# What things can a person say to you to make you lose respect instantly? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 6, 2003, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755 "2003-11-06T19:54:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Colinmarshall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/cc9497/32.png) [@Colinmarshall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colinmarshall)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/1 "2003-11-06T19:54:15Z")
We’ve all got 'em. Certain views, phrases or opinions that we can’t hear out of other people without losing all respect for them damn near instantly. What are your personal insta-respect-drainers? Mine: - Any reference to the evils of “the corporate state” - “Wouldn’t be great to live in a world without money?” - “You haven’t LIVED until you’ve been to Europe.” - “I’m really more of a dog person.” (Rigidly labeling self as a \_\_\_\_ - person.) - “Live simply so that others may live,” or, related, “If everyone lived like YOU, we’d need 2.3 Earths.” - “There’s still a need for feminism in 2003.” - “The reason there’s so much poverty is that the minimum wage is too low.” - “Man, the Dave Matthews Band rocks!” ---
**Author:** ![Snuggles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@Snuggles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snuggles)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/2 "2003-11-06T20:03:08Z")
- Excessive use of swear words, I cannot stand that - Any use of racials slurs or other related comments about race/culture/ etc. - Any harsh statements about characteristics people have no control over. (Example, this one girl was talking about a guy in a wheel chair who is disabled --has no legs-- and says “every time I see that guy I can’t help but laugh at him”. My jaw fell to the floor. SO RUDE!) - If someone says anything about trends like, “hey snuggles, why aren’t you wearing \_\_\_\_ type of jeans (etc.) They are the “in” thing don’t you know?” GOD I can’t stand that, let me wear what I like, and you do the same. - Overly argumentative people. Why can’t these people have a discussion without forcing their opinion down my throat? Why can’t they be wrong? Those are examples that come to mind. I am sure there are others. ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/3 "2003-11-06T20:20:55Z")
Wow \*_Colin_! Anyone who writes an OP like that and has a Sig like this: > [@](#): > > You’re not J. Alfred Prufrock. You’re not Holden Caulfield. You’re not Sal Paradise. You’re just fat - would seem to have issues of their own. > [@](#): > > There’s still a need for feminism in 2003 > [@](#): > > Man, the Dave Matthews Band rocks Something against Feminism **Colin**? Hmmmm? And whats wrong with the Dave Matthews Band? Are you Mad at something Dave did in particular, or do you just have a general dislike for those who like Dave Matthews…? ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/4 "2003-11-06T20:23:55Z")
All that and my coding get’s all hemmed up :shruggs: ---
**Author:** ![UES\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/76d3ee/32.png) [@UES\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UES_Guy)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/5 "2003-11-06T20:27:43Z")
“I can lose respect for someone instantly based on a random remark about their personal preferences or beliefs.” That’d do it for me. ---
**Author:** ![Omnipresent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8c91f0/32.png) [@Omnipresent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omnipresent)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/6 "2003-11-06T20:36:29Z")
“Not for nuttin’” Huh? ---
**Author:** ![Colinmarshall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/cc9497/32.png) [@Colinmarshall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colinmarshall)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/7 "2003-11-06T20:37:09Z")
As the characters in Nick Hornby’s _High Fidelity_ said… “How can stating a preference be wrong?” “If it’s the _wrong preference!_” ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/8 "2003-11-06T20:38:41Z")
Ditto on the racial slurs. Unfortunately, members of my own family do this. Liking pro wrestling. Hell, just wearing a shirt that says “NWO” on it. Thinking their political views are the only “right” opinions to have, and the opposition is either Godless, stupid treehuggers, or Nazis. ---
**Author:** ![Llama\_Llogophile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@Llama\_Llogophile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Llama_Llogophile)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/9 "2003-11-06T20:42:34Z")
“What’s your sign?” "Can I ‘ax’ you a question? “To get the answer you times it by three…” ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/10 "2003-11-06T21:46:41Z")
“Oh, I never read.” “Did you hear about J-Lo?”(or whatever moronic celebrity is hot) “It’s all good!” WTF does that _mean?_ It makes me want to heap bad experiences on their heads until they admit that all is truly not that great. ---
**Author:** ![Ana\_Byrd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Ana\_Byrd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ana_Byrd)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/11 "2003-11-06T21:47:49Z")
Actual conversation, three times that I can recall off the top of my head: “Do you have a boyfriend?” “Never have.” “Aahm!.. are you, um, you know?” A hamster? No. Lesbian? No, I’m not that either. Teenage girls are weird like that. Another annoying one is when I bring up a serious issue and try to get a discussion going, and they give an answer like “Because it’s, like, wrong? I mean, you know, it just sucks.” Not entirely sure how to put it; whenever I try that kind of babble myself it comes out as 1337speak (punctuated by LOLs rather than actual giggles). ---
**Author:** ![Colinmarshall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/cc9497/32.png) [@Colinmarshall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colinmarshall)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/12 "2003-11-06T21:48:35Z")
“Times” instead of “multiply.” Talk about making my skin crawl… ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/13 "2003-11-06T22:21:44Z")
Any ethnic joke, or ethnic disparity. I was at a party last year (when Kordell Stewart was still part of the Steelers) and a guy actually said that Kordell would never go to the Super Bowel because he was the wrong color. I literally turned my back on him. A guy here at work loves to tell polish jokes. I have no respect for him. ---
**Author:** ![Hyperelastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Hyperelastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hyperelastic)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/14 "2003-11-06T22:24:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Khadaji \* > \*\*never go to the Super Bowel \*\* Words to live by 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Hyperelastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Hyperelastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hyperelastic)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/15 "2003-11-06T22:27:31Z")
Is the Super Bowel anything like the [Colossal Colon](http://www.preventcancer.org/colossalcolon/)? Sorry, I’m trying to get as much mileage out of this as I can. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2003, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/16 "2003-11-06T22:40:57Z")
“There’s _no_ need for feminism in 2003.” :rolleyes: Or on a more serious note: “Hey, check out the tits on that one.” ---
**Author:** ![cajela](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@cajela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cajela)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2003, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/17 "2003-11-07T00:35:07Z")
With you all the way on that one **cervaise**. Hey, have you seen [this photo](http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2003/11/images/20031105-1_p35410-21-515h.html) ? Which gender is regulating which other one? **Dung Beetle** , it doesn’t have to mean EVERYTHING is good (but yes, I would worry if someone used it with such a Candide act.) Just the choices in the context of the conversation. As in “Would you like a Thai curry or Indian one?”, “i dunno, whatever you feel like, it’s all good.” It’s just a colloquialism. Like “whatever” but a tad more positive. ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2003, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/18 "2003-11-07T01:28:49Z")
Suggesting a mutual act of larceny. Reporting their use of physical violence to control an SO (common to all genders). ---
**Author:** ![Becky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c4cdca/32.png) [@Becky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2003, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/19 "2003-11-07T02:03:56Z")
From my first date with my first potential boyfriend at college … he said “If a married man has an extramarital affair, it’s always his wife’s fault. Obviously, she’s doing something wrong to cause him to want to have an affair … I think men should be allowed to sleep with anyone they want to, whether they’re married or not.” Oddly, we didn’t see each other much at all after that date. A gem from my SO’s mother’s husband: “What every woman needs is a good man to tie her down and direct her in life.” You could have left ice cream on the dinner table after that without fear of it melting. Why don’t people just **think** before speaking? Yeesh! ---
**Author:** ![StanDup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e5b9ba/32.png) [@StanDup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StanDup)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2003, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755/20 "2003-11-07T02:32:06Z")
“I hate blacks.” "I hate (insert other nationalities here) That’s it. Period, end of story, open and shut case. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-things-can-a-person-say-to-you-to-make-you-lose-respect-instantly/211755.md?page=2)