# What to do in case of rapture and/or hurricane **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 13, 2003, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077 "2003-07-13T00:36:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Wabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ba9def/32.png) [@Wabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wabbit)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2003, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077/41 "2003-07-13T22:36:41Z")
Heh–if the Rapture involves dead people reanimating in order to pass through the Pearly Gates, does that mean it’s going to be a _Night of the Living Dead_ type of situation? 'Cause if so that’d be pretty damn cool. Does it say anything about having a shotgun in these Rapture survival guides? ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2003, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077/42 "2003-07-13T23:30:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Polycarp \* > This suggests to me that the physical aspect of the Rapture – what an earth scientist would describe it as – is some form of cyclonic storm system. That, along with the fact that that type of storm frequents an area that rather closely follows the Bible Belt, … oh, lots of property available when that whole thing goes down. A big ol’ plot. Can you IMAGINE the Theme Park?😃 ---
**Author:** ![Priam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/77aa72/32.png) [@Priam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Priam)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077/43 "2003-07-14T00:54:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Polycarp \* > \*\*This suggests to me that the physical aspect of the Rapture – what an earth scientist would describe it as – is some form of cyclonic storm system. > > This being the case then, I am confused as to why its strongest advocates assume that it will not include the Friends of Dorothy. > > 😃 > ♫♫ _And the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true_ ♫♫ \*\* _dies laughing_ I love you, Poly. Bear my surrogate children? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077/44 "2003-07-14T01:15:12Z")
Out of curiosity, does _Oh god, oh god, oh god, I’m coming!_ count as prayer? Cuz if so, I’m going to have to make up a new one… ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077/45 "2003-07-14T01:34:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SanibelMan \* > But what _is_ the Mark of the Beast? A UPC code, of course. They were good enough to include a diagram of a UPC symbol, pointing out where the three sixes are. Boy, won’t they be flummoxed when they find out UPC codes are being phased out. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077/46 "2003-07-14T03:49:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by 3waygeek \* > [It’s been done](http://www.rickross.com/groups/heavensgate.html); the hardest part will be convincing the male fundies to [castrate](http://www.positiveatheism.org/writ/heavgate.htm) themselves. 😉 And I suppose crossing religions and offering them 72 virgins when they get to Heaven wouldn’t quite justify that… ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077/47 "2003-07-14T05:41:20Z")
[This](http://www.snopes.com/religion/rapture.htm) seems appropriate to this thread. ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Nader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Darth\_Nader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Nader)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077/48 "2003-07-14T06:02:21Z")
Note to self: Buy: Bottled water Canned food Shotgun Shells Batteries Porn Okay! I’m all set for the hurricane that’s supposed to hit us Tuesday. What? Oh. I see. Is there somewhere I can trade in all this porn for bibles? ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 7:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077/49 "2003-07-14T07:58:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by RTFirefly \* > \*\*Boy, won’t they be flummoxed when they find out UPC codes are being phased out. \*\* Aha, another Satanic plot, the Anti-Christ (et al.) are one step ahead of them. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 8:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077/50 "2003-07-14T08:07:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Darth Nader \* > > Is there somewhere I can trade in all this porn for bibles? ] Oh, there will be, just you wait. Lounsbury’s Magical Emporium of Remaindered Fundy Loot. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077/51 "2003-07-14T13:20:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SanibelMan \* > **Wait a minute. Installed? Forget what I said before, Bill Gates is the Antichrist!** Programmers have known it for years. Simple program you can plug into the QBASIC that comes with most versions of Windows: ```auto BEAST$ = "BILLGATES" FOR X = 1 TO 9 'These lines go through the name LETTER$ = MID$(BEAST$, X, 1) 'of the Beast, convert each letter VALUE = ASC(LETTER$) 'to its ASCII equivalent, and NUMBER = NUMBER + VALUE 'totals them NEXT NUMBER = NUMBER + 3 'He is Bill Gates III, after all PRINT NUMBER ``` ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f07891/32.png) [@Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Plastic_Ninja)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077/52 "2003-07-14T14:32:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Darth Nader \* > \*\*Is there somewhere I can trade in all this porn for bibles? \*\* 😃 When I was going to college, the Knights of BUH were doing a porn-Bibles trade, I believe. Only I can’t remember which way it was going…bibles for porn, or porn for bibles… ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077/53 "2003-07-14T16:52:48Z")
The Knights of BUH? “We are the knights who say BUH! BUH! BUH!” “But sir, I just-” “Not BUT, you infidel! BUH! BUUUUUUH!” “…would you like … a shrubbery?” “We said BUH, not BUSH!” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-in-case-of-rapture-and-or-hurricane/188077.md?page=2)