# What this place reminds me of **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 22, 2013, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160 "2013-07-22T03:56:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2013, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/101 "2013-07-23T04:29:26Z")
> [@dropzone](#): > > I have never been to Massachusetts so I don’t know. I dislike South Florida irrationally, but the people seem OK. However, if I had a quarter for every time a foreigner has told me how surprisingly friendly the people of Chicago are, I’d have several dollars, but they may have expected to be machine gunned by Al Capone. Hell, even the muggers will apologize as they run away with your phone and cash. ---
**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2013, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/102 "2013-07-23T06:15:22Z")
> [@get\_lives](#): > > No, I’m not “raising a point”. I’m trying to understand what it’s like to not give a good goddamn whether or not you are persuading/convincing others, or whether or not you are eroding your ability to do so by being abusive. Within the context of the Pit, no I don’t care whether I’m convincing anyone of anything. That’s not what it’s for. But if you look, I don’t exclusively post in the pit, and I don’t know anyone that does. In terms of what it’s like, I guess the answer is…it’s cripplingly lonely. I sit here, with just the light of my monitor to illuminate my ramen noodles, wearing the same clothes I’ve had on for weeks, trying to criticize great guys like **get lives**. When, deep down, I know he’s living the dream. I know he’s better than us and I appreciate that he has taken the time to make us aware of it. ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Gay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3ab097/32.png) [@Enola\_Gay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Gay)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2013, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/103 "2013-07-23T14:04:29Z")
> [@get\_lives](#): > > This is an interesting point, the assumption that the way people behave in the Pit is somehow therapeutic. However…aren’t you just ruining someone else’s day, who then kicks the dog, smacks the kid, yells at their spouse, etc.? I’m not saying the venting is valueless, but it doesn’t look like it’s solving much in a larger sense, does it? This is an excellent point, because after the verbal abuse I suffered from those insensitive bastards, **kayaker** & **Sylmar** , you know what I went and did? I immediately logged off the SDMB, then kicked my dog, smacked my kids around, then punched my husband in the balls. BUT (and this is the value, **get lives** , that you seem unable to appreciate), I then _turned it into a positive._ Do I feel guilty for inflicting pain on my dog & family? Not for a second! My conscience is clear as a whistle, because all that was \*\*kayaker \*\*& \*\*Sylmar’\*\*s fault for ruining my day. So you see how it works? I get to get my angries out on my pets and family & I feel NO guilt whatsoever! Win/win. ---
**Author:** ![Truman\_Burbank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@Truman\_Burbank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Truman_Burbank)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2013, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/104 "2013-07-23T14:09:46Z")
> [@slm2955](#): > > …You would know this because…?:rolleyes: Lack of anything much to offer? This thread is my cite. 🙂 Drive to convince others being a reflection of insecurity? Many years of observation of the human condition (I’m a therapist, FWIW). People who are secure in themselves don’t feel anxiety when others believe differently. People who are insecure and anxious can’t tolerate well the inner conflict (dissonance) of others holding opposing viewpoints, so they try to reduce the dissonance by swaying others to their own belief system (or by changing their beliefs to fit those around them, but that is a different lecture in social Psychology). The OP describes it as a “compulsion”, which is an anxiety symptom. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2013, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/105 "2013-07-23T14:13:08Z")
> [@Enola\_Gay](#): > > This is an excellent point, because after the verbal abuse I suffered from those insensitive bastards, **kayaker** & **Sylmar** , you know what I went and did? I immediately logged off the SDMB, then kicked my dog, smacked my kids around, then punched my husband in the balls. Dammit, I swore I wouldn’t cry. ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2013, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/106 "2013-07-23T14:14:01Z")
I may be out of line here, but I would believe that an attempt to uplift us poor benighted monkeys should precede the haranguing. I have my doubts about the sincerity of a person who immediately goes to complaints. ---
**Author:** ![Truman\_Burbank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@Truman\_Burbank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Truman_Burbank)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2013, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/107 "2013-07-23T14:24:29Z")
“Show some regard for the depth of this tendency, dude.” You came in here to tell **me** (generically) that I don’t have a life? Then I’m supposed to show regard for **your** feelings? Yeah, I guess that does sound like a five year old. Five year olds, and their analogs, should definitely not be in a Pit. ---
**Author:** ![Crotalus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crotalus/32/41_2.png) [@Crotalus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crotalus)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2013, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/108 "2013-07-23T15:18:10Z")
> [@DrFidelius](#): > > I may be out of line here, but I would believe that an attempt to uplift us poor benighted monkeys should precede the haranguing. I have my doubts about the sincerity of a person who immediately goes to **complaints**. Which I believe is down the hall. [QUOTE=silenus] …pusillanimous peckerwood. [/QUOTE] Outstanding! ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2013, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/109 "2013-07-23T15:20:52Z")
> [@Crotalus](#): > > Which I believe is down the hall. > > Outstanding! Oh, I’m sorry. I was looking for an Argument. ---
**Author:** ![get\_lives](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecb155/32.png) [@get\_lives](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/get_lives)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2013, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/110 "2013-07-24T02:25:28Z")
> [@Truman\_Burbank](#): > > “Show some regard for the depth of this tendency, dude.” > > You came in here to tell **me** (generically) that I don’t have a life? Then I’m supposed to show regard for **your** feelings? Yeah, I guess that does sound like a five year old. > Five year olds, and their analogs, should definitely not be in a Pit. Well, what’s the appropriate thing to say to an educated adult professional with an advanced degree that gets into swearing/insult matches regularly on an internet forum? Because that’s mystifying. That’s for teenage boys on 4 chan, not…their fathers and mothers. ROFL ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2013, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/111 "2013-07-24T02:41:08Z")
> [@get\_lives](#): > > ROFL Get up, you’re embarrassing yourself.:rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![R3d\_Anonymous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/aeb1de/32.png) [@R3d\_Anonymous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/R3d_Anonymous)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2013, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/112 "2013-07-24T02:49:58Z")
> [@get\_lives](#): > > That doesn’t help me much as far as understanding people who don’t have such a deep-seated need to persuade/convince as I do. Are there any other, perhaps more helpful, insights that you can offer? Try IMHO or MPSIMS. That is where I usually hang out if I just want to post in peace. ---
**Author:** ![Girlundone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/919ad9/32.png) [@Girlundone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girlundone)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2013, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/113 "2013-07-24T03:01:14Z")
[QUOTE=get lives] Are there any other, perhaps more helpful, insights that you can offer? [/QUOTE] I’m new here so I don’t know how valuable my insights might be, but maybe grow some nads? Hope this helps. Xo ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2013, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/114 "2013-07-24T03:21:50Z")
New, but already grokking. Well done, **Girlundone**. ---
**Author:** ![get\_lives](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecb155/32.png) [@get\_lives](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/get_lives)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2013, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/115 "2013-07-24T03:23:50Z")
See, here’s the thing. I don’t mind unleashing a few Yo Mama jokes, etc., but I’m always afraid someone will be offended. IRL I can read my audience’s body language, etc., but that’s obviously not true here. Plus, it’s hard to know who’s reading without posting. ---
**Author:** ![Girlundone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/919ad9/32.png) [@Girlundone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girlundone)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2013, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/116 "2013-07-24T03:40:09Z")
[QUOTE=get lives] I don’t mind unleashing a few Yo Mama jokes, etc., but I’m always afraid someone will be offended [/QUOTE] The point of Yo Mama jokes is to offend. I did have to explain to my young sons that you cannot dis your biological sibling with a Yo Mama joke though. Anyway I can see from your last post that you did not take my advice. ---
**Author:** ![get\_lives](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecb155/32.png) [@get\_lives](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/get_lives)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2013, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/117 "2013-07-24T04:10:08Z")
> [@Girlundone](#): > > The point of Yo Mama jokes is to offend. I did have to explain to my young sons that you cannot dis your biological sibling with a Yo Mama joke though. > > Anyway I can see from your last post that you did not take my advice. How would you feel about your sons behaving like some of the more insulting members here, if they grow up and have otherwise-productive lives? ---
**Author:** ![Truman\_Burbank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@Truman\_Burbank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Truman_Burbank)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2013, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/118 "2013-07-24T04:13:55Z")
Pal, you keep walking face-first into the wall, and blaming the wall. Don’t like it here, there’s an obvious answer. What would you say to your son, if they just didn’t learn their lesson and kept making appointments at the Argument Clinic for further abuse? ---
**Author:** ![Truman\_Burbank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@Truman\_Burbank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Truman_Burbank)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2013, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/119 "2013-07-24T04:19:39Z")
> [@get\_lives](#): > > Well, what’s the appropriate thing to say to an educated adult professional with an advanced degree that gets into swearing/insult matches regularly on an internet forum? > > Because that’s mystifying. That’s for teenage boys on 4 chan, not…their fathers and mothers. ROFL Also, just for the record, in case the above was directed at me personally, I have not sworn **at all** in this thread, don’t **regularly** insult other posters (although I will make an exception, obviously). Your **OP** is an insult, and you started with it, so where does the ‘holier than thou’ attitude have any basis in fact? And is it true that you used to post here under another name and got banned? It was alleged earlier in the thread, and you kinda didn’t respond to that, somehow. Insults can be very artful when done well, and there are some masters here. I enjoy a good pitting, now and again. ---
**Author:** ![get\_lives](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecb155/32.png) [@get\_lives](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/get_lives)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2013, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160/120 "2013-07-24T04:23:34Z")
> [@Truman\_Burbank](#): > > Also, just for the record, in case the above was directed at me personally, I have not sworn **at all** in this thread, don’t **regularly** insult other posters (although I will make an exception, obviously). Your **OP** is an insult, and you started with it, so where does the ‘holier than thou’ attitude have any basis in fact? And is it true that you used to post here under another name and got banned? It was alleged earlier in the thread, and you kinda didn’t respond to that, somehow. Insults can be very artful when done well, and there are some masters here. I enjoy a good pitting, now and again. Actually, I’d have to do a search to know your posting style, so no, it wasn’t directed at you. It can be, though. try harder! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-this-place-reminds-me-of/664160.md?page=7)