Well, I think it would be a good idea if all of us of every possible theological and philosophical bent tried to be nicer to each other and more respectful of each other’s positions. As a rule, however, I find that is the Christians who generally feel that they have the right to dictate the behavior of the rest of society, and thus come under return fire.
I’ll have to agree with gobear.
(and I’m praying for im! )
Kidding, I’m not, really.
Based on what the OP says this woman said, I fail to see how she was trying to dictate his behavior, or that of the rest of society.
Her comment that she prays that he be helped seems to indicate that she has the right to comment on his speech from a superior vantage point.
Um, were you talking to someone while using all this filthy language? Cause if I saw a man walking down the street alone and saying obscenities, I’d probably be moved to pray for him too, and perhaps let him know that I was concerned about his mental state. (Well, I probably wouldn’t say anything to him, but others might do so innocently.)
My favorite thing is when I’m getting “Jesused” whilst I’m minding my own business is to just look straight into that person’s eyes and hiss as loud as I can.
Of course, I just thought how fun it would be to genuflect and make the sign of the cross with the middle finger. But that just seems timely.
-----or-------
[spoiler]
“I stopped believing in Jesus and God after my priest raped me”[\spoiler]
Depending on the approach of the prayer, as the prayee my response usually ranges from a subtle rolleyes and failure to acknowledge their existence, to a firm “No thank you” or outright venomous “Don’t bother!”
I get offended by lots of things people do on the street, but it’s not up to me to tell them (or imply) what they should or shouldn’t be doing with their bodies and their mouths or minds. I suck it up and ignore them, or avoid them. I expect the same courtesy from others.
And the assumption that he is sorely lacking something that she alone can give him, something that he cannot give himself. It reminds me of the attitude of some people that atheists have simply not heard The Word, rather than believing that they may not have liked what they heard.
It’s rude and presumptuous, and assumes that the intended recipient is an idiot.
Actually, according to Jesus, it is.
I dislike everday profanity – it’s a tool, whose value is best when kept sharp by minimal use. I will never forget the expression on the guy who was maintaining that the only reason for gay marriages was “to get society’s recognition and approval for their gratifying their vile lusts.” Having courteously argued with him for several minutes before he came off with that line, I looked and asked, “So the only reason you married your wife is to regularly get fucked?”
Wouldn’t have been half as effective if I’d called his comments bullshit a minute before. But the vulgarity interjected in the middle of what were otherwise thoughtful and polite-language comments actually shocked him enough to recognize my underlying point.
But that’s my choice – I don’t claim to be the tender of Slick’s vocabulary. And if he wants some sin in his syntax, that’s his privilege.
Actually, I’ve prayed for a lot of people here – but not, usually, for their conversion. Instead, for the needs they have and for them to have the mental states needed to deal with those needs. Once I woke up to the crisis happening, I prayed for Ryle Dup – that he might find a sense of hope, the courage to persevere and subdue his inner demons (metaphorical) and that he might fiond and be healed by the help he needs. I prayed for Siege and the others who were ministering to him, that they might have the strength they needed to do what needed doing.
I’ve prayed for one dear friend who’s posted here, whose life has been condemned by people whose love of the Bible seems to have enabled them to miss the entire point about why Jesus condemned the Pharisees, that the God in whom he doesn’t believe might grant him a sense of peace and of His love, and someday bring him to a point where he can forgive those who sinned against him, supposedly in His name.
I never planned on making any of those prayers public. But I felt, maybe wrongly, that saying that there’s a time when a prayer can be an act of caring and not of judgment, was something that needed to be added to the mix here.
Hey Poly, In case you’re talking about me, I totally forgive the fundies and bear no grudges whatsoever. Don’t paint me as some bitter person who doesn’t forgive.
And thank you for the prayers; I know they are intended kindly.
How about just shrugging and saying, “Eh, you do that.”
Really, this is pretty mild on the offensive meter.
Interesting responses.
How would you recommend responding if the language being used was something genuinely offensive to your sense of propriety?
Suppose, instead of
it becomes
Would it be appropriate to come back with some snappy remarks to someone who volunteered to pray for you then?
My apologies for the language, but I doubt it would mean the same if I used asterisks.
Regards,
Shodan
[quote]
But you miss the point that it is not merely a difference in sensitivities. “Faggot” and “nigger” are words that are usually aimed at a target, whereas
swear words are just colorful adjectives. In any event, I don’t make it a point to correct a stranger’s manners, which nowadays is akin to having a death wish.
Remember that the OP was complaing abpout being accosted by a complete stranger as he was walking down the street. The woman who bothed him was not forced to listen, she was not confined with him and his language, he was walking down the street!
Merciful Zeus, if I were to correct the speech of every passerby on the street as I walk to the Metro, I’d be there for hours, hopping about and shouting, “Desist from your profanity, sir!”
Besides, if the southeast DC population were barred from using the “m-f” word, they’d be mute.
I want to be the one to hand Shodan his diploma from Strawman U . Your argument makes the Alma Mater proud.
Pray what? That I wouldn’t be (hypothetically speaking) a racist anymore?
I don’t walk up and make unwelcome/rude/presumptuous comments to strangers, and I don’t want them doing that to me. It’s really quite simple, and the fact that they’re also trying to shove a little religion in my face in the process only makes it marginally more annoying.
I leave people alone, and have – I think – a reasonable expectation to be left alone myself when going about my daily business. Maybe I should start interjecting myself into public prayer and trying to explain to them how I think they’re wasting their time.
Live and let live, and leave me alone.
Well, some people don’t walk around in public using profanity and talking about “dirty movies,” and maybe they don’t want others doing that around them.
So is the issue here that this woman said something in regard to the OP’s language, or that she brought religion into it? It seems people are taking issue with what she said, but aren’t realizing that the things the OP was saying may have been equally offensive.
Like I said earlier, for many Christians, Jews and Muslims, the term “goddamn” is about as offenisve as it gets.
But don’t get me wrong, her method does seem condescending and rude-- If the woman were to ask me “What to say to those who profane God’s name?” I certainly wouldn’t tell her "Say, ‘I’ll pray for you so that you’ll be helped.’ "-- but the OP isn’t completely blameless in this situation either.
So, have you been rendered immobile so that you can’t move away? Here’s the thing. . you don’t own the public spaces and you don;t get to tell other people how to behave.
Well, you don’t own the public spaces either, so to tell someone they can’t say “I’ll pray for you” seems a little contradictive to me. That said, Shodan, I totally agree with your post. To use the name of Jesus as a curse word seems pretty offensive to me. But I don’t usually offer to pray for anyone, because chances are I won’t. I was at a restaurant, and the guy sitting by me was cursing up a storm. I asked him to please stop, as my wife and kids were with me. He did, and when I left I thanked him, and really did appreciate his attitude. I was also on the sky train, and some little kid was doing the same. I said please don’t swear so loud in the presence of a lady, and he was quiet. Does he have a right to swear? Sure. Do I have a right to ask him to stop? Sure. And I think the lady was asking the op to stop, in the only way she knew how. It does amaze me that a lady would have to ask a man to stop swearing in her presence though, but maybe I was brought up old school.
Gimme a break. Was she telling the OP how to behave? And are you saying it’s okay to have a blue conversation in public?
Yes, I can’t stop someone from doing it, but that doesn’t mean it should be done, just like what the lady did shouldn’t be done.
He offended someone, is it so shocking that someone called him on it? And according to your arguement, gobear, you don’t get to tell people how to behave either. If she wants to pray for him and tell him about it, who’s going to stop her. Why is everyone getting into such a huff over what she said? If one side is going to have no resriction on their language, why should the other?
Just because something doesn’t offend you (profanity in public, etc.), doesn’t mean it won’t offend others. And if that holier-than-thou lady were here, I’d tell her the same thing.
B/c i didn’t ask for their help. If i gave someone a prize of 12 kicks in the pants for free and they didn’t ask for it, the last thing i expect is Thanks.
“learning, writing, reading” are not interests? I’ll be goddamned. I just checked your profile and you seem about as fun as a tax audit. ***
No no no no no no! There was no cursing left and right by neither me nor my cronies!
Is my “religion” not par with their’s? I have to be subjected to their religion helping b/c mine isn’t good enough? I’m Catholic, don’t particularly like it. But as i will say later i’m not totally insenstive to others’ feelings so i’m going to tell them that God is dead, or they are wasting their time. I don’t feel that a snappy comeback from them is something i should be receiving, at least from my POV. If you tell a Muslim that you will pray to God that they see the error of their “false religion” then that is gonna put them off, i would think at least.
See the [story] below.
Very well spoken my friend.
But dude, i didn’t say nigger or faggot or terrorist. I slip 1 of 3 choice words every so often. Shit, fuck, and god damn are like, a general way of saying stuff. I don’ tknow how to put it. In other words i am not targeting anyone in particular with those 3. Can anyone help me explain this?
Just reading the posts/counterposts in this thread i begin to notice a pattern that no one will ever be completely happy with the other side. Boundaries will always be crossed regardless of the issue. I won’t be happy having someone tell me they will pray for me, and the same person wont’ be happy when i tell them to suck it.
***notice how i didn’t say he sounds like real piece of shit? When i talk directly to somebody i’m mindful of what i say. I’m not gonna fling names/insults/etc at them b/c i’m not totally insensitive of others’ feelings.
But it just seems to me that [story] when i am with 2 of my friends and we get to talking about the stupid customers we have to deal with everyday and we try to unwind and vent off steam while we walk along the sidewalk to get to another friend’s house that a few mild explitives just sound RIGHT!!! No one saying “that fucking motherfucker, stupid goddamn motherfucker i’ll kill his shitty ass if he asks me for a fucking lightbulb. That stupid dumbass has shit for brains and i’ll fucking tell him to fucking leave next time. Shiiiiiit” [/story]