# What to do with a box of condoms **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 15, 2017, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246 "2017-03-15T17:38:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Loopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loopus/32/15343_2.png) [@Loopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopus)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/1 "2017-03-15T17:38:22Z")
I ordered a box of 36 Trojan condoms on Amazon, but I ordered the wrong size by mistake. Amazon refunded my money, but they don’t want the box back. I hate to just throw them in the trash, but on the other hand I don’t really know what to do with them. Checked my local Planned Parenthood, and they don’t accept donations of condoms. Maybe they’d make good balloon animals. ---
**Author:** ![Defensive\_Indifference](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/defensive_indifference/32/6502_2.png) [@Defensive\_Indifference](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Defensive_Indifference)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/2 "2017-03-15T17:43:47Z")
Give them out at Halloween? ---
**Author:** ![Loopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loopus/32/15343_2.png) [@Loopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopus)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/3 "2017-03-15T17:44:56Z")
I’ll be honest… I kinda like that idea. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/4 "2017-03-15T17:52:44Z")
[14 Innovative Ways To Use Condoms When They’re Not On Your Peen](https://www.buzzfeed.com/alisoncaporimo/condom-time?utm_term=.ubAwbmYgo#.rlM5xwO2E) > [@Loopus](#): > > Amazon refunded my money, but they don’t want the box back. I should hope not! ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/5 "2017-03-15T17:57:19Z")
St Patrick’s Day gifts? Seriously, go to a bar, get liquored up, and hand them out one at a time. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/6 "2017-03-15T17:58:10Z")
♬\* What shall we do with a box of condoms What shall we do with a box of condoms What shall we do with a box of condoms Ear-lye in the morning?\* ♬\* Give them out as Halloween treats Give them out as Halloween treats Give them out as Halloween treats Ear-lye in the morning!\* ♬ ---
**Author:** ![mikecurtis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mikecurtis/32/3284_2.png) [@mikecurtis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mikecurtis)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/7 "2017-03-15T17:59:47Z")
theyre often used as waterproof/sweatproof containers for wireless mic packs. if you know of a struggling theatrical company you might want to donate to them. mc ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tim_r.mortiss/32/142_2.png) [@Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_R.Mortiss)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/8 "2017-03-15T18:14:39Z")
What size are they? If they are XXL, I’ll take them off your hands. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/9 "2017-03-15T18:18:52Z")
You could donate them to a [Scottish regiment](http://www.netfunny.com/rhf/jokes/88q4/15672.html). ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/10 "2017-03-15T18:24:28Z")
> [@Tim\_R.Mortiss](#): > > What size are they? If they are XXL, I’ll take them off your hands. I don’t think they’re supposed to go _on_ the hands. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/11 "2017-03-15T18:47:12Z")
Funny enough, my gyno uses them to put over the wand for transvaginal ultrasounds. Try there. Perhaps a local health clinic as opposed to Planned Parenthood may take them too. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/12 "2017-03-15T18:48:40Z")
> [@Tim\_R.Mortiss](#): > > What size are they? If they are XXL, I’ll take them off your hands. Let’s see if I can remember this one… The U.S. Missile Command received a new series of ICBMs. The only problem was, they were very susceptible to moisture. To combat this, the Pentagon ordered condoms that would fit the entire missile. These kept moisture off of the missile, were light enough that the missile could be launched with them on, and would not be a problem during staging. Russian spies heard of the condoms and wanted to steal some. But the Pentagon was a step ahead of them. They _let_ the Russians steal a shipment of condoms – all stamped ‘Medium’. (I could also make a joke about putting condoms on the warheads as penetration aids, but I don’t know how many would get that.) ---
**Author:** ![GaryM](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garym/32/241_2.png) [@GaryM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaryM)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/13 "2017-03-15T18:49:46Z")
Some folks in the military use them to blouse their trousers. ---
**Author:** ![Defensive\_Indifference](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/defensive_indifference/32/6502_2.png) [@Defensive\_Indifference](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Defensive_Indifference)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/14 "2017-03-15T19:09:13Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > [14 Innovative Ways To Use Condoms When They’re Not On Your Peen](https://www.buzzfeed.com/alisoncaporimo/condom-time?utm_term=.ubAwbmYgo#.rlM5xwO2E) I like the BB gun idea. **Loopus** , are the condoms lubed, ribbed, glow in the dark, flavored, studded, or anything other than just plain latex? If they’re lubed, for example, you probably don’t want to use them as waterproof socks, which was one of the suggestions in the linked article. Unless you’re at a party with a Slip N Slide. That might be cool. If they’re those natural ones, you could maybe use them as sausage casings. ---
**Author:** ![74westy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/74westy/32/3950_2.png) [@74westy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/74westy)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/15 "2017-03-15T19:19:27Z")
Water balloons ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/16 "2017-03-15T19:23:38Z")
> [@GaryM](#): > > Some folks in the military use them to blouse their trousers. What does this mean? ---
**Author:** ![TheChileanBlob](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thechileanblob/32/435_2.png) [@TheChileanBlob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheChileanBlob)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/17 "2017-03-15T19:31:46Z")
I’ve heard some people put heroin in them and stick them up their butt, you could try that. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![GaryM](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garym/32/241_2.png) [@GaryM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaryM)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/18 "2017-03-15T19:31:49Z")
> [@Procrustus](#): > > What does this mean? They tie the condom around the bottom edge of their trouser leg just above the boot top. This holds it in place and the extra material “blouses” over the top of the cinched up part. They make straps for the same purpose, but some folks I know used condoms they got for free. Might be a WW2 holdover. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/19 "2017-03-15T19:47:00Z")
Is it snowing where you are? Fill them with colored water and set them outside to freeze. Then pop the condom and have cool outdoor decorations! ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2017, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246/20 "2017-03-15T20:10:31Z")
> [@Bayard](#): > > Give them out at Halloween? This gum doesn’t taste very good but it lasts a long time. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-a-box-of-condoms/782246.md?page=2)