# What to do with this goat... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 10, 2002, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200 "2002-07-10T05:52:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ResIpsaLoquitor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b3f665/32.png) [@ResIpsaLoquitor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ResIpsaLoquitor)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/1 "2002-07-10T05:52:14Z")
So I was chatting with…oh, another Doper tonight, and in the course of making a pun, I managed to **get her goat**. 🆒 Of course, now that I’ve got this goat, I’m wondering what to do with it. It keeps eating all the posts. Any suggestions? ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/2 "2002-07-10T06:03:57Z")
Fel…nah. Too easy. You could sacrifice it to Shub-Niggurath in a frenzy of orgiastic abandon. Or raise it up right and watch it become the Beast with Seven Horns of Revelation. Or pass it along on the next White Elephant. Or send it here. I hate cutting the grass. jayjay ---
**Author:** ![Juniper200](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@Juniper200](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Juniper200)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/3 "2002-07-10T06:06:16Z")
Save it. We’ve got some Clique initiations next week and we’ll be needing it for… Oh nutbunnies. I wasn’t supposed to say anything about that, was I? Attention Team Fuscia: the frog has burst. I repeat, the frog has burst. This is not a dril. ---
**Author:** ![Juniper200](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@Juniper200](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Juniper200)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/4 "2002-07-10T06:07:18Z")
Or a drill, either. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/5 "2002-07-10T06:30:08Z")
I have absolutely no idea what you could do with the goat you seem to have acquired, **Res** ,except make sure it doesn’t come near me. 😉 You see, I could not abide it chewing on things that have become precious to me. Besides, I’m not sure it would be appreciated in the apartment building. Actually, wait… I do have some ideas: [ul] [li]make sure it eats lots of grass[/li][li]milk it if you like the taste of goat milk (I wouldn’t like it, but you may be different)[/li][li]name it… though I don’t think “the Flaming Hamster” wi\ould be an appropriate name ;([/li][li]after you’ve taken care of its needs, send it to my sister… that will be her Chrismas present (yes, I know it’s only July, but you can never do enough thinking ahead)[/li][li]get it a companion so it won’t be lonely[/li][li]just think: you can do a study to find out what music goats really like (rock, pop, country, world, New Age, R&B, etc.)[/li][li]keep it for use as an object lesson… might be useful in illustrating law principles later on, though I don’t know if goats or other animlas are allowed in Michigan/Philadelphia courts[/li][li]whatever else you might do with it, do NOT bake it into a pie for **Persephone**! (she’ll not appreciate it, I’m quite sure)[/li][li]and I don’t really think you should make a goat-hair pillow for **scout1222** , either… I hear she has terrible allergies; besides, the pillow might smell[/li][/ul] By the way, is it a nanny goat or a billy goat? F\_X ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 6:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/6 "2002-07-10T06:35:32Z")
Oh, crap. My typing issues seem to be affecting my posts. The smiley at the end of one of my ideas was supposed to be a ;). And the mangled word was supposed to be “would.” Apologies to all who have to read my last post… it’s not exactly a model of great typing. Hopefully, you now know what I mean. And yes, I should preview, but I thought it looked fine after looking at it. I think I should just go to bed now. Good night, all. 🙂 F\_X ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 6:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/7 "2002-07-10T06:50:30Z")
And, of course, “animlas” should be “animals.” Sigh… :smack: Hey! Did you take one of my goats? Here I was, thinking that you’d perhaps taken another goat from somewhere or other, and then I looked at my own herd. One is now missing. What have you done with poor Tessie? Knowing you, I don’t think you’ve done anything despicable with her, but if you want my property, at least ask first before you take it. I would of course like her back, but if you want her, we shall have to negotiate. You can have her free of charge, I guess… but wht about the sentimental value and all? F\_X ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/8 "2002-07-10T06:51:12Z")
And, of course, “animlas” should be “animals.” Sigh… :smack: Hey! Did you take one of my goats? Here I was, thinking that you’d perhaps taken another goat from somewhere or other, and then I looked at my own herd. One is now missing. What have you done with poor Tessie? Knowing you, I don’t think you’ve done anything despicable with her, but if you want my property, at least ask first before you take it. I would of course like her back, but if you want her, we shall have to negotiate. You can have her free of charge, I guess… but what about the sentimental value and all? F\_X ---
**Author:** ![leechbabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7cd45c/32.png) [@leechbabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leechbabe)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/9 "2002-07-10T07:04:00Z")
Hey **Res** did you let your goat out near my post at all, 'cos I seem to be having some problems here and at first I thought the hampsters ate it but now… ---
**Author:** ![Caught\_Work](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/919ad9/32.png) [@Caught\_Work](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caught_Work)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 9:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/10 "2002-07-10T09:24:07Z")
The first thing to do when you get the goat is to shave it and oil it up good and proper. From there, you’re on your own. ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 9:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/11 "2002-07-10T09:57:12Z")
Apparently [UncleBeer likes goats](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?postid=1695070#post1695070). Brought to you by [The Best Pit Rants](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=118394) thread. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 10:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/12 "2002-07-10T10:33:49Z")
HMMM… This sounds odd but my jamacian and hispanic friends wouldnt mind a deep pit bbq … I’m told its very tender when slowly roasted for 12 hours or so … ---
**Author:** ![EggNogg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/eb8c5e/32.png) [@EggNogg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EggNogg)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/13 "2002-07-10T12:51:33Z")
I’d cramb it in a envelope and mail it to Cuba egg ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/14 "2002-07-10T13:03:07Z")
What to do with this goat… Why, launch it into space, of course! I’ve got the PVC pipe you could borrow! 😃 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![ResIpsaLoquitor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b3f665/32.png) [@ResIpsaLoquitor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ResIpsaLoquitor)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/15 "2002-07-10T14:07:21Z")
I still don’t know if this is a male or a female goat…I wasn’t willing to lift up its kilt to check. If it’s female, I could pump out milk and make chocolate for everyone. Uhoh, he’s charging after another incoming post… :::::Bleat! Bleat!::::: ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/16 "2002-07-10T14:32:21Z")
"Milk’ it. 😉 [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=113110&highlight=goat](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=113110&highlight=goat) ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/17 "2002-07-10T14:37:48Z")
Rent it out [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=74812&highlight=\*goat\*](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=74812&highlight=%2Agoat%2A) ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/18 "2002-07-10T14:54:26Z")
The Sky’s the limit with goats. [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=41020&highlight=launch+goat](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=41020&highlight=launch+goat) ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/19 "2002-07-10T20:40:52Z")
> [@](#): > > whatever else you might do with it, do NOT bake it into a pie for Persephone! (she’ll not appreciate it, I’m quite sure) Oh good heavens, no! Pie? Bleargh! I usually just toss 'em out in the backyard onto the compost pile after I’m done sacrificing them. ---
**Author:** ![c\_goat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f4b2a3/32.png) [@c\_goat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/c_goat)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200/20 "2002-07-10T21:11:21Z")
Yeah, I got someone’s goat a while ago, now it eats all my webpages. [http://www.goatsoft.com/nosuchpage](http://www.goatsoft.com/nosuchpage) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-to-do-with-this-goat/118200.md?page=2)