Any Walkers biscuits except for the shortbread. The shortbreads are available in pretty much any store in the U.S., but to get any of the others, I have to order them online or get them at the duty free shop on my way home from the U.K.
I would (until just over a month ago, when I moved) regularly (i.e., once or twice a week) shop at one or other of the nearby Ralphs stores in the Los Angeles suburbs where I lived. I do not think Pasadena and its environs are a backwater. Ralphs is a Kroger subsidiary. I have not seen any of the items I listed in a Ralphs since about 1991 when one of the stores stopped carrying the Canadian version of Marmite. I have seen Golden Syrup once in in 20 years in a regular supermarket in California (not a Ralphs, but a Vons, which is a Safeway subsidiary). The next time I went back to get some more, they had ceased to carry it (and I have shopped at that store, and at other Vons branches, many times since without seeing it).
The things I listed are not staples in America. I am a Marmite addict, prepared to go to considerable trouble to find it. I have looked for Marmite, in particular, in multiple supermarkets in at least three states besides California, and only once found it (in a single store in Tucson, Arizona). To get my fix, I have had to rely on specialty shops (and unless they specialize specifically in British food, few of them have it either), and occasionally, ordering online. Most of the other items on my list seem to be even rarer (and less well known to Americans) than Marmite. The fact that some people can occasionally find one or other of them in a non-specialty store in their area, or even regularly find them in certain stores, does not refute the fact that they are not American staples and are not familiar to most Americans.
I would do tea, biscuits, and a Cadbury tin.
I find most of these things easy to get in the U.S., but they seem very British and just because I can get these things to my satisfaction (the Cadbury tin of chocolates an Irish friend brings back to me when she travels), doesn’t mean that they won’t be appreciated.
I can’t understand not getting good tea. I get mine over the internet from Harney and Sons.
I didn’t say they were staples, just very common on the international aisle of the largest/second largest grocer in the US, depending on what you measure.
Maybe they’re not as common as Aunt Jemima syrup or Oscar Mayer hot dogs, but they’re still more common than a lot of relatively common specialty stuff like imported butter and many cheeses. The selection’s not huge, but it’s at least somewhat representative of what a lot of expats might miss- HP Sauce, pickled onions, chocolates & candies, Marmite, etc…
And a term of derision for the vastly better Bears’ fans, as well as most of the nation.
You’re from Bolton, right? Why not take something local, and that Americans really won’t have heard of, like parkin or Uncle Joe’s Mint Balls?
Pick up a few steamed puddings, like spotted dick. Tesco’s microwavable spotted dick (ginger, golden syrup, etc,) is small enough that you can carry a few pairs easily. You have the flavor of a traditional English dish and the added entertainment value of watching people snigger or blush when they read the name.
I’ll second, third, fourth or whatever number we’re up to on the Jaffa Cakes. You can never go wrong with them. Maybe look for another flavor than orange, maybe raspberry. I think I’ve seen orange Jaffa Cakes fairly commonly in American dollar stores.
Sticking with the sweets, a few tubes of Smarties. What M&Ms should be. One or two Curly-Wurly bars for the folks who remember the American Marathon Bar from the 1970’s.
Go the other direction in flavor for Norfolk’s favorite mustard, Colmans. The metal tubes would be great. Americans don’t get many foods in metal tubes anymore. If you want to be sneaky, slather some of that on someone’s cheese sandwich and watch their eyes water. It looks like mild American mustard but it’s not!
In a “bringing coals to Newcastle” theme, a short tube or two of Pringles in flavors that aren’t available in the US, like paprika or the southeast Asian flavors. Old El Paso Salsa is quite different outside the US than it is in America. A couple of mixer-sized (150ml) Coca-colas. I wish they had Schweppes Bitter Lemon in that size.
Pack a Sun or News of the World. They’re always an interesting read.
If you anticipate meeting someone disagreeable, carry a pack of Cherry Mint Orbit gum. It tastes like medicine, but in fun chewing gum form!
They do! Well, 125ml.
I don’t know if they’re available for retail, though…
Just remember that they’re NSFW! 
Damn that Tesco! Hoarding all the good stuff for itself.
Special K Bliss Chocolate Mint cereal bars. I don’t know why they don’t offer them here - I’m sure my husband and I could buy enough to make it cost effective - but they are so good and I can’t wait to go to the UK next month and load up on them!
Also, Jaffa Cakes, and there is another type of ginger cookie in a green package that is just ridiculously amazing. I forget the name, though; I’ll have to see if I can find them on my trip!
I have been able to more or less get every sort of foodstuff from the UK here in America. Most large cities have shops that import the stuff. When I lived in Massachusetts I made a hobby of visiting all of the “Taste of Britain” type shops.
Three things don’t exist in good quality here, though.
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Mr Kipling’s cakes. I f’love Mr Kipling. I would have been a fat kid if not for my mum’s careful rationing of this stuff. Our local international market does carry the Apple and Blackcurrant and Apple pies BUT they are almost always stale and crumbly. (Hey Mr Kipling! How about vacuum packing your stuff?) But even in this state they’re pretty amazing and I will pay ridiculous amounts every so often for a pack.
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Any kind of meat pie (steak & kidney, Cornish pasties, sausage rolls, pork pies). There is an outfit out of Florida that makes a reasonable facsimile. But the stuff you can get at any high street bakery in the UK is just not available here. I used to get decent bangers and bacon from the Irish market in Boston.
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Amazing cheese. But I think this is because I haven’t tried hard enough; we’ve got great cheesemongers in Austin.
I think you might be prohibited by law to bring in meat from the UK but if not, I’d bring a ton of sausage rolls and pork pies. Then wait for the city of Green Bay to erect a statue in your honor.
Like a Norwegian Blue?
Lush bath bombs! I know there’s a ton of stores in the US now, as opposed to like 10 years ago, but not in Wisconsin. Except, apparently, in a place called Wauwatosa, near Milwaukee.
I’m leaning towards several packs of hobnobs / jaffa cakes and some choccies at the mo. DOn’t know why, but it would seem weird to me to show up bearing cheese!
You could show them that real chedder cheese isn’t orange. (To be fair though, a lot of Americans have become aware of this fact.)