that they didn’t discriminate against race, creed, sex, color, sexual orientation, religion, etc. > > I would never say gays aren’t ridiculed. There are almost 300 millioin people in the US. Not all think the same way. But you are allowed to vote. You are allowed to work. You are allowed to invest. Need I go on? > > You have every civil right every other American has. Oh, you don’t have a piece of paper from the state that says you’re married? So what? Seperation of church and state. You can find a myriad of churches that will marry you. What the hell is the problem? Unless you want it recognized by the state so you can cash in on the benefits. Well, shit. In that case move to Minnesota. All MN state employees can have benefits expanded to “partners” Huh? You say one state isn’t enough? And you wonder why conservatives are fighting this? > > Look, we’re not going to agree. I won’t convince you, you won’t convince me. At best I see it as a draw. I’ll respond to you, **gobear** , in this thread for as long as I hit it, but anything else just doesn’t interest me. > > I’d say blow me, but I might enjoy it and really join your side 😃 ---
**Author:** ![spectrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9fc29f/32.png) [@spectrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spectrum)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2004, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/42 "2004-05-12T16:52:20Z")
> [@duffer](#): > > Fine, when you show me where your rights were violated, I’ll sign up. YOUR rights. Every job I’ve applied to had the disclaimer that they didn’t discriminate against race, creed, sex, color, sexual orientation, religion, etc. At one point, my boyfriend and I were thinking of moving to Dallas, TX, after graduation, where he has a job offer. We didn’t want a big commute, and so we were looking at homes in the Park Cities area (smaller homes near the college there). We could not, however, buy a home in the Park Cities, because their zoning laws don’t allow two non-married people to own a house together. This might be illegal, but coming out of college, we certainly have no ability to contest the law. So we’ll stay in Kansas for now, and head somewhere else later. > [@](#): > > You have every civil right every other American has. Oh, you don’t have a piece of paper from the state that says you’re married? Marriage is not a piece of paper. It is a recognition of the validity of one’s relationship by the government. It is ALSO a bundle of rights and priveleges such as automatic, tax-free inheritance, power of attorney for matters medical, and other things you take for granted. Why shouldn’t we have access to those protections? > [@](#): > > I’d say blow me, but I might enjoy it and really join your side 😃 Wow. That is so fucking offensive that there aren’t words for it. I hope you live a short and unhappy life. ---
**Author:** ![jellyblue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e480ec/32.png) [@jellyblue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jellyblue)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2004, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/43 "2004-05-12T16:53:24Z")
Ah. Spectrum. Great minds think, not only alike, but at exactly the same time! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2004, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/44 "2004-05-12T17:29:11Z")
> [@duffer](#): > > So the EEOC is only applied state by state? Damn, we really are more progressive as a “red” state than you Easterners. The EEOC enforces federal law. There is no federal law prohibiting employers from discriminating on the basis of sexual orientation. Moron. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2004, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/45 "2004-05-12T17:42:03Z")
> [@duffer](#): > > So the EEOC is only applied state by state? Damn, we really are more progressive as a “red” state than you Easterners. The [EEOC](http://www.eeoc.gov/abouteeo/overview_laws.html) is Federal in nature. (BTW, the EEOC is a _Commission_, not a law, or even an agency, per se.) The above link summarizes the Federal equal-employment opportunity laws. See anything there about sexual orientation? Neither did I. While the Federal government, _as an employer_, [doesn’t discriminate on the basis of sexual orientation](http://www.opm.gov/er/address2/guide01.asp), it hasn’t mandated that any other employers follow suit. I don’t know where you live, but “you Easterners” suggests that you’re out west somewhere. The Rocky Mountain West (excepting Utah, for obvious reasons) tends to be more libertarian in their conservatism, hence less likely to oppose some legal protections for gays, than the Bible Belt states (mostly Southern and border states) are. ---
**Author:** ![mjolner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6bbea6/32.png) [@mjolner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mjolner)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2004, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/46 "2004-05-12T19:05:44Z")
Has anyone else seen this site? [http://www.virginiaisforhaters.org/](http://www.virginiaisforhaters.org/) I will say that it is sad for folks who represent the state that gave us Washington and Jefferson to pass legistlation that says in effect “All people are equal, but some are more equal than others” Mjolner ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2004, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/47 "2004-05-12T20:07:55Z")
[Southern Senator Guy on the Porch from Hee-Haw] It says here in the Bible that marriage is to be between one man and one woman!!! And if them two don’t see fit to get married, why should I? [/Hee Haw] _ahem_ Yeah, this law sucks. I haven’t done enough towards fighting shit like this, considering how many good things have come my way as part of a deliberately nonmarried hetero couple as a consequence of gay activism. Sorry to hear about this. But I hope the overall trend is still in a better direction, Massachusetts and whatnot. ---
**Author:** ![Spavined\_Gelding](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@Spavined\_Gelding](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spavined_Gelding)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2004, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/48 "2004-05-12T21:18:58Z")
And when was the last time Virginia was seen as a progressive state? This is the state where one county flat unfunded public education rather than comply with Brown v Board of Education. This is the state that nearly sent Oliver North (for the love of all that is holy) to the US Congress. This is the state that harbors Jerry Fallwell. This is a state that has three lane highways. This is a state that builds convenience stores and housing developments on Civil War battlefields. This is a state that has yet to be dragged kicking and screaming out of the 19th century. What on earth did you expect it to do with the same sex marriage and domestic partnership issue? Certainly nothing humane and pragmatic. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/49 "2004-05-13T00:09:27Z")
> [@Spavined Gelding](#): > > This is a state that has three lane highways. The idea being what? That there are twice as many people trying to get out of Virginia as there are trying to get in? ---
**Author:** ![Spavined\_Gelding](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@Spavined\_Gelding](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spavined_Gelding)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/50 "2004-05-13T02:52:29Z")
They may not have them any more. In the old days (ca 1967) the main road from Charlottesville to Staunton was three lanes. The center lane was some sort of a the-devil-take-the-hindmost passing lane – also called the chicken lane. It’s what you do when your don’t want to build a four lane highway because the mink and horse manure set won’t tolerate paying for it. Since then they have built a four lane, probably with federal money. ---
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/51 "2004-05-13T19:51:14Z")
I’m surprised [this website](http://www.virginiaisforhaters.org/) hasn’t been mentioned yet. ---
**Author:** ![plnnr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@plnnr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/plnnr)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/52 "2004-05-13T19:53:47Z")
> [@Spavined Gelding](#): > > And when was the last time Virginia was seen as a progressive state? This is the state where one county flat unfunded public education rather than comply with Brown v Board of Education. This is the state that nearly sent Oliver North (for the love of all that is holy) to the US Congress. This is the state that harbors Jerry Fallwell. This is a state that has three lane highways. This is a state that builds convenience stores and housing developments on Civil War battlefields. This is a state that has yet to be dragged kicking and screaming out of the 19th century. What on earth did you expect it to do with the same sex marriage and domestic partnership issue? Certainly nothing humane and pragmatic. Yeah, but at least we aren’t Iowa. ---
**Author:** ![Triskadecamus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b19c9b/32.png) [@Triskadecamus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Triskadecamus)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/53 "2004-05-13T20:10:48Z")
I’ve lived in Virginia all of my life. I never even considered leaving permanently. This week, this law, and several unrelated things happened. Then my son called and asked if I might consider moving to California in a few years. I am considering it. Pedocracy? Perhaps. Tris ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/54 "2004-05-13T21:35:07Z")
> [@Spavined Gelding](#): > > This is a state that has three lane highways. We still got plenty of 3- and 2-lane highways down here. P-l-e-n-t-y. The only thing progressive about Virginia is the car insurance policy. ---
**Author:** ![Spavined\_Gelding](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@Spavined\_Gelding](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spavined_Gelding)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/55 "2004-05-14T00:51:57Z")
> [@plnnr](#): > > Yeah, but at least we aren’t Iowa. Would you like to explain that comment, friend? :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/56 "2004-05-14T03:03:23Z")
But explain it s-l-o-o-o-w, because, you know, he’s from Iowa. ---
**Author:** ![Otters\_We\_Love](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/3da27b/32.png) [@Otters\_We\_Love](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otters_We_Love)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/57 "2004-05-14T03:20:49Z")
Otto: oooh, good one. That was funny from someone from Wisconsin… 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 8:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/58 "2004-05-14T08:11:48Z")
As I’ve mentioned in similar threads, I lived in Virginia for the first sixteen years of my life. This law does not surprise me. I like to think of Virginia as the eastern love handle of the Bible Belt. This law doesn’t represent a sudden change of opinion. It represents how the average Virginian voter has felt for years. Re Moving To DC DC (unless I missed a historic event) is not a state. The legal situation is bizarre and complex. ---
**Author:** ![flight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbce88/32.png) [@flight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flight)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 10:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/59 "2004-05-14T10:24:33Z")
Shit, I have accepted a job there. Of course, I will be moving from PA, which has a higher concentration of KKK. Sheesh, I need to move out west. ---
**Author:** ![plnnr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@plnnr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/plnnr)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683/60 "2004-05-14T12:25:50Z")
> [@Spavined Gelding](#): > > Would you like to explain that comment, friend? :mad: Sure. To address each of your points: 1. Yes, one county did close its schools rather than integrate. One county out of 99. In the 1950s. 2. Nearly sent Oliver North to Congres. Yes, nearly. He didn’t get elected. 3. Home to Jerry Falwell. Yes, he lives in Lynchburg. We’re also home to AOL headquarters, the largest naval base in the world, Monticello, Mt. Vernon, the State Capital (designed by Thomas Jefferson), and the CIA. 4. 3 lane highways. We also have two lane country roads through beautiful country, and 4 lane highways (I take one to work every day). 5. Convenience stores etc built on Civil War battlefields. I’m not aware of any. Disney tried to build at Bull Run, but were turned down. Walmart tried to build at Ferry Farm, but were turned down. There has been some talk of developing around Chancellorsville, but that hasn’t been decided yet. Additionally, the property is in private hands and here in VA, there’s a very strong belief in individual property rights. If the government would like to obtain the property for preservation, I’m sure the owners would consider the offer. You in Iowa, on the other hand, have…what? Des Moines? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-fuck-is-the-virginia-legislature-thinking-gay-marriage/244683.md?page=4)