# What the hell is my problem? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 13, 2002, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-hell-is-my-problem/142506 "2002-12-13T15:07:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2002, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-hell-is-my-problem/142506/21 "2002-12-14T22:37:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Duck Duck Goose \* > \*\*Rilch: Many old people “shuffle”. Got nothing to do with racism. Don’t automatically assume that just because you see the word used to describe the way an old black woman is walking, that it cloaks some hitherto unsuspected “latent racism”. Chill. > > \*\* Okay…But in that case, is it okay for her to go back to her family and say, “That **ouisey** place is really the Ritz! Those People sure know how to make their money!”? ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2002, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-hell-is-my-problem/142506/22 "2002-12-14T22:56:25Z")
Only if you thought Ouisey was being racist in referring to the shuffle, which I didn’t see. I see someone who is disturbed that a frail elderly woman is working as a servant. > [@](#): > > Every time that woman shuffles in the room, I want to jump up, take whatever she’s got in her hands, and make her sit in my place. I see merely a description of a method of locomotion, not The Mammy Shuffle. Again, you’re reading too much into the OP. Ouisey is concerned that the SO’s family is unwittingly propagating a negative stereotype. It’s possible to be too PC here–the issue wouldn’t have come up if the woman had been white, but because Ouisey is aware of the negative racist stereotype of the Old Black Family Servant, that gives the event more emotional resonance, and so Ouisey is bending over backwards to make sure it _isn’t_ racist. Which IMO it isn’t. It’s possible for the SO’s family to have a Faithful Old Family Retainer whose children they have helped put through school, etc., and have her be black, without it being racist. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2002, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-hell-is-my-problem/142506/23 "2002-12-14T23:03:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Duck Duck Goose \* > \*\*Unless, of course, they require her to dress up like Aunt Jemima and wear a 'do rag and address your SO’s dad as “Massa” and sing Negro spirituals while she’s passing the gefilte fish…Now, that _would_ be racist… \*\* No. _That_ would be comedy. OK, OK, stop throwing stuff! If they _made_ her do it then it would be just plain mean ---
**Author:** ![Suspenderzzz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@Suspenderzzz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Suspenderzzz)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2002, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-hell-is-my-problem/142506/24 "2002-12-16T14:35:09Z")
> [@](#): > > [ > No, stupid, every single statement in that paragraph is an assumption based on the fact that she is old. Period. > Putz. \*\* Okay. Even if it were _just_ in regard to age, not race (let’s assume that for a minute, for the sake of argument, although I don’t buy it), that is equally bad. Subsitute racism for ageism, and you are still assuming a whole lot about a person’s life based on one single fact you know about them. Do you not even _see_ how small-minded that is? People always have assumptions about others based on knowing one fact about them: “Fact A applies to this person, so it can be safely deduced that Fact B, C, D, and probably E must be true as well.” Bull. Fucking. Shit. As a person who does not now, nor never has, easily fit into any one easily-defined category (something I consider an asset; don’t get me wrong), I have encountered similar types of bullshit prejudices all my life. You are talking to the master. And, btw, tell this kind of bullshit to the 80’ish, feisty, fiercely indedpendent black lady who lives in my building. She would kick your ass all the way to hell and back. Maybe you should worry less about Michael Jackson, and get out more. In the real world most people are more complicated than you would deduce by knowing one or two surface facts about them. ---
**Author:** ![ouisey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9fc29f/32.png) [@ouisey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouisey)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2002, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-hell-is-my-problem/142506/25 "2002-12-16T15:13:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Duck Duck Goose \* > \*\*… but because Ouisey is aware of the negative racist stereotype of the Old Black Family Servant, that gives the event more emotional resonance, and so Ouisey is bending over backwards to make sure it _isn’t_ racist. > > Which IMO it isn’t. It’s possible for the SO’s family to have a Faithful Old Family Retainer whose children they have helped put through school, etc., and have her be black, without it being racist. \*\* That’s exactly it, **DDG**. Thanks! I help the woman do the dishes and as we chat, I never get the vibe that she’s not perfectly content to do what she does. I think, too, she’s happy to be included in the family this way. A holiday meal isn’t a holiday meal without her dish of pickled peppers on the table. I know its not racist, but it feels racist to have her serve me. ---
**Author:** ![Aglet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/aca169/32.png) [@Aglet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aglet)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-hell-is-my-problem/142506/26 "2002-12-20T18:14:47Z")
Posted by **ouisey** : > [@](#): > > I help the woman do the dishes and as we chat, I never get the vibe that she’s not perfectly content to do what she does. I think, too, she’s happy to be included in the family this way. So what is it about her seeming happy and content that bothers you? The part about you wanting to make her sit in your place (from the OP) really bothers me. Posted by **ouisey** : > [@](#): > > I know its not racist, but it feels racist to have her serve me. It may be a wonderful nonracist thing that you help her do the dishes and chat with her, but if it feels racist to have her serve you, then it is. I have to agree with **Suspenderzzz** > [@](#): > > It is this kind of latent racism, the kind that is veiled as compassion that I find the most frightening. I do detect a possible trace of that. I am heartened by the fact that it is troubling to you because it troubles you. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-the-hell-is-my-problem/142506.md?page=1)