# What time should a 15 year old be out of bed? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 24, 2020, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202 "2020-03-24T22:33:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2020, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/121 "2020-03-27T04:27:59Z")
> [@Great\_Antibob](#): > > Sure, then the complaint should be about the chores, not the sleep schedule. Preaching to the choir here. 100% agree. ---
**Author:** ![MarvinKitFox](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ba0ec/32.png) [@MarvinKitFox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MarvinKitFox)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2020, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/122 "2020-03-27T06:07:03Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > It is now 11:15 am, and she is refusing to get out of bed, This is meaningless without context. \*What time did she go to bed? I.e. how many hours of sleep. If more than 10 hours or so, you have a valid complaint. If not, you are the problem. \*is there any reason for her to get out of bed, other than to satisfy your sensibilities? Does she need to go to school, work, are there assigned chores that are undone etc? it there are, she is the problem. If not, you are the problem. ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2020, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/123 "2020-03-27T07:37:26Z")
well 7:45 PM…piano not practised and she’s in bed keeping warm with computer. told you all had reamed me over being mean…but that she was not keeping up her end of bargain. so a got a sullen piano practise. ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2020, 7:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/124 "2020-03-27T07:41:41Z")
and by the way…no medication and we have not curtains. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2020, 10:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/125 "2020-03-27T10:11:09Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > This is the real crux of the issue - > I don’t think that being on social media all night and then sleeping all day on a regular / ongoing basis is a healthy lifestyle. If you want the social media cut off after a certain point then take away her phone. Or take her computer out of her room. You’re the parent, you can impose rules. > [@bengangmo](#): > > I see it as part of being a parent to teach healthy habits, > Nothing I’ve ever seen allows me to associate this pattern of behaviour as being healthy. I am inherently a night owl. Left to myself I go to bed around 2 am or so and sleep until 10 or 11 am. On the other hand, my current job often demands I WAKE UP at 2 am to get to work on time, which I do. Maintaining that schedule requires enormous self-discipline and is never really comfortable for me. It is contributing to sleep disturbances which over the past few years has sometimes required medication. The point being that what she is doing now MIGHT, in fact, be her normal. Now, being the parent you can force her to keep a “morning lark” schedule but that doesn’t mean she’s going to “learn” to like something that is at odds with her natural rhythms. If it short changes her sleep then in fact your efforts could be unhealthy for her. But I’m not there so I can’t tell what is your personal bias and what is her being a rebellious teenager. Because yes, some of this could be teen rebellion. Which is annoying but normal for teens, and if sleeping all day is the way she is rebelling, well, things could be a lot worse. > [@bengangmo](#): > > this young lady is a “star” - she’s very consistently at the top of her year group in the biggest school in our region. In her last standardised test she was in the top 10% of the country. Getting her schoolwork done is not the metric I want to see her measured by. > I have real issues with “coasting”, > I have real issues with things becoming habit that are not things we want to cultivate. And one of these is living the lifestyle of people that I don’t want to emulate Geez, this reminds me of arguments my husband used to have with his mother. He was another one of the night owls. Given a choice, he’d always choose the night shift. When he worked freelance from home he would start work around 8 pm work until 4 or 5 am. He’d go to bed around 7 am. He’d sleep until 3 pm. That was his normal. He was very productive, gaining two patents and several copyrighted works over his lifetime. When he worked as a performer being a night owl was an asset. Yet his mother considered him lazy because she’d call at 10 am and couldn’t figure out why he was always asleep. He was asleep because he didn’t get to bed until 7 am because he was working until 5 am. When a job required that he get up early he did so - at one point he was getting up at 3 am to go to a job to keep a roof over both our heads. My point being that his inclination to stay up until dawn was NOT a sign of laziness or debauchery, it was what felt best. But he _could_ change his schedule when needed, just as when a morning lark is stuck working 2nd shift or even overnights. So… when school is in session and life is normal does she properly get up, get ready, and get to school on time? If the answer is yes then _stop worrying_. Right now nothing is normal. She might be having trouble getting to sleep - I sure as hell do these days. If that is the case then help her without berating her. Put a curfew on social media/screen time. If she wants to sit up after that time she can read a treebook or knit or whatever. Cut back on caffeine if that’s part of the issue. If the problem is that she’s depressed or anxious because of what’s going on…well, it’s a strain on all of us. If her staying up and sleeping in late is a means of coping it’s not the worst means of doing so. Tell her that if she’s going to live in a different time zone as the rest of the house inform her that the ONLY concession to that will be allowing her to keep her door closed - the rest of the household is under no obligation to tip-toe around. Back in my teen years that would not be an obstacle to my sleeping - heck, I was known for falling asleep during _bagpipe band_ practices (damn, I miss being able to sleep like that!). If she needs the sleep she’ll sleep. If she’s unhappy - well, the rest of the household is not required to accommodate her living out of synch. Assuming you’re as cooped up as the rest of the planet right now, is this really the hill you want to have a battle on? Do her chores _have to_ be done early, or is that YOUR habit? Are there things to do at night that she can be given? If she’s not cooking/cleaning up for breakfast can she be assigned to clean up after dinner? You can impose the condition that if she wants her own private time zone then she is required to contribute an adult portion of household maintenance. Yeah, make that the deal - choosing your own schedule is an adult thing. If she wants that privilege then she must also assume adult responsibility - dinner clean up, or doing the laundry for everyone, or something that significantly contributes to the household that relieves you of labor in return for her making that choice. You are correct - being a night owl is no excuse for laziness or evasion of responsibility, so if she wants that time zone she has to demonstrate she is NOT those things. If she’s contributing to the household, getting her homework done, and otherwise demonstrating energy and responsibility despite living in a different time zone would that alleviate your worry? If you’ve been a morning lark all your life and was raised that rising early was a virtue I can understand your struggle with that. However, there are a LOT of us living the night shift who are productive, wholesome adults. It’s not incompatible with being a productive and even ambitious citizen, even if it’s not your personal normal. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2020, 10:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/126 "2020-03-27T10:19:15Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > All of the arguments (aside from being a night owl) here so far have amounted to “let her do what she wants” No, it’s “let her sleep IF her responsibilities are being fulfilled”. You seem to be completely missing the second half of that. > [@bengangmo](#): > > Nobody has suggested that a up to 11 or more hours of sleep a night is healthy, or that being on a schedule of sleeping at 2 or 3 am is healthy or desirable How do you know she’s sleeping 11 or more hours? Just because she’s in her bedroom, or in her bed, doesn’t mean she’s _asleep_. > [@bengangmo](#): > > She’s welcome to do whatever she likes with her time - go to sleep at time that suits her, I’m ok with that. She’s also welcome to spend her time in the evenings doing whatever she wants. > > My quid pro quo is that I expect her up in the mornings, being helpful and productive The second part contradicts the first - unless you think forcing someone to be sleep deprived is healthy or desirable. So, let’s say… she stays up until 4 am and gets up at 7 am as you want her to do, to help out. Then mid-afternoon, exhausted, she falls asleep - are you going to come back complaining she’s napping every afternoon? What you very clearly want is for her to conform to your schedule and you keep coming up with excuses as to why what you want is preferable to all other possibilities. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2020, 10:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/127 "2020-03-27T10:27:10Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > b) sleeping till noon is not healthy On what basis? If a person doesn’t fall asleep until 4 or 5 am yes, in fact sleeping til noon IS healthy. > [@bengangmo](#): > > If I were home, I’d be getting her out of bed, I’m not home, I’m at work. > have sent a whole bunch of stuff that too much sleep is bad of health, and that having irregular sleep patterns is bad also Except you’ve already said you don’t know how much she actually is or isn’t sleeping, and if a person is _regularly_ up until 4 am and sleeping until noon _that is in fact a regular sleep pattern_. It’s just not your pattern. > [@bengangmo](#): > > I am hoping to strengthen that by tapping on the collective wisdom of the dope > Instead I’m getting “teens will be teens” (boys will be boys?) > Just accepting that teens are supposed to be rebellious and sleep till noon is not something I feel comfortable with. No one is saying “just accept this”. We are giving you a list of things to look for, conditions to impose, and questions to ask. What you are NOT getting is automatic validation that you are 100% correct in all ways. > [@bengangmo](#): > > I’ve always believed that people will live up to or down to your expectations - my expectation is that people are out of bed, happy and productive during the day - not sleeping till noon like the proverbial moocher who can’t hold a job First, you can’t force someone to be happy. You can force your daughter to get up at an arbitrary time, you can NOT force her to be happy about it. Second - you have just insulted absolutely everyone who busts their ass on the night shift to keep the world working while you sleep. Thanks for the slam. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2020, 10:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/128 "2020-03-27T10:36:09Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > Oh gawd NO! > For most things I’m pretty relaxed > However it does bug me when, after chatting on the phone or swapping messages till 2 or 3 am (I could hear her talking on the phone at 4am the other day) I then hear complaints of being too tired to get out of bed. THEN TAKE AWAY HER PHONE! Holy crap - you’re the adult here. One more time: it is entirely valid to impose a rule of "no on-line/phone time past X time at night). At which point she has to surrender her phone to you or the other parent who retains custody until X condition (time, completed chore, whatever) ensues. If the phone is the problem then deal with it. If she then starts sleeping on a schedule more compatible with your own then great. If she is STILL lying awake until 3 am then it’s something else. Would you let her wander around a mall at 2 am? _Of course not_. Then don’t let her “wander around” on the phone or on line at 2 am. ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2020, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/129 "2020-03-27T15:28:50Z")
A few years back I read an article about an anthropologist who’d spent several months living with one of the last hunter-gatherer tribes on New Guinea. He noticed, just like ‘civilized’ people, the teens went to sleep late and got up late while the oldsters slept early and got up early with little kids and young adults somewhere in between. As a consequence the span where _no one_ was awake was less than two hours. He hypothesized it was a holdover from the bad old days where a leopard might sneak up on them or something while everyone was asleep. ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2020, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/130 "2020-03-27T16:07:16Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > For a start - what am I supposed to say to the younger sister? When she wants to go to bed late and then sleep late. > Next up - it affects her mother, having one of the rooms closed > It affects me - during the sunshine hours having someone asleep in a darkened room affects how I feel. > Unless there is a very good reason (nightshift or sickness) I very much associate this sort of sleep pattern with unproductive habits as well as slovenliness - it’s not something that I will allow to be propagated. Then why are you asking for opinions, if you have no intention of considering those that don’t agree with yours? ---
**Author:** ![markdash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba8739/32.png) [@markdash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markdash)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2020, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/131 "2020-03-27T17:31:56Z")
Sleeping until 11:15 am?!? What is this, amateur hour? ---
**Author:** ![Moriarty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moriarty/32/49_2.png) [@Moriarty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moriarty)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2020, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/132 "2020-03-27T20:05:38Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > well 7:45 PM…piano not practised and she’s in bed keeping warm with computer. > told you all had reamed me over being mean…but that she was not keeping up her end of bargain. > so a got a sullen piano practise. You sound like a demanding parent who doesn’t recognize how high achieving your child is. Your behavior is probably ripe for rebellion. … When I was a teen, my mom liked to joke that I awoke at “the crack of noon”. I wasn’t exactly a night owl, I just liked to sleep. And even if I went to bed at 11 or 11:30, it felt good to wake up in the morning and then roll over for another hour or so. I still like to sleep. But these days, at 42, I’m in bed by 10 and wake by 6:30 every day - on weekends I lounge around in bed for an hour or so, and maybe relish a weekend nap when I can find the time. So, no, this is not some lifelong affliction. This is a teenager - a hard working, probably sleep deprived one - enjoying some much earned R&R. (I mean, as others have said, if school started up and she wasn’t getting ready on time, or she was missing her part time job because she overslept, then it’s a problem. Not fulfilling some arbitrary to-do list for the sake of appearing busy - sadly, an affliction at many adult jobs - is hardly worth a concern). ---
**Author:** ![puddleglum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puddleglum/32/137_2.png) [@puddleglum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puddleglum)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2020, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/133 "2020-03-27T22:01:06Z")
During the teen years the circadian rhythm significantly changes. It moves so that staying up later and getting up later is what happens. This change can be as much as two hours. If she is having a problem going to sleep at night or can not get enough sleep, circadian rhythms can be adjusted. Melatonin is a mild hypnotic but it usually does a great job at changing circadian patterns. The most effective dose is about one third to one tenth the usual dose so it would be a good idea to break the tablets up for maximum effectiveness. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/134 "2020-03-28T01:55:02Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > I’ve never slept “well”, and I’ve always been a morning person And some of us are night owls. From what I gather, it’s just one of those things that’s ingrained, and you really can’t change it. > [@Aspidistra](#): > > This is all reminding me of the continual tussles I used to have with my mother about HER particular bugbear which was - People Study Effectively When They Sit At Desks! People Cannot Study Effectively In Places Other Than Desks! (god, this is triggering me just to type this) We had a whole ‘thing’ for years in high school where I’d have all my books and notes out in a huge spread all over my bed, all comfy and wrapped up, and then she’d come in and make me Sit At My Desk Because That’s Where You’ll Do Effective Study! Of course as soon as I left home to go to Uni I was back to bedspreading, and I was perfectly successful like that, it was all just her assuming that because _she_ did things one way, that made it the right thing to do and \*everyone \*should do it that way. That was like my mother, who at first FORBID me to listen to music while I did my homework, or studied. I found it helped me concentrate much better, because I could tune everything else out, but she was convinced it would distract me. It took me forever to persuade her otherwise. > [@UltraVires](#): > > I understand the OP. I have a 16 year old. My thought is that it is my idea to teach a child the “right” way to do things. Early to bed, early to rise. Eat healthy meals, no snacking between meals, and limit food intake at night. Get exercise and shower and dress every day (no sitting around in PJs even if it is a day off). > > When she gets older at least she will have learned the basics from me. When she becomes an adult if she wants to party all night and sleep all day and can still keep a job, then that is her life to live. My job now is to instill good habits in her that she can fall back on later in life if she chooses. Please tell me your 16 year old doesn’t have a BED TIME? ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/135 "2020-03-28T02:58:07Z")
> [@DesertDog](#): > > A few years back I read an article about an anthropologist who’d spent several months living with one of the last hunter-gatherer tribes on New Guinea. He noticed, just like ‘civilized’ people, the teens went to sleep late and got up late while the oldsters slept early and got up early with little kids and young adults somewhere in between. > > As a consequence the span where _no one_ was awake was less than two hours. He hypothesized it was a holdover from the bad old days where a leopard might sneak up on them or something while everyone was asleep. I’ve wondered for some time whether this might not be the explanation for different people having different sleep patterns. During most of human evolution it must have been an advantage to always have somebody awake – whether to watch out for tigers or just to keep the fire going. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/136 "2020-03-28T06:11:00Z")
> [@Powers](#): > > I dunno, I can imagine it’s annoying to have one member of the household missing from morning activities. It’s good for families to eat together, for instance. That doesn’t just mean dinner. ? boomer here - the only meal that we all ate together was the evening meal - neither my brother nor I went to the same school, so we rarely were around at the same time other than for dinner … I don’t think our family suffered particularly much. > [@bengangmo](#): > > we have not curtains. SO, you have peeping toms? > [@Broomstick](#): > > Second - you have just insulted absolutely everyone who busts their ass on the night shift to keep the world working while you sleep. Thanks for the slam. :rolleyes: Speaking as someone who worked nights doing security and keeping the world [or those who were secured by us] safe, gee, thanks for being dismissed for my ‘bohemian’ schedule. I am in agreement wth Broomstick - there are tons of jobs that require a second or third shift life … my husband just left a job working a funky half second half third shift making crucial parts for the defense industry … after spending 20 years in the military where one of the not optional scheduals was called port and starboard - 12 hour shifts, day in and day out sometimes for months at a time. WHen deployed on his boat, they had an 18 hour day - 6 hours on watch, 6 hours off watch, 6 hours ‘personal time’ [eat, sleep, whatever] so the ‘day’ and ‘night’ sort of precessed around the clock. ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 7:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/137 "2020-03-28T07:16:15Z")
> [@bengamo post #1](#): > > - Having curtains closed and people in bed till noon makes the house feel like a hospice - which is bad for the rest of the family. > [@bengamo post #124](#): > > we have not curtains. I’m confused about whether or not you have curtains in your house. ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/138 "2020-03-28T20:54:13Z")
Jesus Christ, dude. You’re just not getting this. So here it is, from the top: A 15-year old sleeping 11 hours is normal and healthy. A 15-year old sleeping until 11 am is normal and healthy. If that bothers you, that’s your problem, not hers. My argument is - Sleeping till noon everyday for a fit and healthy person is unhealthy You are wrong. - Not having any sort of schedule or goal and just “slothing” through the day is bad for your mental health You are wrong. - Having curtains closed and people in bed till noon makes the house feel like a hospice - which is bad for the rest of the family. Not her problem. - What is a “reasonable” time to expect a teen (15) to be out of bed? 11:30 am. - Is there any reliable study that I can cite to prove the effects of laziness and oversleeping? No. But there are plenty saying sleeping until noon is healthy, normal, and expected. Do you care or do you just want to remain ignorant, cursing the tide? Teens go to bed no earlier than 11 pm, and they need 10 hours of sleep, so the absolute earliest she should get up is 9. Any earlier would be unhealthy. That’s science. Deal with it. ---
**Author:** ![carrps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carrps/32/2957_2.png) [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/139 "2020-03-28T21:35:04Z")
There’s an excellent book from 2017 called _Why We Sleep._ It’s geared to the general public so it’s an easy read. But it’s also a scary read. F\*ck with a person’s sleep schedule, and there will be serious repercussions. It also mentions the studies that indicate that **teenagers sleeping a couple of hours later and sleeping for 9 or 10 hours** is completely normal. Sleep-deprived your teen, and you could be screwing them up for life. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202/140 "2020-03-28T23:31:12Z")
As far as having her door closed, I think that’s just a teenager thing. I can’t ever remember wanting to leave my door open when I was growing up – I liked having my privacy. Same with my sister, and all of my friends. You just want to be alone, without anyone coming in and bothering you. And with the exception of the cat, our family pretty much respected that concept. So you please, knock before you come in. And by that, I don’t mean knock, and then just walk in. Knock and wait for her to say, “come in.” > [@Powers](#): > > I dunno, I can imagine it’s annoying to have one member of the household missing from morning activities. It’s good for families to eat together, for instance. That doesn’t just mean dinner. > > But it’s true, too, that teens are wired to go to bed late and get up late. > > My suggestion would be to sit the teen down and say “Look, chores aren’t getting done, and we miss seeing you in the mornings when we all get ready and plan the day. And if you sleep too late, it disrupts everyone else’s schedule. How can we resolve this while still making sure you get enough sleep?” > Powers &8^] I can’t ever remember my family eating breakfast or lunch together, except on special occassions. We always just had completely different schedules. Plus nobody really wants to talk in the morning, because we’re still trying to wake up. Surely you know the feeling? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-time-should-a-15-year-old-be-out-of-bed/850202.md?page=8)